I like the concept of the poem, but I couldn't get the words to flow, so I read it out loud, maybe it needs music, some kind of rythym. Oh well just a thought. Very interesting Ive noticed that you seem to like history, personal as well a cultural. Keep on writing, and I shall drop by again.Sasktoonie
You carry a nice even flow, good use of rhyme, not forced. Not too wordy either.I cant really find any fault nor do I really have any suggestions. I like it just as is.I hope you will do more writing along this line! thank you sasktoonie
I too was victomized in my youth, it held me back for many years,it seemed I had victom written all over me. Yes I then became a survivor and that took up most of the rest of my life. I realized I dont want to be a surviver I want to live life, not survive it. Leave the past behind and enjoy the future to its fullest. My life is now filled with anticipation, not hauntings from the past. I hope you too will be a liver of life.
I hope you will inspirer others to go beyond survival.
Best Wishes Sasktoonie
Wisdom and generousity, very cute way of gifting. Love
brings blessings which produces many more gifts,very contageous effects. Too many gifts pass them on, the blessings then abound. Here's to extravagant sharing, may they return ten fold. sasktoonie
I find this interesting, how ever I take a different view. Man needs to do nothing, The child does nothing to contribute to his own birth. His impressions come weather he ponders or not. Reality is, weather he sees it or not. Imagingings do not have to be envoked.We choose to participate or not, to create or not to create. sasktoonie
Not only is this a great piece, but it is trully inspirational. I too have had hereos in my life. Ive had many losses too. But somehow theres that one person(s)that gives you strength to go on. Those that can usually draw strength from those around them. You should publish this piece in a magazine. You have inspired me too opening acknowledge those who have given me strendth in my darest hours. Thank you Sasktoonie
Is there sientific proof there is not a God? One would have to enter the supernatural to do such a study, and how would one do such a study? There's no solid forms in a spiritual realm, you well trully never know as an unbeliever tell you die. Then it's too late. I guess you would have to believe that countless numbers of peoples past and present all suffer from mass hysteria.very interesting.sasktoonie
Very bold, very strong, and very brave. Not every one will see, as you see, however that said. Very well written, you portrayed your thoughts well, and manage to keep momentum and flow.You have forced one to concider a closer look.Well done sasktoonie
Wow, such passion and caring not only in actions but also in words. So many are unaware of the pain and loss
that lingers in the world. I'm glad you wont forget.We need more people like you to remind us lest we forget.Keep speaking out, God Bless, Sasktoonie
I think you said it all, It's bad enough to battle personal wars, sickness, losses. These we do not choose
But your right about warring mankinds and his nature.
I think you nailed it nicly in this piece. thank you.
I shall drop in to browse again.sasktoonie
This is a nice piece, I'm trying to write a short story
myself so, I'm checking out samples here and there looking for tips. I enjoyed your story very much and I shall be back to visit again. Hope you'll pop in at my site, leave a review or two.Thank you sasktoonie
Very nice, I like your discription, I love to read and write poetry, I loved reading this. Excellent for first
attempt. I have just started my first attempt at a short story, not done yet. I hope you well (attempt) more poetry. Beautiful well done. sasktoonie
I found this piece light and fun, I really enjoyed it.
I admire people who can write short stories. I write them too, never put them on line though. I guess I'm a chicken. I hope that one day I shall be able to write like that. For now I do poetry , let my heart do all the talking. I enjoyed my visit here, I shall be back.
(got to get me a piece of pie). lol sasktoonie
Hi! Mya,
I really think that this is my favorite poem of yours so far. I think many people, not just myself
can relate to the dragon. Unfortunately some of us have
married him; still carrying the battle scares of our escape. Good going, I really like your work.
Love your work
sasktoonie
Hello, I enjoyed your short story. Being a woman, it was nice to peer into the mind of a man, and find he has insecurities too. I enjoyed it so much , I show it to my husband. He is not a writer, but he assured me most men can relate to your story. By the way he also like it. Thank you for sharing.
Sasktoonie
I especially enjoyed " Reprise " , my mind drifted,
with the plesant flow of your words, to becoming,
startled, at the conclusion. I don't feel qualified
to rate your work. But I do know what I personally like
so I give my highest rating. Thankyou .
Sasktoonie
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/sasktoonie
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.08 seconds at 3:52pm on Nov 21, 2024 via server WEBX1.