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1
1
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
This essay does a thorough job of examining the reasons behind writers' concerns about AI. It breaks down several key arguments, from job security to the quality of AI-generated work, and goes into depth on why people feel threatened by AI's rise. However, there are some areas where the essay could be improved.

First, the overall tone comes across as somewhat condescending, particularly in how it addresses writers’ fears. While the point about job security and resistance to change is valid, dismissing those concerns as "kicking, screaming, and complaining" doesn't fully engage with the emotional and creative stakes involved in writing. Writers have legitimate concerns about AI encroaching on creative spaces where human emotion, experience, and nuance are critical. AI might be able to automate content, but it can't replicate the emotional depth or cultural context that human writers often infuse into their work.

Second, the section on the jobs at risk of automation feels like it goes off-topic. While it's useful to point out that writers aren't the only profession facing disruption, the lengthy list of unrelated jobs could be cut down to maintain the focus on writing and creativity. The essay would benefit from diving deeper into how AI might impact different types of writing beyond just routine journalism and content creation. What does this mean for novelists, poets, or screenwriters, for example?

The essay could also explore the idea of AI as a tool rather than a replacement. Many writers might not be opposed to AI but could be open to using it in a way that enhances their creative process. By painting AI as a threat rather than a potential collaborator, the essay limits the conversation. It might be more productive to discuss how AI could be integrated into a writer’s workflow in a supportive rather than antagonistic way.

Overall, the essay is informative and raises good points, but it could benefit from a more balanced tone and deeper exploration of the complexities of writing as an art form that goes beyond just economic concerns.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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2
2
Review of Review Template  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your review gives a great sense of your personal approach to critiquing and how seriously you take the process. I like that you compare canned templates to bland vegetables—it's a strong metaphor that makes your stance on personalized feedback clear. It’s clear you put a lot of thought into understanding the writer's background and goals before diving into the mechanics of the piece. That’s a respectful approach because it shows you’re not just critiquing for the sake of it but trying to offer something meaningful.

What stands out is your attention to detail and willingness to invest time into multiple readings of the work. This shows dedication, which any writer would appreciate. Also, your focus on understanding different genres and mechanics shows that you’re still evolving as a reviewer and writer yourself. That humility adds depth to your reviews because it makes it feel like a learning experience for both you and the writer.

You mention a little insecurity about people not replying to your reviews, which I think is something many people can relate to. It’s a vulnerable moment in your writing that humanizes you, showing you're invested in the art and eager to engage in meaningful conversations about it. At the same time, I think it’s good that you're aware that not everyone will respond—and you’ve made peace with that, even if it still stings a bit.

Overall, this piece effectively communicates your dedication, sincerity, and thoughtfulness as a reviewer. It’s engaging and gives potential writers a clear picture of what they’re in for if they request feedback from you. Nice job!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)






*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
3
3
Review of Chapter 28  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This passage dives deep into dark, supernatural themes, blending elements of occultism and personal struggle in a mystical, almost post-apocalyptic setting. Anna’s role as a protector in a haunted environment is compelling, especially with her emotional ties to other characters like Sam, Jennifer, and the sinister figure of Harold Morgan.

The opening immediately sets a grim tone, with the “tainted skies” and the rise of covens suggesting a world in turmoil. You create a distinct sense of foreboding, which works well with the gothic elements scattered throughout the piece, like the inverted crucifix and the chapel scene. These details add layers of dread and mystery, maintaining suspense.

Anna’s emotional arc is well woven into the story. Her affection for Sam, combined with her inner conflict and the burden of keeping secrets, makes her a more complex character. The flashbacks to a pivotal event 20 years prior help give context to her current predicament, hinting at the deep scars of that night. However, there’s a sense that this backstory could be expanded upon to help clarify the importance of those moments and their direct connection to the current events. For example, what exactly happened 20 years ago, and why is Harold Morgan’s return so significant?

One thing to note is that the pacing feels uneven at times. For instance, the sudden shift from Anna’s quiet search of the chapel to the appearance of Harold Morgan could benefit from a bit more build-up. Slowing down the confrontation, perhaps with more focus on Anna’s internal dread as she realizes she’s not alone, might increase the tension even further.

The end sequence—Anna trudging through ruins, hunting for torches and spells—feels appropriately desolate, hinting at the larger quest or battle to come. It leaves the reader with questions about Katherine’s children and the role they might play, which works well for a cliffhanger.

Overall, the writing is atmospheric, rich with symbolism and dark magic. A little more detail on the relationships and past events would provide more clarity, but the piece succeeds in capturing a haunting and emotionally charged story.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
4
4
Review of Chapter 39  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This story does a good job of blending internal thoughts and external actions, as you’re aiming for. The tension between Alex and Karen is palpable, especially in the way they speak and react to one another. The dialogue feels natural, and it effectively conveys the emotional undertones of their relationship—especially Alex's concern and Karen’s more aloof attitude.

