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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/travelingmind
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3 Public Reviews Given
3 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Mask  Open in new Window.
Review by Amindthattravels Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hey there,

I loved reading your poem. I like the way it captivates you from the very first sentence. I think that what you are describing in your poem is also very relatable for many people. The way you have written your work makes it very easy to fill in your own experience which makes it very easy to picture.

Also I love the way your rhyme is subtle yet consistent and the way you start each stanza with a version of the same sentence . But what I love the most is the way you play with your rhyme scheme. Though some may find the inconsistency makes it hard to read or lose its rhythm, I believe it adds creativity and deeper meaning to your beautiful poem.

The only feedback I have is that in the last stanza you repeat yourself. To me every word in a poem is incredibly important because they were chosen this way and that gives them layers of meaning. Repeating yourself like the first sentences of the stanza add to these layers, but the repetition in your last stanza took some of the layer away. Of course this is just my interpretation.

Thank you for sharing. I know poems can be very personal, which sometimes makes them hard to share.

Write on!
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Review of Hollow  Open in new Window.
Review by Amindthattravels Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hey, I'm a newbie and this is my first review but I have to start somewhere right? Anyhow I really liked your poem. The feeling you describe is something I think everybody knows yet everybody knows differently. With your poem you express this feeling even if it is so unique and personal. I also really like how there is some kind of dichotomy in your poem. The, in your words, dreamlike state and the return to reality. It is very recognizable yet very philosophical.

Enjoy further writing!
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