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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/merryberry
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14 Public Reviews Given
14 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of free  
Review by Ellen
Rated: E | (4.5)
Free,

Many people feel this way. Are doubtful about following their dreams for many reasons. Afraid of failing, what will people say. Only once a person gets past their ego and they stop worrying about what others think and just do what they want to do, then they are truly free. It takes a strong person to pursue their dreams and a person who have faith. We all have the right to live our dreams.
Your poem is well written, brings many different emotions to the surface and it also makes people think.

keep writing,
Ellen
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2
Review of My Poetry  
Review by Ellen
Rated: E | (4.5)
My Poetry,

Short, but very precise. Many times something can be said in a short poem better then a long poem. I do believe you have said it all. Very creative, well done,

keep writing,
Ellen
3
3
Review of Paranoia  
Review by Ellen
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Paranoia,

The poem is good, but I feel that you need to expand on it more. The first line, I am able to visualize you looking out the window. You feel apprehensive and it is obvious that you do not want to be seen. Makes me ask the questions, what or who are you afraid of? Who are the people from the car? Is it two men, two women? You leave a person with many questions. Why are those people there? Are they relatives coming to check on you? Are they strangers? Do you call the police for help? Do you pretend not to be home, even though they may have seen you at the window. I feel that the poem needs to have a tighter ending. Good luck to you.

Keep writing,
Ellen
4
4
Review of The Last Time  
Review by Ellen
Rated: E | (4.5)
Very interesting. I like the line about not going back to earth. I do not see that you mention what planet you are on or who you are actually fighting? Are you fighting the aliens that already live on the planet? How did you get there? Why did you go there? How many other people went with you? At first I thought you might be writing about something similar to the Civil War here on earth. You say that happened 15 years ago, so you did not make it back to earth? If not, then where are you and are you or others still fighting the aliens?
As you noticed, your story brings up many questions, but I liked your story. Makes a person think and there are so many different directions a person can pursue with this story. I guess you will just have to go with your feelings and go with your writing flow.

Keep writing,
Ellen
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