One thing that works well is how the story hints at a larger mystery involving Trina, Jasmine, and Sabrina, as well as the synagogue and Karen's shift in behavior. These elements build intrigue without giving everything away too quickly, making the reader want to know more. The subtle reference to "the thirst for power" suggests something darker going on, which adds a layer of complexity to Karen's character.

However, there are some areas where the story could be more concise or clearer. For example, the sentence “Actions that'd affirmed sentiments the other now understood” feels a bit awkward and could be rephrased for clarity. Something like, “Their actions had affirmed feelings they both finally understood” might read more smoothly. Also, Alex’s reaction to Karen’s detachment could be deepened by showing more of his internal conflict—maybe adding a moment where he second-guesses his loyalty or feels torn between love and frustration.

Overall, the story is compelling and leaves room for further development. You’ve set up a lot of interesting dynamics and mysteries that could be explored more in future scenes.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
5
5
Review of Toddlerfurs  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your characters for "Toddlerfurs" are well thought out, and they each have unique traits that could make your story engaging, especially with the dynamic between them. Here’s a review with some feedback on each character and a few suggestions to refine their development: Conner Wooloom Conner is a likable and relatable protagonist. His combination of bravery and fear makes him a well-rounded character. The detail about him not wanting to show his diapers is a nice touch that adds depth to his personality, showing that even young characters can have insecurities. To improve his character, you might want to explore how his fears play into the plot. Maybe he faces challenges that force him to confront these fears, showing growth over time. Wyatt Striptail Wyatt’s contrasting personality to Conner’s is a good choice—it sets up a classic dynamic of the cautious friend trying to hold back the adventurous one. However, since Wyatt is often cowardly, it might be interesting to show moments where he unexpectedly shows bravery, surprising both Conner and the reader. Maya and Chelsea Hoppity Maya and Chelsea are a great duo, and their contrasting personalities add a lot to the story. Maya is beautiful, kind, and girly, while Chelsea is curious, friendly, and hyperactive. However, they both share a love of adventure, which could lead to some interesting conflicts between them. Angel Heartping Angel is a well-developed antagonist. Her bratty, spoiled nature makes her a perfect foil for Conner and his friends. To further develop her character, you might explore her relationships with her parents and how they contribute to her personality. Kip Bearstunne Kip is a well-rounded character who adds a lot to the story. He’s cool, well-skilled, brave, smart, kind, active, and protective. To further develop his character, you might explore his relationships with his family and friends and how they contribute to his personality.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
6
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Review of Love's Embrace  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This piece offers a poetic exploration of love, portraying it as a powerful and multifaceted force. The repetition of "Love is" at the beginning of the lines helps to emphasize the different dimensions of love—truth, desire, caring, and respect. These qualities are presented as the result of years of dedication, suggesting that love is something that grows and deepens over time through shared experiences and mutual effort.

The imagery in the poem is strong, particularly with the metaphor of love as a "fledgling seed, born of Earth, but nurtured in the Highest Heavens." This suggests that while love may begin in a simple or humble way, it has the potential to grow into something extraordinary, supported by a higher, almost divine, force. The idea of love having "indomitable strength" and "willful desires" further reinforces its powerful nature, implying that once love takes root, it is unstoppable and unmatched.

The poem captures the essence of love as both a spiritual and earthly experience, blending human emotions with a sense of something greater. It could resonate deeply with readers who have experienced or aspire to a love that is both intense and enduring.

However, the poem might benefit from a bit more concrete imagery or examples that could make the abstract concepts more relatable. For instance, mentioning specific moments or actions that illustrate "deepest caring and respect" or "striving, passion, and achievements" could help ground the poem in real-life experiences, making it even more impactful.

Overall, the poem is a heartfelt and thoughtful reflection on the nature of love, successfully conveying its depth and complexity. With a little more specificity, it could connect even more powerfully with the reader.


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7
7
Review of How I Became Sum1  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your story, How I Became Sum1, has a charming and nostalgic vibe that makes it relatable. The way you trace your journey from a simple game username to an acronym with a fun twist is engaging and humorous. The blend of personal history and light-hearted creativity in naming your “family” gives the piece a unique touch.

The beginning sets a casual tone, making it easy for readers to connect with your experience on Pogo and WDC. The choice to use “Sum1” across different platforms shows consistency and gives your online persona a sense of continuity. It’s interesting how something as simple as a username can evolve into a symbol of identity and self-expression.

You’ve effectively conveyed that you’re not trying to be the best or most famous writer but just someone who enjoys the craft and helping others. This humility makes the piece relatable and endearing. The humorous twist with your family members' names adds a playful element that lightens the tone and keeps the reader engaged.

