Wow! This poem spoke to my shy heart. Just earlier today my dad and I went to visit an old friend... long story short, the old friend and my dad did 99% of the talking. But they were kind enough to not say anything about my quietness. They've gotten used to it.
Hi,
I liked your idea of writing about a creek you remembered. I often recall things of the past in a nostalgic way.
BUT...your diction was a bit off. And I'm not sure what you meant when you said, "...he sat in the bushes with a braless blonde..." Obviously you meant she was braless. I just thought that was a bit...dirty.
Overall it was at best only a fair piece. Keep trying!
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