I love the rhyming in this poem. Combined with the light, almost humorous tone, creates an almost Dr. Seuss vibe. I'm fascinated by the blunt language, particularly in stanza two. It creates a tension and discomfort that drives the poem forward. while sometimes repetitive, I feel that the consistent honesty is important to the message, and to the character and voice of our speaking narrator.
Thank you so much for sharing your art with us! This is a raw and bold poem, and it was an honor to read it.
Love this! It has a thoughtful tone, and elicits a sense of wonder and comfort. I feel the last line is a little straight forward/literal, especially after a line like "new beginnings awaken". It would be interesting to see that image built off of to complete the poem. Overall a really lovely haiku!
Happy Writing
-- S.E. Martin
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