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Review of Stand Still  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello, Richard, this story popped up on Read and Review. The title, Stand Still, made me stop and read and I’m pleased I did.
One wonders why this trauma you were made to endure was never spoken of again. Even to this day. Yet it still troubles you. It’s good you are able to write it on the page, even if you’re unable to say the words.
The reaction you showed at being abandoned in such a hostile environment reminded me of when my son fell into the swimming pool at aged two. His sister, four years older had seen him and called out. He just stood, like you, on the bottom of the pool. Not panicking, not breathing and yet he made no sound for the rest of the day. He was in shock and so were you. It was a cruel thing to do intentionally and I’m sad for that four year old.

I think the sentence: In his jokingly way by his actions told my Mother he wanted her but he didn’t want me. could be made clearer.
Perhaps drop the jokingly way and say:His actions were to let my mother know although he wanted her he didn’t want me.

Thank you for sharing.
Sue.


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Review of Destroyed  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hello, I’m reviewing this story for I Write in 25. I’m unsure of my reactions to the story. I understand the trauma people go through after a tragedy as they look for someone to blame or turn the blame onto themselves. When it’s a child that’s been lost, whether by illness or accident, it makes it so much harder. Grief often comes between couples as each grieves in their own way.

I try to put myself in the place of a loved one when justice seems not to be served. It’s understandable they would seek vengeance.

In this case, your story, both parties turn to religion to assist in healing. But what happens if religion isn’t a part of their lives? How would the story resolve? I’d be interested in an alternative ending. I know for myself I wouldn’t find peace or forgiveness in religion.

Your story is well written, these dreadful traumas happen on a day to day basis and I’m sure all don’t have a happy ending. However I’m pleased your characters all found their solutions to be able to continue to live in peace.

Thank you for sharing this story.
Sue.


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Review of The Big Break  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, this story came up as a suggestion in Read and Review. As usual, Jacky you nailed it. The flash fiction genre is certainly something you excel at.
This story is no exception. I could almost feel Jean’s eagerness to be allowed to show what she was made of. She was determined to be better than the actress she had been understudy for. But it wasn’t as I imagined a Shakespearean piece of theatre. I laughed at the image at the end. Thank you for sharing.
Sue.


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Review of Angel Feathers  Open in new Window.
for entry "A Prayer" Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I’m reviewing this poem for I Write in 25.

What a loving and thoughtful thing to do for your friend. A free verse poem written with love for a successful and healthy pregnancy. I do know from experience things don’t always go to plan. All we can do is put our faith in the medical profession and with the Lord.

I especially liked that you prayed your friend would find the fortitude needed to be a good mother. Fortitude is something all parents need a large supply of at times.

The line I loved most was a wish for the child to have a happy childhood. I think that’s what all parents hope they can give. Happiness is found in knowing unconditional love, not in having material wealth. Security is knowing that whatever happens they’ll always have a home.

Thank you for sharing.
Sue.


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hello Ethan, before I give you my thoughts on the story, let me be one of the first to welcome you to WdC. I saw you hadn’t yet filled out your bio which disappointed me. I always like to know a little about the author of the story before I read and review.
The title of your story was what first made me want to read it. I really liked it.
It’s very well written and kept me on the edge of my seat the whole time wondering what was happening and how it would end.
It’s getting late in the evening here and I’m sitting alone with just a single reading lamp. There was a noise outside and I suddenly felt uneasy, I blame your story for that!😂😳

It did leave me with more questions than answers, such as why the staff wore masks and sunglasses. As you mentioned them several times I thought the reader might get to discover why at the end.

Anyway I’ll have to come to my own conclusions about that won’t I?
Thanks for sharing and I’ll certainly be visiting your portfolio again. Well done.
Sue.


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Review of The Right to Vote  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thank you for expressing your opinion in this piece regarding the voting system in your country and the failure of some citizens to vote.

