I’m reviewing: What Love Feels Like I Suppose
Written by:Agillett
My only hope is that this review teaches me something about the writer, helps the writer to improve, helps me to improve my own writing and encourages others to read the piece and give their valuable input.
When I state that a poem is a good poem, what do I mean?
This poem is good because:
It has certain qualities that I find admirable It does something technically difficult very well It is a well-crafted and thought-out expression of language It appeals and I agree with its message It reminds me of something else I really like It moves me emotionally
The Six Basic Elements of a Poem :
IMAGERY, THEME, DISCOURSE, VOICE AND TONE-
I LOVE the images in this piece, they are so unique. Your discourse is original, not littered with cliches and the theme is just clearly felt. I love your tone and voice in this piece, it really does just bring this altogether.
RHYTHM-
You carried a beat. The rhythm was just great and just really worked well with this poem.
LINE BREAKS-
Whoa, look at those line breaks. I think I've read this piece at least 5 or 6 times and I just stop at the end of each line and just let it sink in. Your line breaks rock and it's been a while since I've seen line breaks that have rocked this hard.
FIGURES OF SPEECH-
I love your use of similes here. I mean, they are what really brings this poem together and makes it work. This is just so well done.
WORD MUSIC-
The direct rhyme in this poem is not forced and flows naturally but for me it's the repetition of the piece that really stands out.
Overall, You know, I love simple poetry and I read this piece and loved it instantly. I came back to do a review and just was shocked at the low rating. I've sent this to people who just loved it to death and then when I mentioned the rating they too were shocked. One said, "I would be hurt to see such a low rating...and it captures the more abstract ideas of love very well". I have to agree and further more, I am hurt for you-this is just well done poetry.
When I think "simple poetry" this piece is what I think of, it's a great example of what I mean. I know I've posted up pieces like this and have been told that it's "not deep enough for a love poem" and other such foolishness. Well it is deep. It's the simplicity that makes it "deep". One thing I've not mentioned is your stanza's. I love how you have your stanza's set up for this. So much about this poem just works for me and I wish people would set aside their prejudices to see that it's simple and yet so well written.
I hope you have a great day that’s filled with tons of fun things to write, read, rate and review!-Kat
My only hope is that this review teaches me something about the writer, helps the writer to improve, helps me to improve my own writing and encourages others to read the piece and give their valuable input.
When I state that a poem is a good poem, what do I mean?
This poem is good because:
It has certain qualities that I find admirable It is a well-crafted and thought-out expression of language It appeals and I agree with its message It gives me a clear movie like picture image in my mind
The Six Basic Elements of a Poem :
IMAGERY, THEME, DISCOURSE, VOICE AND TONE-
Okay, you got to love the imagery in this piece, it's just wonderful. The theme is easy to pick out and the voice and tone are clear.
RHYTHM-
Your rhythm is great, the meter well done throughout the piece.
LINE BREAKS-
Effective end-stopped lines really work with this piece. Well done.
FIGURES OF SPEECH-
I would have liked to see better use of figures of speech in this piece but I'm not sure if the end result would have been just as fun.
WORD MUSIC-
The direct rhyme in this poem is not forced and flows naturally but I think I would have liked to see a bit of indirect rhyme as well. Not taking points off for that but it did come to mind and it would be interesting to see what you can do with it.
Overall, Overall you did a wonderful job on this one. I've read it several times and just love it. Thanks for the read!
I hope you have a great day that’s filled with tons of fun things to write, read, rate and review!-Kat
My only hope is that this review teaches me something about the writer, helps the writer to improve, helps me to improve my own writing and encourages others to read the piece and give their valuable input.
When I state that a poem is a good poem, what do I mean?
This poem is good because:
It has certain qualities that I find admirable It does something technically difficult very well It is a well-crafted and thought-out expression of language It appeals and I agree with its message It reminds me of something else I really like It moves me emotionally It gives me a clear movie like picture image in my mind
The Six Basic Elements of a Poem :
IMAGERY, THEME, DISCOURSE, VOICE AND TONE-
I really do like the image used in this poem,"Iridescent spots on butterfly wings" which is just lovely to me. You also avoid cliche expressions and use symbolism very well. The theme of the piece is very clear and and the voice and tone completely support the theme, discourse and imagery.
RHYTHM-
I found the rhythm in your piece to be great. The words fit and flowed when put together. Everything sounded right. The meter did not sound mechanical and it carried a beat.