However, to enhance readability, consider breaking up the long paragraphs into shorter ones. This will make the piece easier to follow and give each idea a bit more space to breathe. Additionally, you might want to expand on the poem that inspired the acronym to give readers more context.

Overall, this piece is a delightful reflection on how something as simple as a username can become an integral part of your identity. It’s both personal and fun, making it an enjoyable read.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
8
8
Review of Remembering You  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your poem carries a lot of emotional weight, which is essential when dealing with themes like love, loss, and remembrance. The structure you’ve chosen, with its ABBA rhyme scheme in the first stanza and an ABAB in the second, works well to create a sense of continuity while also capturing the shift from mourning to finding traces of the loved one in nature.

Strengths:

Emotional Depth: The poem effectively conveys a deep sense of love and loss. The imagery of the loved one’s essence being found in natural elements—wind, water, stars, sun, and moon—creates a powerful connection between the spiritual and the physical world.

Imagery: You use vivid and relatable imagery that helps readers visualize and feel the presence of the loved one, especially in lines like “I feel your essence in the wind's embrace” and “I see your soul in the sun's shining beam.”

Flow: The poem has a nice rhythm, especially in the second stanza. The smooth transition from one natural element to another helps in maintaining the emotional tone without any abrupt changes.

Areas for Improvement:

Clichés: Some phrases, like "essence in the wind's embrace" and "soul in the sun's shining beam," though beautiful, are commonly used in poetry dealing with loss. You might consider finding more unique ways to express these ideas to make the poem more distinct.

Consistency in Tone: The first stanza introduces the loss with a tragic tone, but the transition to the second stanza, which focuses on finding the loved one in nature, might benefit from a stronger bridge. Perhaps a line or two acknowledging the ongoing pain while also introducing the comfort found in these natural signs could help smooth this transition.

Rhyming: While the rhyme scheme is consistent, some of the rhymes, like "wrong" and "belong," feel a bit forced. You might experiment with different word choices or structures to maintain the flow without compromising the meaning.

Overall, the poem is a touching tribute to a lost loved one. With a few tweaks, it could become even more powerful and unique, deepening the emotional connection for your readers.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
9
9
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem captures the devastating imagery of a dam failure with a rhythmic, almost haunting quality. The repetition in each stanza reinforces the inevitability of the disaster, which makes the poem feel urgent and tragic. The use of simple, yet powerful, language adds to its impact.

The first stanza sets the scene, with the "pressure building" and "cracks developing," which creates a sense of impending doom. The line "No one watches the water flow" suggests negligence or ignorance, making the disaster seem even more tragic as it hints at preventable circumstances.

The second stanza vividly describes the destructive force of the water once the dam breaks. The imagery of houses "tumble like bowling pins" is particularly striking, as it conveys the sheer force and suddenness of the flood. The phrase "Woe -- no one wins" serves as a somber reflection on the universal loss that such disasters bring.

The final stanza drives home the human cost of the tragedy. The image of "two thousand dead, beneath the cross" is chilling, tying the disaster to a real historical event, likely the Johnstown Flood of 1889. This gives the poem a sense of gravitas and historical resonance.

Overall, the poem effectively conveys the horror of a natural disaster through its concise and rhythmic structure. The repetition and imagery work together to evoke a powerful emotional response, making it a memorable and impactful piece.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)






*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
10
10
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This quote seems to be about humility and the unpredictable nature of miracles or divine intervention. The idea is that when something miraculous or unexpected happens, like causing a "shout of joy," it’s important not to let it go to your head. The phrase "do not get puffed up" suggests that you shouldn’t become arrogant or overly proud because the event is not due to your own doing.

The second part, "I am clothed in mystery and my ways are inexplicable," emphasizes that miracles or divine actions are beyond human understanding. They come from a place that we can't fully grasp, so there’s no point in trying to take credit for them or even fully understand them.

Overall, the advice seems to be about maintaining humility and recognizing that there are forces or events beyond our control that should be respected and not used to boost our egos. It’s a reminder to stay grounded even when something extraordinary happens.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
11
11
Review of Makes Sense  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem, titled "Strange Bird," carries a haunting and mysterious tone, leaving much unsaid and open to interpretation. The imagery of a man "pecking about the dead grass" and "wrestling chores with naked feet in the gallows of Winter" paints a vivid picture of someone isolated and struggling against harsh, possibly unforgiving circumstances. The word "gallows" especially adds a dark, ominous feel, as if this character is dealing with a fate or burden that's almost suffocating.

The short line "so many questions" seems to be a turning point in the poem. It reflects the speaker's confusion and curiosity about this strange man's behavior. It also invites the reader to wonder along with them—what has this man been through, and why is he living this way?