In Australia where I live now voting is compulsory. Some are of the opinion that they shouldn’t be forced to attend a voting place and express their opinion as to whom will be running the country for the next four years. Are they apathetic? Don’t they realise the right to vote has been hard fought for?
I have visited many Asian countries at voting times and to see the extremely long queues of people standing out in the heat to place their vote is humbling.
I think of Mrs Pankhurst in the UK and her fight for the Woman’s Vote. History demands those who can vote must vote or never raise their voice in protest or make a complaint about the ones who are in power.

I noticed your article was written five years ago and so much has happened in the USA since 2020. The world is in such turmoil now, I hope and pray for cool heads to prevail. I’m very disappointed with the calibre of our world leaders who are playing with the lives of thousands of people. I think it’s time to pass the batons to women leaders, they would not tolerate the deaths of so many children, either by bullet or starvation, which is happening in so many countries.
Thank you for sharing.
Sue


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Review of Mentor  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, Jace, your acrostic poem cropped up in Read and Review. I see this was written a very long time ago but time has no effect on good poetry or prose does it?
Acrostics set challenges which other forms of poetry don’t have to conform to, and so I think you did a good job with the prompt, MENTOR.

A competent mentor does all the things you suggest and more, unfortunately not all of us were fortunate to have such a person in their lives.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hello, I’m reviewing this for I Write in 25.
I read the story and my first thoughts were, I wondered how many times this scene was happening in homes across the world.

In this case it was the mother who found it hard to adjust to her daughter being old enough to make her own decisions and mistakes, but it’s often the father. Fathers usually find it difficult to see their daughters as anything but their little girl.
The dialogue flowed naturally and the scene believable.

I realised I had already read it. Was it written for the Parenting Contest?
Good luck in the contest if it was.
Thank you for sharing.
Sue


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Review of A Lesson to Learn  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hi, I’m reviewing this short story as next in line at I Write in 25.
The story shows a mother teaching her daughter to make a bed. It made me think about myself as a child and as a mother. I’m pretty sure I was never taught this task when I was young, nor, I’m ashamed to add did I ever actually deliberately teach my children. Needless to say they all managed to make many beds during their lives.

The first line could be made a little clearer. Instead of You will be doing it Anne girl," which made it sound as if the mother was angry, despite the dialogue tag saying it was said sweetly, You could begin by saying something like: “It’s time to make your bed, Anne and I’ll show you how to do it yourself.” I would also have liked a hint as to Anne’s age. She sounded quite young as she called her Mom, Mommy.

It’s quite an art isn’t it when you read all the different stages? I smiled at Anne putting the fitted sheet on the wrong way, I do that all the time. It’s so frustrating. If I was rich I’d have fresh sheets every day and someone to make the beds too.


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Review of The Blues  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hello again, I stumbled over this witty story on Read and Review. Dialogue only is one of my favourite items to read and attempt to write. It’s not easy to ensure the reader knows how the characters are feeling without dialogue tags.
Not only was I never in doubt as to who was speaking, It was as if I was witness to the interaction, as one insisted she could differentiate between all the shades of blue on offer and the other was the same where pizza was concerned. Very cleverly done.
Thanks for sharing.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, I came across this poem of yours on Read and Review. I wonder do you remember writing it six years ago?
There are some wise words embedded in those 17 lines. I learned long ago people can’t be fixed. They might shift their shape a little to please you but they’re not fixed.
I liked the last bit of advice to look in the mirror. None of us are perfect, although we often kid ourselves we’re not far off.
I don’t know if you’ve ever heard this song: but it’s very apt. https://youtu.be/qdZ5wY9XxdA?si=x7qKFI3K3p7b5-O6


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Review of The final hour  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello, let me one of the first to welcome you to WdC. I read your introduction and it is obvious you’re no stranger to writing. I notice you haven’t yet written your personal biography. I always like to know more about the person whose story I’m reviewing.
I’ve read both of your stories in your portfolio and found them touching and honest.
Sometimes writing to a deadline can be difficult and scary, but it can force one to write which can be a good thing. Writing about the death of a beloved parent isn’t easy but I’m sure you did your father proud. Maybe you could share it on WdC sometime.
Don’t forget to fill in your bio, I’d love to know where you’re from and a little more about you.
Thanks for sharing your stories.
Sue.