LINE BREAKS-
The lines in this piece create suspense and movement allowing the poem to move swiftly. The piece uses effective end-stopped lines that have strong end-words that allow me to pause long enough to consider the line.
FIGURES OF SPEECH-
Your comparisons are unique and original, helping to make new connections between the compared terms. You really shine here!
WORD MUSIC-
The direct rhyme in this poem is not forced and flows naturally. I have to say that I love your use of alliteration in the first stanza. It really pulled me into the piece.
Overall, I really just enjoyed this piece. It's been a while since I've read something so simple and yet so enjoyable. Thanks for sharing it.
I hope you have a great day that’s filled with tons of fun things to write, read, rate and review!-Kat
My only hope is that this review teaches me something about the writer, helps the writer to improve, helps me to improve my own writing and encourages others to read the piece and give their valuable input.
When I state that a poem is a good poem, what do I mean?
This poem is good because:
It has certain qualities that I find admirable It does something technically difficult very well It is a well-crafted and thought-out expression of language It teaches me something new and surprises me. It moves me emotionally It gives me a clear movie like picture image in my mind
The Six Basic Elements of a Poem :
IMAGERY, THEME, DISCOURSE, VOICE AND TONE-
I found the discourse of this poem to be void of cliché expressions and the theme in this poem was clear and presented well also. The voice and tone of this poem was well done and supported the theme, discourse and imagery.
RHYTHM-
I found the rhythm in your piece to be great. The words fit and flowed when put together. It really was enjoyable.
LINE BREAKS-
I actually liked the line breaks, they just really added to this piece.
FIGURES OF SPEECH-
I didn't see much use of figures of speech in this piece but what was used was used well.
WORD MUSIC-
I have to say that this is where I felt the poem shined. Your indirect rhyme really works with this pieces. Repetition of words bring this together and allows a natural flow.
Overall, Overall I found this to be a touching piece that really stands out. I enjoyed reading it.
I hope you have a great day that’s filled with tons of fun things to write, read, rate and review!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: Just a little piece that speaks the truth.
Format/Flow:You got a nice format here and it works with the piece. The flow is well done, your line breaks are well done. It all works well.
Word choice:You got some powerful words here. You got alliteration and repetition going on here that really bring this piece to life.
Favorite line:"Vinny, life is not a game..."
I'm going to have to go with the ending here. You step away from it all and just put this line out that that just stands out. It's strong and stays with the reader and I like that.
Suggestions:I could find nothing to suggest here.
Finale Thoughts:You know, this piece really works for me. I love it, it flows, it feels honest and it speaks. I love the voice, I love the style, I love the tone and from start to finish, it stays simple and to the point.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content:
The story about how one fights to overcome all odds.
Format/Flow:The format is well done. I did have a bit of trouble with the flow and felt that at times the meter was off at the end.
Word choice:I love the word choice for this piece. You picked words that were simple and yet emotional.
Favorite line:
"The pain, the screaming
She can't seem to stop
Her skin is on fire
The water's too hot"
I can't even get that image out of my mind. Every time I read that stanza I get a shiver down my back, my heart drops to my stomach and I feel the need to just break down and cry.
Suggestions:I have no other comments.
Finale Thoughts:This is a good piece, well written, kept simple for everyone to enjoy and understand and relate to.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: An African Sunrise in beautiful detail.
Format/Flow:Free form piece that stays free form through out. I like that because it gives no confusion and doesn't distract from the flow that is developed through line breaks and word play.
Word choice:You use words that are visually appealing and really bring the sunrise into the mind of the reader.You also use words to bring in taste and smell and even sound. You use some lovely alliteration in this piece also.
Favorite line:"Sun-kissed clouds, that drift in drowsy wisps, drape themselves across the heavens"
Love the imagery and the alliteration in this line.
Suggestions:I have no other suggestions.
Finale Thoughts:This was well worth the read. I love how you brought this piece alive by touching on all the senses and playing with words.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: Piper Limmericks that are fun!
Format/Flow: The format and flow here are just fun. Everything just rolls right off the tongue and is visually appealing.
Word choice: Your word choice here is sweet. We have a lot of word play going on here: Alliteration, Assonance and Consonance. It really brings this piece to life and gives it character.
Favorite line:"Silence was broken by a four year old's cry."
Nice Alliteration there! It really does make this piece work.
Suggestions:I have no suggestions for this piece.
Finale Thoughts:This was simple, this was fun and this really, really worked. I loved it.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: Your family dog needs a little lovin too...bring on the chocolate!
