Wow. I really liked the feelings described here. The feeling helpless and with no control. The feeling of being young where you don't really understand but you understand more than any one knows.
The flow was nice. Very well written. Leaves me wanting to read more to really understand this character. Well done. Keep up the good work. And thank you for sharing.
Nice rant. You did in fact make your point clear. I enjoyed the way you described it. Couldn't make it much clearer than you did. But in a good way. The best way actually.
It was very neatly wrote. The tone was even throughout the entire piece. Well done well done. Keep up the amazing work.
Such an enjoyable read. Such imagery used. I am can relate a lot to this part:
We just watch the spins,
making the best
of the worst
of our best
at our worst.
I fear I am not grasping the over all picture here. Who exactly is this Boogie man you named?
Well done keep up the good work.
I enjoyed the poem. A little hard to follow though by the way you broke up sentences to keep the rhyme. Other than that it was an very enjoyable read. You did a very nice job choosing the words to paint the picture. Keep up the great work. You have a real talent. Thanks for sharing
I enjoyed the conversation you had with the dewdrops. You really made them take on a life.
The flow was good.
The imagery was amazing.
In my minds eye I could see it all unfold as I read it.
You captured my attention in such a gentle way.
It was an easy and very enjoyable read thank you for sharing. Keep up the great work.
Magnificent. Utterly and truly magnificent.
The flow was great. I admired the short lines. A real attention grabber.
The word play was brilliant. Imagery was elegant and tantalizing of all the scenes from.the visual to the audible. I could feel it. My favorite part in this piece was: I smile, grateful.
"I smile, grateful.
He smiles back,
grateful also."
It broke the mood of this price. So careful almost forgetting what was at least
Flow: Well wrote
Imagery so elegant the way you blend and combine things that I would not ordinarily blend. But I see the relevance in all.
Truly it is a duet if hearts minds and souls.
The way you separate the music from from the lyrics
My poetry you tune wow that is beautiful. Well done thanks for sharing.
Very nicely done.
The meters are very well thought out.
The way it flows in one thought is good. I love the way you encompass the message. About how vain and jealous we are to hold beauty in our hands though we as humans remove it from it's current state.
Well done keep up the great work. You make writing a rondel look so easy.
Awww. That is beautiful.
The way you view her. How delicately you describe her.
The flow is nice.
Imagery is very well crafted.
Grammar is good.
The passion is just clear. The eyes you see her with. The way you define beautiful here is just elegant gentle soft and true. Well done keep up the amazing work you do.
Love the karma here. He thought he was so clever. I got a good laugh.
The flow was great.
The lines kept me wanting more.
No grammar problems I could see.
You did really well to tell the story not to many words but just enough. Keep up the great work you do. Can't wait to read more.
Wow! That is so real. Honest and firm the way you write it. The words you use. There is nothing else it could mean. I enjoyed it though I didn't at the same time. Allow me to explain the truth you speak I dare not believe it is truth though in my heart I know. Well done. Well done
Interesting that you claim it is self loathing when it is so beautifully written. Your words the flow. The imagery. The sad remembrance in the end. Or it could be seen as a longing to return. That is the joy of writing though so many interruptions. Oh I see it now it is a reflection not a relationship duh lol. But you did amazing with it. None the less.
Structure: Very nicely written.
Flow: It was very gentle it really pulled many emotions from me.
Imagery: The way you brought things o life was magic. Simply magic.
I didn't find any spelling problems. Nicely written. Thank you for sharing keep up the good work. It really shows.
First off let me say it was very captivating lots of action. I just got held up on a few spots. Due to typos. I will share.
-The women who had fired the shot... Did you mean to write woman? I got a little confused.
-No way were leaving you" Cam shouted, did you mean we're not leaving?
-"they burst through the sealing flying into..." Through the ceiling?
Just thought I would help you. Thank you for sharing. You really have a great imagination. Look forward to reading more.
Great imagery. I love how you bring to life the the boulder, the anchor, and the chain. There is great strength and faith in your words. Very nicely written. Keep up the good work.
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