The introduction of the fiancée adds a new layer of depth to the poem. Her statement that "he never showed for the wedding" hints at a tragic or mysterious backstory. Perhaps this man was once engaged to be married but, for some reason, didn't follow through. This raises more questions: Did something happen to him? Did he disappear? Is the man in the poem the same person, now changed beyond recognition?

The poem's brevity is one of its strengths. It leaves much to the reader's imagination, allowing them to fill in the gaps with their own thoughts and emotions. The language is simple yet evocative, and the abrupt ending leaves a lingering sense of unease. Overall, "Strange Bird" is a compelling piece that draws the reader in with its mystery and leaves them pondering the story behind the strange man and his fate.


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12
12
Review of Chapter 7  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your story offers an intriguing blend of suspense, character interactions, and hints of a larger, more mysterious narrative. The way you've written Sabrina's experiences with her nightmares and her interactions with other characters creates a strong sense of unease and curiosity. Here are some thoughts and suggestions:

Character Development: Sabrina is presented as a complex character, struggling with inner turmoil and a mysterious connection to her nightmares. This sets her up as someone the reader wants to know more about. However, her emotions could be deepened further. For instance, rather than simply noting that she was panicked when hearing the thump, you could explore her thoughts or physical reactions to make the reader feel her anxiety.

Dialogue: The conversations flow well and reveal a lot about the characters. However, some exchanges could benefit from more subtlety. For example, when Tatum asks, “Is everything alright?” and Sabrina responds, “Fine,” it feels a bit straightforward. Perhaps Sabrina could deflect the question or change the subject more evasively, reflecting her reluctance to share her true feelings.

Scene Transitions: The story jumps between different scenes and characters, which adds variety, but sometimes it feels a bit abrupt. When moving from one scene to another, consider adding brief descriptions or thoughts from the character whose perspective you're focusing on to smooth the transition. This can help keep the reader grounded in the narrative.

Pacing: The pacing is generally good, but some moments could be tightened or expanded upon. For instance, the scene where Luis notices Sabrina could be expanded with more internal thoughts or a more vivid description of his reaction. On the other hand, the details about the other students and the “sisterhood” could be slightly condensed to maintain focus on the main plot.

Mystery and Suspense: You've done a great job of introducing elements of mystery with Sabrina's connection to her nightmares and the intrigue surrounding the sisterhood. This is the story’s strength, and you should continue to build on it. For example, you could drop more subtle hints about the significance of Sabrina's birthmark or the true nature of her connection to the sisterhood.

Setting and Atmosphere: The setting is described well enough to give the reader a sense of place, but there are opportunities to enhance the atmosphere. The scenes could be more immersive with descriptions that engage all five senses. For example, instead of just noting that Sabrina is in the kitchen, you could mention the smell of coffee or the sound of birds outside to draw the reader into the scene.

Overall, you have the foundation of an engaging story with a strong main character and an intriguing plot. By deepening the emotional and sensory details and ensuring smooth transitions between scenes, you can enhance the reader's connection to the story and keep them invested in the unfolding mystery.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
13
13
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This piece is rich in nostalgia and captures the essence of a memorable teacher, David Rath, with vivid detail and a touch of humor. The narrative paints a picture of a man who was more than just a high school English teacher; he was a charismatic figure, almost mythic in his ability to captivate and inspire his students.

The story's strength lies in its detailed characterization of Mr. Rath. The descriptions of his modest gray tie, tweed jacket with leather elbow patches, and the way he carried himself create a clear visual image of a man who exuded a particular brand of intellectual coolness. The contrast between his debonair exterior and the vulnerable story he shares about his Junior Prom humanizes him and deepens the reader's connection to him.

The dialogue and pacing are well-executed, particularly during the retelling of the prom story. The shift from the students' initial nervous anticipation to rapt attention as Mr. Rath recounts his youthful mishap is skillfully handled. The use of theatrical language and the dramatic pauses mirror the way Mr. Rath likely delivered this story in class, pulling the reader into the scene as if they were one of his students.

The story also effectively captures the impact Mr. Rath had on his students. The final paragraphs reveal a deeper truth about his teaching style—his ability to use personal anecdotes, laced with drama and wit, to engage his students and leave a lasting impression. This reflection adds a layer of meaning to the piece, turning what could have been just a humorous memory into a testament to Mr. Rath's influence as a teacher.

There are only a few minor areas where the writing could be tightened. For example, the sentence "The girls were incredulous, and each boy that had his own car... let a sneer flicker across his lips" could be more concise to maintain the story's pace. Additionally, the phrase "at an opportune moment in their class" could be reworded for clarity.

Overall, this piece is a delightful and well-crafted tribute to a teacher who clearly left a lasting mark on his students. The writing effectively balances humor, nostalgia, and a deeper reflection on the power of storytelling in education.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
14
14
Review of Winsome Wants  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem is evocative and richly textured with imagery, which immediately draws the reader in. The alliteration, especially with the repeated "w" sounds, adds a rhythmic quality that complements the theme of wandering and introspection.