Format/Flow:The format of this piece is nicely done. I found the flow to be well done also but did notice a stumble in the second stanza, second line. Other than that, it works.
Word choice:Love your word choice here. Your rhyme doesn't feel forced and the piece is allowed to flow.
Favorite line:"Silence was broken by a four year old's cry."
That is a line opener!
Suggestions:I have no other suggestions or this piece.
Finale Thoughts:I really enjoyed this piece. The opening line pulled me in, instantly my heart jumped and I was ready for the tears to flow. But, you gave this a twist, kept it simple and instead of tears, my heart just melted with an "awwww".
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: An Angel does his thing.
Format/Flow: I love the format that you used here, it makes it easy to read. Your flow, there were some areas that seemed a bit off due to lines being long (meter) but for the most part it held up.
Word choice: You managed to rhyme but at times I thought there was a bit of force to the rhymes. Lines were extended in order to get that rhyme in and it really through me off during those sections.
Favorite line:“Ahhh, my smallest angel, I see you completed your task
And did much more than that, without being asked."
These lines seem natural to me and flow really well.
Suggestions:I have no other suggestions for this piece.
Finale Thoughts:This is a nice piece, tells a great story and keeps the story telling simple.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: Pirates! YIPEE!
Format/Flow:Format rocks! Flow, OMG valley girl awesome here!
From one line to the next it just flows. ...nice...
Word choice: Can I say, "Perfect word choice here." and not sound like a suck up? Eh, who cares, "Perfect word choice here." You know, your words just set the tone and bring out the images.
Favorite line:"Sailors: fear not and look ahead
The glow of red is in favor of us"
This is an opening that pulls the reader in. I like to favorite every line here but I got to pick me just one and this is that one.
Suggestions:No suggestions.
Finale Thoughts:I just loved it. It's just peachy, made me all peachy and happy. I could read it over and over. Rock on.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Format/Flow:Sweet format and nice flow in this piece.
Word choice:Your word choice just rocks. You use words that fit the style and create the tone that makes this piece work.
Favorite line:"Begging my bread in those,
long roads along the lines of life."
This is the way to start any piece off. Strong lines to pull the reader in.
Suggestions: I could find nothing else to suggest here.
Finale Thoughts:You know, you use some of my favorite elements of poetry here and you use them well. We got repeation, alliteration, assonace, imagery and so much more. It just really, really works and you work it well my dear, you just work it well.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: Ha! Everyone woman with a husband can relate to this I believe. "Husband is instantly dying from common cold!"- Jerkwater Press News Report (aka-Katrinia17) Got to love it!
Format/Flow:Format is great but the flow was one thing that I had an issue with. Some lines seemed a bit long and I felt it took away from the piece. Example:
"The missus only smiles and nods
and keeps that medicine handy.
When she occasionally offers Wally some,
he says, “Lord no, luv. I’m feelin’ fine and dandy.”"
The last two lines make me stumble.
Word choice:You chose fun words that really bring these two characters alive. I think it's what really, really makes this piece work.
Favorite line:
“Jeez, you’re a heartless bitch,
a man is in his death throes.
You’ll be sorry when I’m gone -
how you’ll manage, God only knows.”
Honest! The voice shines through in these lines.
Suggestions: Only suggestion is with the flow.
Finale Thoughts: Voice/style/tone of the piece really make this rock. The characters shine!
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Thank you for entering the K.I.S.S Poetry Contest!
Content: A dream with beautiful imagery.
Format/Flow:Format is nice. Flow for the most part works.
Word choice:I love your word choice here, it really brings out the imagery.
Favorite line:"with rain as large
and wet
as spider sized drops."
What an image!
Suggestions: You got a line or two that seems a bit long. A
line break might be needed to help with that flow but it's not enough to make me lower my rating.
Finale Thoughts:Nice imagery. The piece is simple. The images are simple. It just Simply works.
I hope that you enjoyed my thoughts on your piece!-Kat
Warned (E) Affected by her beauty, there's no escape #650981 by Eliot
My only hope is that this review teaches me something about the writer, helps the writer to improve, helps me to improve my own writing and encourages others to read the piece and give their valuable input.
My Five Basic Elements for Poetry :
IMAGERY, THEME, DISCOURSE, VOICE AND TONE-
Eliot, I was moved by the uniqueness of the imagery used in this piece. Your imagery and use of original phrasing allowed the theme of poem to come through without being forced. The tone and voice of the piece completely supported the theme and imagery and was felt all the way through.
