Good rhyme. Good rhythm. Maybe I would change a few words, if I may, "If I ran free under the sky," to If I ran free beneath the sky, "no deadline I must meet." to no deadline must I meet. and "while she wanders the land." to while she wanders about the land, or around the land. Just suggestions. It's a very good poem that tells a great story. I really enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing it with us. Keep up the good work.
MrSteve
Your fact tell the story. Every day I wake up expecting that tell-tale cough to start up. I've worried and cried almost every day since my exposure. In the early 1980's I was exposed to an extreme amount of asbestos dust. I had it checked and the Dr. told me not to worry because there wasn't anything I could do about it. Your article reopened my eyes. Thank you. Maybe your article will bring the right people together and we can get a stronger lobby force in Washington.
MrSteve
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