Love it. It may be because I have written many similar poems, or because I've felt those feelings myself one too many times. You've expressed some painful feelings quite nicely and I really liked how you portrayed the relationship.
However, the line 'Where I sit crying at our last rendezvous.' does not, in my opinion, go perfectly in that stanza. Also, I think you should write 'ear' instead of 'ears' in 'You were whispering sweet lies in her ears,' because you say you saw him with his new love..and it makes more sense you saw him saying something to her, whispering in her ear...it doesn't make much sense that he said one thing to one ear and then saying something else in her other ear and so on.
All in all, I believe it is a very good poem and I love it, revenge-plotting and everything.
Best wishes. Write on!
I really like your poem and its message!
There are many things that can bring people together, and your choice of both chocolate and coffee is delightful. In a perfect world, coffee would make this happen.
Best wishes! Write on!
I truly like your poem, I believe you did a great job.
Many fancy themselves the first at so many things, when there are others that have done it before them. One can see this in teenagers everywhere.
While I do believe it is a very good poem, I think there are a few things you might reconsider: you use a to- infinitive and a bare infinitive quite randomly, and since it follows the same structure (Not the first...), you might want to stick to one... As you did in the last-but-one stanza.
Best wishes and write on!
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Amazing :) I love it :) The rhythm and the flow of the poem make me want to re-read it out loud over and over again.
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