RHYTHM-
I felt that the rhythm of this piece was just nicely done. The words fit together well and flowed nicely. Nothing was forced at all, it just went right along.
LINE BREAKS-
From the first reading of this piece I could feel the suspense and movement as I read it. The line breaks are PERFECT for me. Your use of enjambment really, really made this poem. Just a perfect way to keep me reading line after line and the pace it created and then it slowed down and picked up and it was just well done!
FIGURES OF SPEECH-
Your use of metaphors is also well done. After one of my readings of the piece I actually thought, "Is there any form of figures of speech in this???" they are just that well done.
WORD MUSIC-
From the moment that I read this piece I knew that there was word music in it, it was just musical and full of life. I read it out loud and listened to your reading and still couldn't figure out what it was. The indirect rhyme is just so subtle! I'm a bit rusty on this but I'm going to say...assonance? I'm hearing "mountains, outpaces" and "singing, pristine"... am I right? Either way, I know something is there and it's moving.
Overall,
Eliot, as you already know, I had complete fun with this piece. Every poem that I read just does something for me. I found four different reasons to consider this piece, in my opinion, a "great" poem.
It has certain qualities that I find admirable. It is short and simple and yet so moving. People don't seem to get that a piece doesn't have to be complicated and long in order to be emotional and moving.
It is a well-crafted and thought-out expression of language. The voice and tone, the discourse and line breaks and the word music and rhythm and how it all just goes together. It is just something that many can't do.
It reminds me of something else I really like-spoken poetry. I love to read poetry out loud and it is so easy to do it with this piece. I was so happy and proud of myself when I realized that the way I read it and said it out loud was the way you read it and said it out loud. I felt at that moment that I actually had understood something, that I had gotten it right. I always thought I knew it and understood it but now I know.
It moves me emotionally and physically. I blushed and at some point felt like I did something...naughty? Like I went some place I wasn't supposed to and was now trapped...but in the end it was soft and I liked being there. Eh, maybe it's just me but it seems to fit. I felt my lips moving to the piece. The pauses and pick ups and the lines that just whipped you around and rushed you through until you felt it too...the gasping and then the calm and the...delicate.
I guess that for me, in the end it's the movement that makes this a great poem.
I really loved this piece. I can see it on a birthday card for sure. I think you did a great job with getting the emotion through on this piece. I could find no errors at all and feel that it was overall just well written.
I was just wondering through your port and came across this piece!
I think you did a pretty good job on this piece. The tone and voice was great and I loved your style. You gave a lot of information and really brought me into the restaurant, peeking my interest.
I had a few issues, one being that the piece needed spacing for the paragraphs. I also found a few area's that tripped me up a bit.
"Yes, it was as delicious as it sounds, the chili and cheese that you couldn’t have thought got any meltier or it’d burn…. Melted in my mouth. "-- The first half of this actually trips up the reader and makes little sense. "couldn't have thought" seems to be the issue. I suggest "that you thought couldn't..."
Also, you have the ... after burn and then a period and then you have an incomplete sentence "Melted in my mouth.?" which is followed by a period and question mark.
Also, the intro is just too much and should be broken down. It's intimidating and did not draw me in. It's not until the talk about the restaurant that I actually want to read. In fact, I skipped that section. I would suggest trying to work that information into the piece and stead of listing it.
Also, the section about the hair really made me gag and made all the good things about the place go away, not even the comments coming after it made me want to go back to the place.
Like I said before, once getting past the list, your style, voice and the tone of the piece kept me reading, and I'm sure that the piece would keep others reading too.
Just wanted to give you a review! I came to this piece and I don't know why but I'm glad that I did. This really is good.
Instantly I was able to sing along...and it is blues! LOL. I love it and it works so well and you can actually feel it. I have no issues with it at all...well, just one. "Every day" should that be "everyday"?
I'm not sure but take a look at it just in case. Other than that, I really love this piece! Most of the times I read "lyrics" and just can't put music to them at all. Not in this case!
I wanted to give you a review. I saw this title and was instantly hooked. After reading the poem I completely understand how it ties in with the theme. Your tone and voice also support the theme and are so well done in this piece.
The repetition in this piece just rocks--I love it!
I thought the meter was pretty well done, only concern is in stanza four, but other than that the rhythm is great and has a musical flow to it.
The word music in here is also great, once again, love the repetition!
This piece works out really well and I'm glad to have picked it up.