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello, let me welcome you to WdC. I hope you find everything you need and want here.
The Bus that Never Came is a wonderful title which caught my eye. I’m so pleased it did because I loved it.
I’m not a poet and so not really qualified to speak about its poetical attributes but as they say ‘I know what I like.’ And like I did. It touched me, made me feel reflective. I can’t know who the narrator was or anything about her life, but the yearning in the words was powerful. It speaks to all of us, for who amongst us has achieved everything their heart’s desires?
The first stanza set up the story. I loved the last two lines. They showed how she thought she’d always have, or at least be able to provide, everything everyone needs. That’s a huge expectation of oneself.
Even when we get whatever it was we always desired, it usually comes with strings attached.
Did she dream of the unattainable? Was she herself not enough? Has she really missed the bus? I’ve found if one waits long enough there’s always another one.
The poem leaves me with many questions, but I loved it. Thank you for sharing and stirring my emotions.
Sue


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Review of Retreat Re-Treat  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I’m reviewing this great story as next in line at I Write in 25. Right from the first line I was hooked. The first line was dialogue which not everyone agrees is a good way to start a short story but I’ve always enjoyed it and often use it myself.

The characters were very believable but it crossed my mind that there’d be no way any of my teenage children could have been convinced to accompany their grandparents on a four night pensioner retreat. However I’m sure there are plenty of kids that are less selfish than mine were.

You kept the reader guessing throughout the story as to what Grandpa had in mind for his old friend. I was relieved Samuel Patrick hadn’t died and Grandpa recovered from his shock.

Great entry using the prompt which could have inspired so many genres. It’s nice to read something light and entertaining which has a happy ending.

Good luck in the Contest, it’s one that’s really worth entering with great prizes.
Sue.


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Review of Something, Still  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello, Fyn, I came across this poem you wrote twenty years ago! I found it in Read and Review. So much time has passed since you penned this but it’s still very relevant now.
If you live long enough you’ll be privy to see suburbs gradually change from salubrious to dirty, gritty and dangerous. I have also seen those working class, industrial areas gentrified and priced out of reach of the average man.
One wonders how it all changes. When does the rot begin to set in? Your elderly protagonist had seen it all change before her eyes and she remembered those better days. Yet through all the dirt, thugs and crime she could still take pleasure from the geranium determined to survive and bloom. Giving her hope.
Great observational poem. I enjoyed the read.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi, I’ve just finished your story and I enjoyed the read.
Right from the beginning the reader gets a sense of unease as Sheila notices things weren’t right; the door mat and music.
Moldoff was unsettling, at first I felt he was more of a poltergeist and wouldn’t harm Sheila. But as the story continued we saw he was truly dangerous and intended to cause harm.
The hint that Father Dana himself was corrupted was a bit of a twist.

After Sheila had been strangled what followed seemed rushed as if you were conscious of the word count which was a shame. I do know 2000 words is the limit for the Horror Writing Contest, and sometimes it’s not enough.

Great job using the prompt. Good luck in the contest.
Sue


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Review of Time in a bottle  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello again and welcome to WdC. You sent a review to me and I thought I’d return the favour. I do hope you enjoy your time here.
I smiled when I read your beautiful words. I can imagine your shelf full of bottles which are holding your lifetime of memories. They could sit alongside my pile of video tapes which are holding mine.
I really enjoyed reading your poem today as it’s been one of those days for me when I’m looking back to the past instead of forwards to the future. Each stanza holds its own truths but the first one grabbed my attention and the rest kept it there until the last.
Thank you for sharing.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Another gem on Read and Review. It’s a place where old stories and poems reside until on the off chance they are discovered by a reader looking for a pleasant read. I’m pleased this poem made its way up to the top of the pile after so many years of being unloved. Well I loved it.
I think my favourite stanza is the first one. The unimaginable is now common place We could be referring to technological advances or in my case getting old. It was unimaginable to me how being old actually is in reality. The third stanza could also be referring to someone getting old and past its use by date. The mechanics say that there is nothing they can do. They insist that it’s a write off
We come to the last sad stanza. The engine has given out
No more traveling for you
Stranded on the highway of existence
With no where to go
With no way of getting there even if you did
 Those words are so poignant. Sometimes that’s just how I feel.
Beautifully written, imaginative poem. It was a pleasure to read.
Sue