The contrast between the external environment ("willow wood," "winter white," "waxing moon") and the internal struggle ("watered thoughts," "wistful, wanting wishes") is well-crafted. This creates a tension that builds as the poem progresses. The imagery of "iron consequence" and "wolf wraiths" introduces a sense of danger or foreboding, which makes the speaker's contemplation even more intense.

The line "and I wonder if I would dare / wrench free / from the warm side / of the window" is particularly striking. It captures a moment of hesitation and vulnerability, highlighting the comfort of safety versus the unknown challenges outside. This internal conflict is relatable and gives the poem emotional depth.

Overall, the poem succeeds in creating a vivid, atmospheric scene while exploring themes of desire, fear, and the allure of the unknown. The language is poetic yet accessible, making it easy for readers to connect with the emotions being expressed. The only suggestion might be to consider the pacing of the poem, as the heavy use of alliteration could potentially overwhelm the reader if not balanced with more varied sounds or rhythms. However, this is a minor point in an otherwise beautifully crafted piece.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
15
15
Review of Misunderstanding  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This short story is both humorous and relatable, capturing a typical sibling spat with a twist by making the characters German shepherds. The dialogue is lively and keeps the story moving, giving each character a distinct personality. Rebecca's dramatic attachment to her Kesha T-shirt and Ashley's calm, sarcastic demeanor create a fun dynamic between the two sisters.

The story's humor lies in the over-the-top reactions, like Rebecca's intense love for Kesha and Ashley's disinterest in her sister's musical taste. The use of exaggerated expressions, such as "Rebecca gasped, placed her hand over her heart," adds to the lighthearted tone. The twist at the end, where their mother, Natasha, reveals that the shirt was simply put away, is a classic way to wrap up the conflict while also reinforcing the sibling rivalry.

One thing that could enhance the story is more description of the setting or the characters' actions to give a better sense of the environment. For example, mentioning how Rebecca storms off or how Ashley smirks could help readers visualize the scene more vividly. Additionally, a bit more focus on the fact that these are German shepherds could add a layer of humor, perhaps by subtly integrating dog-like behaviors or instincts into their human-like interactions.

Overall, the story is enjoyable and captures the essence of a sibling argument, complete with playful banter and a humorous resolution. The blend of everyday conflict with a touch of absurdity, like talking dogs, makes it engaging and fun to read.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
16
16
Review of Pele Dances  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem captures the powerful and mystical presence of Pele, the Hawaiian goddess of volcanoes, as she dances across Halema'uma'u, a volcanic crater on the Big Island. The imagery of "firedances" and "waves are tipped in fire" effectively conveys the intense, fiery nature of the volcanic landscape. By personifying the volcano as Pele, the poem gives a sense of respect and reverence towards the natural forces at play.

The repetition of "She" emphasizes Pele's dominance and uniqueness, making it clear that only she has the right to dance in this fiery environment. The shift in tone with "She, angry of late," introduces a sense of tension, as the volcano's rumblings are linked to Pele's mood. This anger is portrayed as a warning or expression of frustration towards those who fail to respect or understand the power of the natural world.

The poem is short but effective in conveying a deep respect for the power of nature, especially in the context of Hawaiian culture. It uses simple yet vivid language to create a strong visual and emotional impact. The themes of nature's power and the need for respect and understanding are clear, making this a compelling and thought-provoking piece.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
17
17
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your story does a great job of building tension and intrigue, especially with the unexpected twist of the cat transforming into a human. The pacing is smooth, with enough detail to paint a vivid picture without dragging. Here are some thoughts and suggestions for improvement:

Characterization of Ryuk: Ryuk is portrayed as a somewhat solitary and introspective character. The scene where he saves the biscuits from Jing adds a nice touch of backstory, hinting at his resourcefulness or frugality. However, more internal dialogue or subtle hints about his personality could deepen the reader's understanding of his character. Why does he smile at the cat? Does it remind him of something or someone? Little details like these can make him more relatable.

Suspense and Atmosphere: The story effectively creates suspense, particularly when Ryuk realizes the cat can talk and when Rin transforms. The shift in atmosphere when it starts raining and when lightning strikes at the end adds to the tension. You might consider amplifying these moments by describing Ryuk’s emotional reactions more vividly—his heart racing, the chill running down his spine, etc.

Dialogue and Interaction: The dialogue between Ryuk and Rin feels natural and helps in moving the plot forward. However, the transition from shock to casual conversation could be smoothed out. Ryuk’s quick acceptance of Rin’s transformation might benefit from a bit more hesitation or internal struggle, which would make his character more believable.

