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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/molinara
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7 Public Reviews Given
12 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Molinara Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Squishy:

You write with an engaging style. The opening scene was credible in time and place, making it easy to visualize and suspend disbelief to be drawn in. The writing is concise with depth and texture.

I would suggest defining Skylie's problem/conflict and what is at stake sooner or at least allude to it.

Good read so far!

I invite you to submit a pitch for Diana at:

 The Elevator Pitch Open in new Window. (E)
You have 30 seconds to pitch your novel, screenplay, short story or concept. . . GO!
#1245304 by Molinara Author IconMail Icon


regards
Molinara
2
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Review of Cost of Beauty  Open in new Window.
Review by Molinara Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Color Me . . .

It's rather fitting that the google ads to your poem are:

'Discount Beauty - L'Oréal Official Site. Deals & Free Samples on Health & Beauty Products'

and

'Step-by-Step Tips from Cosmeticians Plus New Beauty Products & Offers www.shoppersdrugmart.ca'

This gives me an idea to create a writing challenge to mocks the ads that accompany it. Ha! Sorry I digress.

Regarding your 'L'Oréal Haiku'

The first thing that comes to mind is to juxtapose your verses to prose addressing the cost of inner beauty.

Ciao

Molinara
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