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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/neverwhere9
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Review by neverwhere9 Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is for the most part very good. There are a few run on sentences and mistakes in grammar that detract from the story. I'm sure if you proofread it one more time you would find them and fix them. Also, I feel like with the way the story begins and carries on for so long, it should be about the computer's positive influence on the narrator's daughter's life, rather than a story about a woman's gradually warming feelings towards computers.
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