I'm reviewing your review of "Pushing Daisies". I have heard of this show before but really didn't know much about it which is why I chose to read and review this piece.
I think that the writing is solid and your style is in place. I found no spelling, grammar or punctuation errors in this piece at all.
I do feel that you gave away too much of the story. I now know pretty much the whole back drop and what it's all about. I think that if I was given just selected amount of information I would have been more drawn into not only the piece but also the show.
With that set aside though, you really did write this well and put it together well. Great job!-Kat
My only hope is that this review teaches me something about the writer, helps the writer to improve, helps me to improve my own writing and encourages others to read the piece and give their valuable input.
NARRATIVE-
Exposition- All aspects of this story were clear and easy to understand. I was never left confused by plot or the dialogue.
Complication- The conflict that the main character had in this piece was very clear and presented very through his actions that describe his emotions.
Climax-I think that the climax was done well and not at all dragged out. It moved smoothly, wasn't too quickly and really kept the story going.
Resolution-The ending here was just classic. It was very real for me, the way she left the car, the thoughts that he had afterwards. I just thought the whole starbucks deal was right on the ball.
POV-
I think you picked a great POV for this story. I love the fact that I'm able to see inside of the characters head and it's all about him, not about her.
CHARACTERS-
Physical traits-You give good physical traits to your characters.
Dialogue-The dialogue was very much so real for me and moved the story.
Actions-Their actions where very real and believable.
Attire-You did a good job here too and it gave more insight to who the characters are.
Opinions- I think that the opinions of the main character really moved the story along.
Point of view-I think that the POV used really helped to define the characters in the story.
SETTING-
I feel that you really did describe the setting well. You gave a lot of visuals through sites, sounds and other areas. It helped to bring the world to life and I could really picture your characters in the car at night. I love the fact that you used the car as the setting. It really connects with the reader since it is a place that we most often think of when going through young love or a new romance.
THEME-
I think that the theme was really clear here. It was easy to find and remained constant through the piece. Really, the whole piece, plot, structure and all worked to support the theme.
STYLE AND TONE-
Your style and tone in this piece were pretty well done. I did feel that you could have used a bit less in the adjective department but it wasn't overly done. The POV really worked in this piece and I think the voice and style that you did it was perfect for it. Your wording worked and made the characters and piece believable.
This has been a fun and exciting piece to not only read but also review! I hope that my review has helped you tons (it’s helped me tons!) and I hope that it encourages you the readers to come on out, give your opinions and even read more of the work here in this port!
To all, I hope you have a great day that’s filled with tons of fun things to write, read, rate and review!-Kat
Theme-The theme in this piece is so well done. I was able to catch on without having it all in my face.
Form- The form used in this piece works so well.
Grammar-I could find no grammar or spelling issues in this piece at all.
Most Liked
"You look at me with terror in your eyes,
you say hold on, I am sorry, this is not your fate,
but unfortunately for me,
your apologies and awakening came much too late."
This last stanza is so powerful and touching. I loved it.
Suggestions-I felt that the rhyme was a little to out there and forced in some area's. I would have liked to have seen some different word choices.
Personal Thoughts-Overall I thought this was a touchy subject that you handled really well.
I hope you enjoyed hearing my opinion about the piece! If you have anymore questions please feel free to contact me! Hugs!-Kat
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.11 seconds at 9:03pm on Dec 25, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My only hope is that this review teaches me something about the writer, helps the writer to improve, helps me to improve my own writing and encourages others to read the piece and give their valuable input. 
It has certain qualities that I find admirable 
IMAGERY, THEME, DISCOURSE, VOICE AND TONE-
You know, I love simple poetry and I read this piece and loved it instantly. I came back to do a review and just was shocked at the low rating. I've sent this to people who just loved it to death and then when I mentioned the rating they too were shocked. One said, "I would be hurt to see such a low rating...and it captures the more abstract ideas of love very well". I have to agree and further more, I am hurt for you-this is just well done poetry.
I hope you have a great day that’s filled with tons of fun things to write, read, rate and review!-Kat 
Word choice:You got some powerful words here. You got alliteration and repetition going on here that really bring this piece to life.
Suggestions:I could find nothing to suggest here.
Finale Thoughts:You know, this piece really works for me. I love it, it flows, it feels honest and it speaks. I love the voice, I love the style, I love the tone and from start to finish, it stays simple and to the point.
NARRATIVE-
Exposition- All aspects of this story were clear and easy to understand. I was never left confused by plot or the dialogue.
