\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/serena_lake
Review Requests: OFF
7 Public Reviews Given
16 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of I Am Sorry Mom  Open in new Window.
Review by Serena Lake Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Serena is speechless*

This must be one of the most emotionally-driven poems I have ever read and one of the most beautiful too. You tell a story with so much pain and suffering in such an incredible way, and as poetry, at that. This made me shiver, it made me softly cry, and it made me very much sad. I am very much sorry for your friend, despite the fact that words, sometimes, are pretty meaningless.

I loved how this poem flowed, how you managed to portray these incredibly painful memories and emotions in these lines. It is a very beautiful poem, even more so because of its reality and the feeling behind it. It is, indeed, an experience most people think would never happen to them, but it is very likely that it might, one day, when we least expect it. We live in a dangerous world, where trust is sometimes overrated. Unfortunately, I say. We should be able to trust our friends, but they can still hurt us. Your friend suffered a betrayal of trust and it resulted in this horrid experience. Writing about it must be painful, but I thank you for sharing this poem with all of us.

I have only two suggestions to offer you, to make this poem even better, though it's wonderful exactly as it is, anyway.

"I barely can see a thing" [perhaps you could put the can before the barely?]

"He's doesn't care the least bit" [should be He doesn't care...]

Again, this is a beautiful piece, and so very poignant. Congratulations, from the bottom of my heart.

Regards,

Serena
1 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/serena_lake