The Ending: The cliffhanger at the end is intriguing, leaving the reader wanting more. Who is the figure at the door? Is it connected to Rin, or is it something else entirely? It’s a strong way to end the chapter, but consider adding a bit more description to heighten the tension—perhaps a detail about the figure’s appearance or Ryuk’s immediate thoughts as he sees it.

Overall Tone: The tone of the story shifts from light-hearted to suspenseful effectively, but be mindful of maintaining consistency in Ryuk’s voice. At times, his thoughts ("Even a girl from another world has friend-zoned me.") lean toward humor, while other parts of the story are more serious. Balancing these tones will help keep the reader engaged.

Rin’s Introduction: Rin’s character is introduced with a mix of mystery and charm. Her transition from cat to human is well-executed, but it might be enhanced by a more detailed description of her transformation. How does Ryuk feel as he watches this? Is there a moment of disbelief or awe?

Overall, you’ve created an engaging and mysterious narrative that draws the reader in. With some refinement in character development and emotional depth, this story could be even more captivating. Great work!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
18
18
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem paints a vivid picture of a mercenary—a person who is both proud and ambitious, always ready to act in their self-interest. The language you use is powerful, with phrases like "unfaltering, ageless wit" and "precipitously on guard" that create a strong sense of alertness and determination. The mercenary is depicted as someone who values monetary and worldly gains above all else, making them almost a symbol of human nature's more selfish instincts.

The comparison between the mercenary and nature's "heartiest, most instinctive specimens" is intriguing. It suggests that the drive for comfort and gratification, even through questionable means, is a fundamental part of both human and animal behavior. This adds a layer of universality to the poem, implying that these traits are not just limited to mercenaries but are inherent in all living beings.

However, the poem also carries a tone of criticism. Words like "aggressively" and "impurely," combined with the mention of "shady and unethical means," highlight a moral ambiguity. It seems to challenge the reader to reflect on the cost of such ambitions and the ethical implications of pursuing one's desires at any cost.

Overall, the poem is thought-provoking and well-crafted, with a clear message about the darker aspects of human nature. The imagery and language effectively convey the themes of ambition, self-interest, and moral compromise, making it a compelling piece.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Love Angel  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem beautifully captures the emotions of love, fear, and commitment. The rhyme scheme is consistent and adds a nice rhythm to the piece, which helps convey the depth of the speaker's feelings. Here’s a breakdown of the elements that stand out:

Emotional Depth: The poem does a great job of portraying the vulnerability that comes with love. The speaker’s fear of rejection and the relief and joy when those fears are unfounded are relatable and moving.

Imagery: The imagery, especially in the line "My knees turned to rubber, as my heart you stole," effectively communicates the physical reaction to intense emotions. It’s a vivid way to show the impact that the other person has on the speaker.

Consistency: The structure and rhyme scheme (ABAB) are consistent throughout, which gives the poem a steady flow. This consistency helps the reader focus on the emotions and story being told without getting distracted by uneven rhythm or rhyme.

Narrative Arc: The poem tells a clear story, moving from the initial moment of falling in love, through the fear of rejection, to a lifelong commitment. This progression is well-crafted and makes the poem feel complete.

Tone and Language: The tone is sincere and heartfelt, and the language is straightforward yet poetic. This simplicity allows the emotions to shine through without being overshadowed by overly complex vocabulary or metaphors.

Suggestions for Improvement:

Imagery Variation: While the imagery is strong, it could be enhanced with a few more varied descriptions to avoid repetition. For example, instead of "My knees turned to rubber," you might explore another way to describe that physical reaction to keep the imagery fresh.

Exploration of Fear: The fear of rejection is mentioned, but it could be expanded upon a bit more to add even more emotional tension. Perhaps a few more lines about the internal struggle before professing love would heighten the reader's anticipation.

Pacing: The poem flows nicely, but the third stanza feels a bit abrupt with the transition from crying to reassurance. A little more detail or a transitional phrase could smooth out this shift.

Overall, this is a touching and well-crafted poem that effectively conveys the profound emotions of love and commitment. With a few tweaks, it could become even more powerful.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Char  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your story has a powerful emotional depth, capturing the complicated relationships within a family, especially between a parent and child. The rawness of the emotions is palpable, and the way you’ve intertwined those feelings with the imagery of flight adds a beautiful, symbolic layer to the narrative.

One of the strengths of your writing is how you handle the dialogue. The conversations between the characters feel authentic, and they reveal a lot about their history without needing to dive into explicit exposition. The tension between the narrator and their father, the lingering pain from the past, and the complicated memories of the mother are all conveyed subtly through their interactions.

The use of animalistic traits, like the tail and ears, adds an interesting twist to the characters, making them more unique and giving the story a bit of a fantasy element. This approach works well, though it might benefit from a bit more consistency or explanation earlier on to set the scene for the reader.