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Review of The Poet Tree  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello, I found this story in Read and Review. I enjoyed the read very much. It brought back memories of those I have lost during my life of course, as it probably did for everyone who read it.
Oh the joy Sarah must have experienced when seeing those simple but insightful messages written in her father’s handwriting. Then realising it was nature which had given him the words to his songs. His muse- Mother Nature - was all around him, just waiting for him to become aware of her bountiful gifts.
Inspiration is all around us if we just open all ourselves and senses to it.

Thank you for sharing this gentle and emotional story, it was a pleasure to read.
Sue


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Review of The Best Day Ever  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, I came across this little story in Read and Review. I noticed you wrote this back in 2020 but the subject matter of small boys and birthdays never dates or loses its magic.
The excitement of upcoming special days never fades either. Sometimes I’ve found, as Joey discovered, the reality of the day can often be disappointing if something doesn’t go to plan.
Joey’s plan for a day out with his dad seemed doomed before it had even started when his mum threw a spanner in the works and insisted on tagging along, even worse his baby sister was coming too. But as things are wont to happen, just when you think things are going to be bad they turn out just great.
Thank you for sharing, I enjoyed the read.
Sue


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Review of Stewardship  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Thank you for sharing your childhood memories. How beautiful it is to arrive at what seems to be an untouched and unspoiled piece of nature where one can set up camp and feel as if you’re the only ones who have ever been there.
But not all human beings appreciate the bounty that is there to enjoy, admire, and be grateful for.
It always upsets me to see litter left for someone else to clean up.
I live close by to a McDonalds and every day I pick up fast food containers that have been tossed aside without a care. More parents need to tell their children to pick up after themselves, but it seems it is a lesson many kids never receive.
Thank you for the reminder of the wonders of this earth we all share.
Sue.


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Review of Rain Clouds  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello and Happy Birthday. I do hope the British weather has turned on a Sunny, warm day for you. Although I live in Western Australia now my first 28 years were in the Midlands and have experienced the longing for the sun.
This lovely little poem makes me a little homesick for the soft rain, the sparrows, which we don’t get here, and my English dogs of my childhood.
Thank you for a taste of home. Have a wonderful day, thank you for sharing your poem.
Sue


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Review of Naked Ned  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi, I’ve just read this story as I was checking out the Horror Writing Contest entries. This was a great read, the sense of unease and tension I felt remained throughout the story. Your images of the river setting were well drawn and you included all the senses, especially the sense of smell as you described the unique swampy odour.
Catchy title and great use of the prompt.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, I saw this little story on Read and Review.
It was an enjoyable read and anyone who has kids will recognise the “joys” of a road trip with them.
The moral of this story is to listen to Mom, she always knows best.
Another thing which rang true was the fact that Dads are loathe to stop for rest breaks. They just want to get there in as short a timeframe as possible and forget to make the journey part of the experience.
You incorporated the prompt word “chocolate” seamlessly into the story.
Thank you for sharing, I enjoyed reading.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Carly, I found your entry to Writer’s cramp on Read and Review. This essay is a personal look into your psyche as you seek to understand how you see yourself and how you fit into the world.
You’ve tried to change, stick to promises you’ve made to yourself, but you knew as you made those promises, those resolutions to change, you wouldn’t succeed.
Perhaps you were just too hard on yourself, expecting that this time it would be different. You would stick to that diet, limit your alcohol consumption, and definitely stop swearing, and yet, there you go, failed again.
The solution is simple. Acceptance. Accept the true you and stop beating yourself up. After all would you recognise yourself if you were a clean living, health-obsessed, non drinking, non swearing and completely rational human being? Do you want to be someone else?
Forget about restrictions, just be you.

Thanks for sharing, it could be written about most of us as we beat ourselves up. I loved it!

now that about coves me for the day did you mean covers?
Sue.


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