Very good. When you said you took a different view, I didn't get it at first. You suprised me with Mat being an automated transport. It ended well. It has me thinking of many things. Imagine having all of man's hopes and dreams, but also his frailties. Then being alone for a billion years. It is a nightmare. I wonder if a self-aware machine could go insane?
That was a great story. You have incredible writing talent. I'm an aspiring writer and after reading your work I can see how much I have to learn. Technically, the story was excellent. It was solid, concise, and had a good flow. Your imagery was good. I was left wanting more. That is the sign of great writing. You have a very bright future as a writer.
I enjoyed your piece. It seems that you were writing from a deep personal experience. I read it three times and I kept seeing new things. Techinically it was good. Keep up the good work.
I have only been on "Writing.Com" for a week, and I'm considered a newbie, but as an aspiring writer, I can tell you that this is the place to be. I've spent hours reading some of the established author's work. I've been focusing on sentence structure, punctuation, and the flow of the stories. There are many excellent writers who are members of this web site. I have posted five stories so far. I've gotten some good reviews and some not so good reviews. What I will say is the review process is fantastic. I've been given some honest appraisals, which have put me on the road to improving my writing skills. I want to learn where I need to improve my writing. It may be painful, but It will make me a better writer. I can honestly say that I have work to do. But, that's okay. I've made a good start. Keep the reviews coming, but please be gentle. I am were you once were. Thank you "Writing.Com and all the reviewers.
Very clever. It seems you have an insight on life far beyond your years. it appears that you put alot of yourself , and how you feel into your writing. You should do really well in college. I like the way you added the word desperate in your verse. Keep writing. If you work hard, you could have a bright future.
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