This is a wonderful contest Tay. Among the sea of activities and contests, this contest to demonstrate love and appreciation of our pets is welcome. I will happily make a donation toward it.
I really enjoyed your story,"Poolside Emabarrassment"! I absolutely identified with this story.
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Grammar: I found no grammatical errors
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Most Liked:I stayed in the pool and played with the others, not wanting to get out for fear that my bottoms would come off too. The guy ramped up his efforts to court me, and eventually I agreed to a date. That date was probably one of his most embarrassing moments, but I'll leave that story for another time.
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Suggestions: I have no suggestions for improvement
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Personal Thoughts: Just to share, I had a similarly embarrassing moment around the same age as you were at your "Moment in the sun".
I was in a mixed group of people, one of which was interested in me.
Being sort of shy, when something embarrassing was said, I tried to hide my flushed cheeks by tucking my face in my shirt as a turtle would retract into his shell. As that was a normal reaction for me, I pulled the shirt up. Before I realized it, I had unleashed further embarrassment upon myself. The elastic of the short top pulled easily over my breasts in my efforts to cover my face. Needless to say, I exposed myself to a room full of people.
The man whose interest I had piqued earlier became even more interested. We remained friends even after our "closer" relationship ended.
Thank you so much for this beautifully written story and bringing back some good/funny memories for me.
Write On!
Thank you,
Mari
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I really enjoyed your poem,"That's When Angels Dance"! From the title to the very last word, I enjoyed this.
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Grammar: There were no errors
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Most Liked: I love the whole thing, but to choose a favorite stanza I would choose this one because I really think all small things done for someone else are great to the person they are done for. Therefore there are no small kindnesses.
You helped another in need one day
"It was only a small thing" I heard you say
But these are the things for which angels pray
That's when the angels danced.
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Suggestions: I have no suggestions to improve on such a beautifully written piece.
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Personal Thoughts: Please keep writing! This was OUTSTANDING!
I came for a visit today and couldn't get past the folder before I had something to say. This is decidedly the most interesting folder organization I have seen yet. I ABSOLUTELY love it! Tremendously creative! This folder should serve as my example.
I really enjoyed your piece,"How To Be An A+ Teacher"!
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Grammar/Punctuation: I found no errors.
~*~ ~*~
Most Liked: I liked the whole thing but I really liked this line.
11. Care more than is safe for your emotional stability. The FDA doesn't regulate a raw, bleeding heart.
and this one.
17. Remember that it was written by stuffy, bespectacled intellectuals who never set a loafer-clad foot in a classroom.
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Suggestions: none
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Personal Thoughts: I was drawn to read this piece because my daughter is a teacher and ...Anyway, I thought it was delightful.
I really enjoyed your poem,"I Miss"! I love the emotion you express and that you included many individual things you miss about your Grandma.
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Grammar/Punctuation: The punctuation is inconsistent in this piece.
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Most Liked: I miss your hair, white and fluffy as clouds
I miss your bright smile, contagious as the common cold
I miss your heartfelt advice, which sometimes went unheeded
I miss your laid-back attitude about life
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Suggestions: Punctuate consistently.
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Personal Thoughts: There are two schools of thought regarding punctuation in poetry. But you can't have it both ways.
You very decidedly are a talented writer!I look forward to reading more of your work.
I think this is a marvelous idea for a forum. I bet this will become extremely popular. I'm going to add it to my contest to help you get it off the ground for you. I think this is one of the best ideas I have seen on WDC.
Honest to goodness, if there is anything I can do to help you, please let me know.
I read you poem entitled "Get rid of your somedays". If you wrote this at age 13 you were well above your age in maturity with this piece of poetry. It is a good way of looking at things.
People on WDC will give their opinions about your work if you want them to or not. That is part of the reason for this site...someone reviews and is reviewed in return. The critiques help both the reviewed and the reviewer. The aim is to help each other grow. A suggestion would be for you to place a restriction on it(in the editing area).
I was just wandering around the halls of WDC and ducked into your shop. How wonderful these C-Notes are. I like the humor in them. I have marked this in my favorites file. See you soon...well, I'll talk to you soon.
Oh how beautifully you've expressed one of the deepest sorrows of a woman's heart. If this is a personal story, my heart goes out to you.
My favorite:
I dream in color, isn't that rather strange?
Your dark brown eyes vividly can change
to a hazel-like hue that haunts my mind;
memories of you are perfectly defined.
This sounds like it is going to be quite a fascinating book. Sounds as though there are going to be some interesting adventures. I like the characters you have already begun to acquaint me with in your prologue.
The last two sentences seem to be warring with each other.
As several agents of the Imperium track his every step.. My thought is if you began the last sentence with the word "Several" instead of As several...it would solve the conflict.
I found no other errors.
I am looking forward to reading the rest of the story.
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Suggestions: If you go into the "edit" portion of this piece, you can put the title "A Memory of Spring". You can leave the description as it is or add that this is a free verse poem.
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Theme: Contest entry with a prompt. Exceptionally well done.
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Grammar: of course there are no errors.
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Most Liked:
However, these tears are hot and thick
Globs of murky gray that burn like acid
Forcing the experts to make their predictions
Else the masses come to their own conclusions.
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Personal Thoughts: I like how you wove the gray rain story of doomsday.
962569 Poetry's Prism~Weekly Contest [Rated: 18+]
By: Tammy~Catchin Up~
The contest ID is 962569
Thank you for entering "Poetry's Prism~Weekly Contest". I am Mari and am honored to be the guest judge for the week.
Dear wolfSinger,
I read your entry for Poetry's Prism: "A Pet's Kid"
My First Impressions: Very Cute!
When the kid first found the gate,and the water, I worried. I was confused by the "former sand" part. Then I felt relief as the kid ran into the house. The next stanza had me chuckling because my dog huffs at me and rolls her eyes when I disturb her. Then in the last part of this piece you had me surprised with a pet should never own a kid.
My Favorite: That is hard to say.
Comments: Absolutely adorable. Well written. Flow and meter was smooth.
I read your entry for Poetry Prism: "A Pixie Wonderland"
First reaction: Very poetic, if you'll excuse the term. Your word choice is wonderful...yon vale. The story you tell of the Pixies is a picture well told. I can see the Pixies dancing and playing along the enchanted banks to the tune of the river.
This is a really cool poem. I do not say that in its most simple meaning. I enjoyed how you brought the grey silkshawl over my shoulders. Of couse your description of the sun splintering off the frozen gems...nice
My favorite part is the last...fairy dust sprinkled by Peter Pan over Wendy...I enjoyed the read.
Your friendship poem is very sweet. There are so many facets of a friend. Its hard to put it into words. You have given your friend a lovely gift.
Welcome to WDC. You will find lots of things to do. Most everyone on this site are ready to offer help in improving each others work. You willdiscover this is such a wonderfully positive site. Reviewing others work is a growing/learning experience.
Write on!
Mari
I can feel your heart through this poetic Tribute to your dad. Job well done!
My favorite part:
When the rising sun reveals its grace
And the world is enshrouded by its heavenly embrace
When the curtain of darkness is replaced by day
Then the silent soul inwardly says
"I think of you"
I found no obvious errors.
Thank you for sharing.
Mari
This is quite a powerfully written piece. You echo my very thoughts in some places and give a name to others.
I found no obvious errors technically.
My favorite part:
Sad sight, so many flags draped over coffins never seen.
The sinister lies that filled them burried deep beneath such patriotic sheen.
Human losses well disguised, and media filtered from our collective eyes,
By corporate puppet leaders, whose agendas we must now despise.
Thank you,
Mari
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Her personality is well executed as is her revenge.