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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/sillybearcbb
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4 Public Reviews Given
13 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of My Confession  Open in new Window.
Review by Sillybearcbb Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I really like this and can feel the emotions this guy puts out for this girl. The only thing I can see wrong or don't understand is the line:
"You are confused with the changes taking place,
And have no idea, or have them bit less."

The part with have them bit less....maybe repharse or change a word, to me to doesn't sound right with the poem.
BUT i'm not very good at writing myself so....
I thought it was a wonderful poem and keep up the good work.
Silly
2
2
Review by Sillybearcbb Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
In this line that you wrote
"Is a beautiful image of you in my head"
I think you should use the word "mind" instead of head.
wouldnt should be wouldn't.
two should be too.
i should be I, Ive should be I've, im should be I'm, and ill should be I'll.

Other than those little mistakes I think you have a very good poem and I really enjoyed reading it.
Job well done,
Silly
3
3
Review of haunted  Open in new Window.
Review by Sillybearcbb Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Very Good, I liked this very much.
4
4
Review of Insomnia  Open in new Window.
Review by Sillybearcbb Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
At the top I think you meant to spell head instead of had. At the bottom I think some of those lines need to be broke up and made shorter and your missing a coma or two.
Good Job,
Silly
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