A few areas for improvement:

Pacing: The story is rich in detail, but sometimes it feels a bit too dense. You might consider breaking up some of the longer paragraphs or streamlining certain sections to keep the reader engaged. The emotional impact will still be strong, but it will also be easier to follow.

Clarity: There are moments where the narrative becomes a bit hard to follow, particularly when shifting between the past and present or when the internal thoughts of the narrator blend with the dialogue. A bit more distinction between these elements could help clarify the timeline and the flow of the story.

Character Development: While the father and the narrator are well fleshed out, the mother’s character feels a bit distant, which might be intentional. However, if she’s meant to have a significant impact on the story's conclusion, consider giving her a bit more presence in the earlier parts of the narrative, even if it's just through the memories and reflections of the other characters.

Symbolism: The idea of flight as a metaphor for freedom and the mother’s true self is beautiful. However, this theme could be woven into the story more consistently. Perhaps reflecting on this symbolism more throughout the narrative could tie the beginning and end together more seamlessly.

Overall, this piece is emotionally resonant and engaging, with a strong sense of character and setting. With some refinement in pacing and clarity, it could be even more impactful.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Winter Homecoming  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your poem beautifully captures the essence of a weary traveler returning home, with a strong sense of warmth and anticipation woven throughout the lines. Here's a review:

Strengths:
Imagery: The imagery is vivid and evocative. The "white house standing tall on the snowy hillside" and "lit windows glowing warm at eventide" create a clear, comforting picture in the reader's mind.

Emotion: There's a deep emotional undertone, particularly in how you contrast the weariness of the traveler with the joy and relief he feels knowing he's close to home. This duality adds depth to the poem.

Flow and Rhythm: The poem has a natural rhythm, with a consistent rhyme scheme that gives it a musical quality. The rhyme pairs like "go" and "so," "been" and "in," as well as "cost" and "lost," help maintain this flow.

Theme: The theme of homecoming is universal and relatable, especially the idea of the sacrifices made for work and the yearning to be with loved ones. This makes the poem resonate with a wide audience.

Suggestions:
Pacing: The pacing could be enhanced by varying the line lengths a bit more, which might add to the emotional impact of certain lines. For example, shorter lines could emphasize the traveler's weariness or his urgency to get home.

Word Choice: While your word choice is generally strong, you might consider using more descriptive or varied language in places to further elevate the imagery. For example, instead of repeating "white" for the house and hillside, perhaps use a synonym or a metaphor to keep the imagery fresh.

Ending: The final lines do a good job of bringing the poem full circle, but consider ending on an even stronger note. Perhaps a more poignant or surprising final image could leave a lasting impression on the reader.

Overall, you've crafted a heartfelt and engaging poem that effectively conveys the warmth of home and the journey to return there. With a few tweaks, it could be even more powerful. Keep up the good work!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This piece beautifully captures the transition from past struggles to a hopeful future. The imagery of the bridge and rushing water creates a strong metaphor for the journey of moving on from pain and embracing what's ahead.

The first part, where you describe standing on the bridge and looking into the rushing water, effectively conveys a sense of being caught between two worlds. The water represents the past, full of pain and agony, but also the cleansing and purging that comes with letting go. The repetition of "rushing" and "oblivion" emphasizes the relentless and uncontrollable nature of the past.

In the second part, the act of letting go is powerfully illustrated through the mingling of tears with the water. This symbolizes release and healing. The transition from looking back to facing the future is smooth and hopeful. The darkness of the future is acknowledged, but there is also a strong belief that light will find a way through.

The closing lines are particularly uplifting. The acknowledgment of the past's lessons and the open-hearted embrace of the future reflect a positive and resilient mindset. The imagery of light lifting you up to abundance and fulfillment is inspiring and leaves the reader with a sense of optimism and determination.

Overall, the piece is well-structured and emotionally engaging. The use of metaphors and vivid imagery enhances the emotional impact, making it a compelling read. The flow from past to future is natural and the hopeful tone at the end provides a satisfying conclusion. Great job!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem, "Pastel framed poses with perfumes and whisky," captures the glamorous and surreal world of high fashion and entertainment. The repeated line "There’s a few artists that deserve a prenup without strings" hints at the notion that some artists are so exceptional that they merit unconditional admiration and respect. Here are a few thoughts on it:

