I liked it very much. Indeed I have often thought of our colonies on Mars becoming a seperate nation. Actually, the our future descendants born on Mars may not be able to come here due to the vast increasee in gravity.
Sadly some of your other predictions may come to pass. But if we keep writing about them, we may change this future.
Thanks for this piece exploring the human reaction to the puzzle of time.
I am not sure about the abbreviated words; possibly you were conveying the view of someone speaking in the venacular. The poem also has the a rythm like a rap and that might be your reason.
However, for me at least, the first lines are the most powerful and very memorable.
Thanks for this very interesting poem that presents us with enigmas about its subject.
Simple but it says so much and asks even more.
By the way, there was an interview on the radio this morning with a celebrated Irish author whose latest novel is one continuous sentence and its spans just one hour.
Sparse writing then can convey meaning may better an excess.
As a vet, I thank you for thinking of service personnel serving their country.
A letter from home means so much; I hope this finds its way to a recipient keen to hear your news of peace and home.
I love your discription of the farm animals and would be keen to meet Bosco. You communicate what your soldier might be fighting for very well.
It's full of contrasts which fascinate. The rich scenary against Delia's poverty.
There us the twist in the tail - is she really in some form of Holy Orders or merely an allusion?
You Certainly have a good descriptive 'eye' for your scene and that smell of coffee haunts.
Finally, you bring the story to a neat close albeit with the hook I have already mentioned.
Many thanks for this. I once heard a wonderful story of the wedding couple in old age drinking the last of the wine Christ created. I like they idea of being a 'roving reporter' and it is a new way to look at a familiar narrative.
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/stradella
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.07 seconds at 1:15pm on Dec 26, 2024 via server WEBX1.
| (4.0)
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
