Your witty narrative and descriptive language create a mood that is no longer found in the novels and stories of today. The slang, expressions, and descriptions create a dark brooding atmosphere and although I'm sure there will be comparisons to the great crime authors of days gone by I felt this was unique and your own. I don't know why but Charley when I picture him, has a rumpled Columbo vibe. Also, his inability to make a decision about a romantic interest makes him more likable and genuine. The story's appeal was the feeling that the main character was talking directly to me. I saw myself as a reporter getting a story from a reliable but unnamed source. Nevertheless, your skill and talent shine brightly and I am looking forward to reading more of your work.
The best things in life are simple. You have shared your feelings with the reader outlining what is important to you. A strong reminder that life does not have to be complicated and distracting when we focus on the pure joy and wonderful gifts that surround us every day. Your piece creates a mood relating to discovery and is a reminder to never abandon the child within. The only thing I might suggest and it is just a little niggle is that you might want to make the lines more even to create more rhythm and flow.
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