Strengths:
Imagery: The poem is rich in vivid imagery. Lines like "Dazzling white dresses with stilettos of gold" and "Cell phones flash, capturing moments in time" paint clear pictures of the scenes being described. This helps the reader visualize the setting and feel the atmosphere.
Rhythm and Flow: The poem has a smooth rhythm, making it enjoyable to read. The consistent structure and rhyme scheme contribute to a lyrical quality that suits the subject matter of performance and spectacle.
Repetition: The refrain "There’s a few artists that deserve a prenup without strings" is effectively used to underscore the central theme. It ties the stanzas together and reinforces the idea of unconditional appreciation for exceptional artists.
Suggestions:
Clarify the Central Message: While the imagery is strong, the overall message can feel a bit unclear at times. The phrase "prenup without strings" is intriguing but also somewhat ambiguous. Expanding on what this phrase means in the context of the poem could enhance the reader's understanding.
Develop the Artists' Characters: Adding more specific details about the artists themselves could make the poem even more engaging. What makes these artists so deserving? Are there particular qualities or achievements that set them apart? Providing more context could deepen the emotional impact.
Balance of Elements: The poem successfully balances descriptions of the glamorous setting with the emotional responses of the audience. However, exploring the contrast between the public personas of the artists and their private selves could add an interesting layer to the poem.
Overall, this poem is a captivating glimpse into the world of high fashion and entertainment, with strong imagery and a rhythmic flow. With a bit more clarity and character development, it could be even more powerful. Keep writing and refining your work!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Antheraea  
Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This haiku captures the eerie and sudden nature of a late-night encounter with a Polyphemus moth. The concise structure and vivid imagery are effective in conveying the emotions and scene.

Imagery and Emotion: The phrase "midnight wind rises" sets a mysterious tone, immediately placing the reader in a quiet, dark setting disrupted by an unexpected gust. "Heart pounding visitation" effectively conveys the fear and surprise of encountering the moth, making it a very relatable human reaction. The final line, "trapped behind the screen," adds a visual element, illustrating the moth’s physical situation and emphasizing the barrier between the observer and the insect.

Structure: The haiku follows the traditional 5-7-5 syllable structure, which helps to maintain a rhythm and flow. This brevity is a strength, as it forces each word to carry significant weight, enhancing the overall impact of the poem.

Suggestions for Improvement:

Detail Enhancement: Consider adding a slight detail or adjective to further enrich the imagery. For example, "midnight wind rises" could become "chill midnight wind rises" to add an extra layer of sensation.
Emotional Depth: You might also explore the emotions or thoughts that follow the initial shock. A small change like "heart pounding visitation" could become "heart pounding silent visitation" to emphasize the eerie silence that often accompanies such moments.
Overall, your haiku is a strong and evocative piece that effectively uses the haiku form to capture a fleeting moment and the emotions tied to it. Great job!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
25
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Review by WriterRick
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)

This review gives a detailed account of several key passages from the Book of Revelation in the Bible, focusing on John's vision of the redeemed, the creation of a new heaven and new earth, and the description of the new Jerusalem. Here’s a brief overview of each part:

The Redeemed Before God's Throne: Revelation 7:9-10 portrays a massive, uncountable crowd from every nation, clothed in white and holding palm branches, praising God and the Lamb for their salvation. This scene emphasizes the inclusivity and diversity of God's kingdom.

A New Heaven and New Earth: Revelation 21:1-3 describes a new creation where the old heaven and earth have passed away, and the sea is no more. The new Jerusalem, like a bride adorned for her husband, descends from heaven, symbolizing the intimate relationship between God and His people.

End of Suffering and Death: In Revelation 21:4-7, John hears God declaring the end of all suffering, death, and pain. God promises to make everything new and to freely give the water of life to those who thirst, symbolizing eternal life and satisfaction.

The Holy City of Jerusalem: Revelation 21:9-13 describes the new Jerusalem as a radiant city, likened to a precious stone. It has high walls with twelve gates, each guarded by an angel and named after the twelve tribes of Israel. This signifies the city’s divine protection and the fulfillment of God's promises to His people.

Dimensions and Structure of the City: In Revelation 21:14-17, the city’s dimensions are given as a perfect cube, 12,000 furlongs (about 1,500 miles) on each side. The walls are 144 cubits (about 216 feet) thick. The city's vast size and symmetry reflect its perfection and grandeur.

Construction Materials: Revelation 21:18-20 details the city’s construction using precious stones and gold. The walls are made of jasper, and the city itself is pure gold, as clear as glass. The foundations are adorned with various precious stones, symbolizing beauty and eternal value.

Gates and Streets: Finally, Revelation 21:21-27 describes the twelve gates, each made of a single pearl, and the streets of pure, transparent gold. There is no temple because God and the Lamb are its temple. The city is illuminated by God's glory, and only the righteous, whose names are written in the Lamb’s book of life, can enter.

These passages collectively provide a vivid and hopeful vision of the future for believers, emphasizing God's eternal presence, the end of suffering, and the beauty and splendor of the new Jerusalem. They highlight themes of redemption, divine glory, and the fulfillment of God's promises, offering a powerful message of hope and reassurance.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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