more I - more, I

move and – move, and

something to extraordinary - something extraordinary

with is woman - with this woman

me, and – no comma

head and - head, and

furniture and - furniture, and

eyes and - eyes, and

usual and - usual, and

station, the - station; the

bird he – bird, he

blind he - blind, he

arm the - arm, the

over, “What – over. “What

glares, “It’s – glares. “It’s

eyebrow, “Was – eyebrow. “Was

grins, “Hey, - grins. “Hey,

I would suggest to leave only one space between paragraphs.

the scientist - the scientists

head she - head; she

residence here - residents here

bicycle up – bicycle, up

controlled and – controlled, and

power was - power were

“’Fraid - “'Fraid

in melee. - in the melee.

sure?” she - sure?” She

as threw – the subject is missing.

Kira!" He - Kira!" he

it than - it then

"Done, But - "Done, but

easy" He – easy," he

way of the shot of the shot of a - way of the shot of a

life" A - life," a

"K...get back" – "K … get back."

back!" He - back!" he

this but - this, but

die I'll - die, I'll

of the railing - off the railing

tower." He - tower," he

stop you" - stop you."

me, You – me. You

me but - me, but

you want" - you want."

fine, Let's – fine. Let's

home" I - home." I

he menu - the menu

from he - from the

This is a story you could easily expand into a longer one.

Leave a space between paragraphs for easier reading.

clamed around - clamped around

Pandora!" The - Pandora!" the

She answered – new paragraph. - With every change of speaker start a new paragraph.

navigator, "Mr. - navigator. "Mr.

journal, and – no comma

silent, and – no comma

well, and – no comma

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

students, he - students; he

air." Anri, - air," Anri,

with." She - with," she

relax." Anri - relax," Anri

will- well, - will - well,

to." Pepper - to," Pepper

nervously, Anri - nervously; Anri

on students – on, students

She teased. - she teased.

Anri, once - Anri; once

meet once - met once

control, I - control; I

inside she - inside, she

fault." She - fault," she

so tha-" - so tha--"

expelled." He - expelled," he

fault, you - fault; you

understand?" He - understand?" he

place, you - place; you

about?" She - about?" she

well." Anri - well," Anri

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attack she – attack, she

trout, her - trout; her

string she - string, she

arrow, the - arrow; the

Fiona!” her - Fiona!” her

voice, she – voice; she

look, they - look; they

jacket the - jacket was the

marks, his - marks; his

shape, after - shape; after

know” he - know.” He

“What..how?... huh?!” - “What … how? ... huh?!”

you don't think - you think

and agrees - and agreed

“Ok Fi.., that - “Ok Fi ..., that

boots, he - boots; he

bridge, he pulled - bridge, pulled

forward and leaped – forward, and leapt

Fiona puts - Fiona put

he had tossed - he tossed

bank, a - bank; a

anything!” he - anything!” He

me, I’m - me; I’m

you want” - you want.”

away, I - away; I

know then - know, then

day, Paladin - day; Paladin

action, he - action; he

help, I - help; I

message, I’ll - message; I’ll

pub, I - pub; I

business If - business. If

blue ,and - blue, and

to being living - to living

up, he - up; he

ankles, it - ankles; it

red, he - red; he

back, one - back; one

lurch, the - lurch; the

now Machines - now, Machines

machines, not – machines; not

ears.” he - ears.” He

booth he – booth, he

me, I’ll – me; I’ll

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I would suggest to leave only one space between paragraphs.

starts but three - starts three

trail and - trail, and

What of – this sentence could be deleted.

h start; - start; - this sentence belongs to the previous paragraph.

couple miscellaneous - couple of miscellaneous

name if - name of

and stirs - and steered – compound predicate – pulled and steered

prong him - prong he

to the – to, the

on side - one side

hold the - hold, the

boy," and so a - boy." A

occupation captain - occupation, captain

beard and - beard, and

Regis and - Regis, and

side, Keith - side; Keith

three so - three, so

post he - post, he

watchmen- no - watchmen - no

damsels and – damsels, and

damsel Henry – damsel, Henry

Henry the - Henry spent the

imagined triumph. - imagine triumph.

side he – side, he

up, Henrys – up; Henry's

see. He - see, he

lantern, its – lantern; its

head and - head, and

Henry and that smacked - Henry and smacked

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

I suggest leaving a space between paragraphs for easier reading.

captive were - captive was

that,” Ryden - that.” Ryden

“Sh-Shaan?” she - “Sh-Shaan?” She

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blankets feet - blankets, feet

outside and - outside, and

sleep I - sleep, I

blonde. - blonde hair.

do, they - do; they

everything. the - everything. The

tones and - tones, and

paperwork, I - paperwork; I

asked, they - asked; they

expected, I've - expected; I've

stick out, now - stick out; now

sanctuary I - sanctuary, I

advertisement trying – advertisement, trying

illnesses by - illnesses, by

office but – office, but

saying "I'm – saying, "I'm

me but at - me, but at

me but it's - me, but it's

wonder how – wonder, how

"Hello...are – "Hello … are

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

I would suggest to leave a space between paragraphs for easier reading.

mankind , since - mankind , since

power each - power, each

planet, however even - planet; however, even

numbers their - numbers, their

vain and - vain, and

zodiacs and - zodiacs, and

" Ophiuchus ". - "Ophiuchus."

