You have a very interesting premise here; I really like the plot. The punctuation needs a lot of work and it's mildly distracting, but that's something that just comes with learning and practice. It seems almost unfinished, in a way. Who was watching them? Why didn't her father say anything in the morning? Was Jenna just dreaming the whole thing? It feels like there's a lot that could be expanded on. But like I said, I enjoyed the plot. It could even be an entire book! (I bet it would sell really well.) I would love to see a final draft. Good work.
Aside from a few minor punctuation errors, I enjoyed it a lot. I was able to picture everything clearly, something that can be difficult for a writer to accomplish in so few words. It felt a little choppy in places, but that's understandable for challenges where you have to stay at a certain word count. I think this could turn out to be quite the excellent piece if it were expanded on.
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