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Review of Golden Eyes  Open in new Window.
Review by KODA Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (2.5)
The beginning was confusing, there were not many specifications of who the characters were in relation to another. However, you did well in somewhat clearing up the beginning confusion with the events at the end of the story. The feelings of the characters are not as clear as I would like, but overall, everything was very vague. There was not much detail of what had happened to the character Francis other than the fact that her mother did something to her(?) It would do well for you to go in a bit more detail in something like this.
Vagueness is good only when there is enough evidence for the reader to conclude what may have happened. In this case, there was not much I as the reader could make from the scene other than the fact that something grave must have happened between Joanne and the mother for Francis to be shivering. Just not sure what. Things to improve on is the level of detail in the events, and clarification of the relationships between characters.
Other than that, I did enjoy the mood of the story. It was laid out nicely with the first paragraph pulling the reader in and questioning what had happened. It may have been albeit confusing, but intriguing nonetheless.
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