DNA . - DNA.

body , they - body, they

battles instead they - battles; instead, they

world , someone - world, someone

arrived, one - arrived; one

place." Your - place, "Your – the dialogue needs to be on the same line.

power, you - power; you

strength that - strength; that

least so - least, so

incomplete they - incomplete, they

body but - body, but

it , all - it, all

barren , a - barren, a

void Echoes - void, Echoes

created , Echoes - created. Echoes

my name - My name

echo , born - echo, born

number . - number.

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

box, "Thank - box. "Thank

3 years - three years – for numbers less than ten, spell them out.

years we - years, we

wound the - wound, the

the effected - the affected

people but - people, but

line the - line, the

John new - John knew

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Why would any one from the future be interested in an obscure corrupt politician? I think the impact of the story could be stronger.

implants that was under - implants under

you that would – delete “that”

"Dangerous?" the - "Dangerous?" The

he worn - he wore

Foster," Valentine – Foster." Valentine

psychologist, I'm – psychologist; I'm

Maxim and - Maxim, and

1995." Maxim – 1995," Maxim

Suddenly the - Suddenly, the

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Her costumer – do you mean customer?

“One”, he - “One,” he

http://www.be-a-better-writer.com/punctuate-dialog...

please”, she – please.” She

moon shined - moon shone

prowled, and – no comma

coachman sad - coachman sat

arose at - arose on

sounded husk - sounded husky

The hoof sound of the horses - The sound of the horses' hooves

and entered. - and enter.

Inside a - Inside was a

performed phlebotomy - performed a phlebotomy

to grain – to ground

Three years later – one thing you can do to indicate this is an account of a true story is the make the end of your story in the precious paragraph. You can use extra spaces or **** then start this paragraph: Author's note: three years later

not stopping - no stopping

reflecting he - reflecting, he

again he - again, he

was...the - was … the

HE and - He and – something is missing here.

"No." Chad whispered. "just – "No," Chad whispered, "just

me." He - me," he

head and - head, and

was beginning – since she was shot “was continuing” makes better sense.

head and - head, and

scene as - scene; as

up a - up, a

gurney, Ben - gurney; Ben

sheet and - sheet, and

hospital." The - hospital," the

dead." Ben - dead," Ben

sure that he – delete “that”

dead...wait - dead … wait

afternoon and - afternoon, and

"Fine." Ben – "Fine," Ben

Grate seemingly - Grate, seemingly

galaxy was - galaxy, was

working and - working, and

in an out - in and out

expendable but – expendable, but

old but – old, but

“Its on its - “It's on its

parties and – parties, and

ended I - ended, I

chocolate," Cam - chocolate." Cam

run due . - run due.

Relief .." - relief ..."

fridge." Becky - fridge," Becky

saltines the - saltines; the

log." Cam - log," Cam

tonight." she - tonight." She

giggled, "Let's - giggled. "Let's

silently, "Where – silently. "Where

Moon, - Moon.

mate; without - mate, without

farm." Cam - farm," Cam

question, " We – question. "We

evil?" she - evil?" She

down her. - down at her.

She as - She was

Gods." he – Gods," he

mate, "By – mate. "By

Sacramento, our – Sacramento; our

closely I - closely, I

saw that they – delete “that”

war…probably – war … probably

leaves and – leaves, and

hand and - hand, and

me he - me, he

out, you - out; you

the ”Lost Battalion? - the Lost Battalion?”

I would suggest to use the dash sparingly.

houses- hopefully - houses – hopefully – same for the other dashes in the paragraph.

job, people – job; people

something and – something, and

package, and – no comma

flown on were - flown were

tree, and – no comma

tea, or – no comma

bag. Closed - bag, closed

me and - me, and

all follow - all followed

And in – leave space between paragraphs.

song..."sugar - song... "sugar

time" I - time." I

to remove the sugar - the removal of the sugar

happy we – happy, we

fruits and – fruits, and

hard and - hard, and

red was - red, was

husband and – husband, and

died, in fact, - died; in fact,

favorite and - favorite, and

on face – on her face

guise.Elisha – guise. Elisha

mole, that – no comma

ticking and – ticking, and

acknowledgement he – acknowledgement, he

face, she – face; she

in, had – no comma

"Ellie honey – leave space between paragraphs.

late", shouted – late," shouted

honey?", continued - honey?" continued

"No, I didn't.", said - "No, I didn't," said – also with a change of speaker, there is a new paragraph.

husband and - husband, and

her and - her, and

alright?", said - alright?" said

"Oh yes, - new paragraph

wonderful?", mustered – no comma

to office, - to the office,

Elisha!", beamed - Elisha!" Beamed

"Morning Kellie, - new paragraph

huh", replied – huh," replied

again, it – again; it

would be her - would her

for certainty - for certain

know whats - know what's

that", announced – that," announced