Hey! Thanks for coming to my review forum! Here's my review of your story...
 Grammar: Okay, I think I'm going to paste this entire thing in here. I'll either bold something if I think it should be changed (or a misspelling) or crossed out.
The man fell outside the pub, his shirt was covered in pukeand looked as if he had fought a hobo over it. He straightened up, and began to walk cautiously down the side?walk.
His name was Henry, but most knew him as Twinks. The nickname wasn't anything special, just a childhood name that stuck. Now there wasn't anything childish about Twinks. His alcoholic driven mentality drove him from bar to bar, night to night. Looking. For what, no one ever knew. They did know one thing about Twinks though: he was trouble. Twinks had to almost always had to be thrown out of the bar he was in., and then. He would then continue his dark walk, just looking to be...accepted some thought, while others just assumed he was just driven to what ever would kill him the quickest.(that's an awkward sentence- might want to reword that)
Tonight was no different. A different bar, a different drug, but for all the same reason: Twinks had yet again found himself on the all accepting street. Twinks adjusted his eyesight to the dark alleyway behind Tank's Bubbly Wonders bar and began to trudge along.
"f***ings.....the bastards..think they...f***..." Twinks mumbled drunkenly into drunkenly into the alleyway. The forgiving darkness. The darkness never threw him out, but instead, brought him in. It covered him from his fears, from the rejection. His status on society was simple. Drunk. He was no more then that. A life passed by. And to look at Twinks, one could almost assume his life was meant to be like this. But in reality, Twinks had almost every possibility in the world. His parents were normal, a beating here, a discipline action there, but no abuse. Alcohol itself wasn't even present in his family. The only one who even drank, besides Twinks, was his uncle Richie, who actually owned a brewing company in New York.
Currently, Twinks had nothing but how the hell he was going to get home on his mind. He wiped out the wretched, crusted puke from his lips, and gave what he called, a "boozical burp". The stench reflected back into Twinks nostrils, and even though he was dead-drunk, spun-out, and rejected, Twinks even pulled back at the stench of his breath. Slowly, he made his way down the alleyway, feeling his way like a blind man.
"The END....the only friend...the end...mystical...jimbles***s.." Twinks sang out into the dark night.
"Can ya' picture....me and you...in need...of A STANGERS HAND..the desperate land, pornographic hand jobs, up and down your..ha ha ha ha..." Twinks laughed heartily to himself as he heard his drunken rambition of The End by The Doors sung back to him.
"f***ing....children insane..," Twinks finished. Twinks looked up and blinked. The bright moon light reflected onto his face, and the summer wind blew across his nose. Snorting, he turned left onto a main street, which he know noticed was no where he knew.
"Ride the high west....baby." A soft voice from behind him murmured.
"WHATf***THEHELL!" Twinks spun around so fast that bits of puke spun off his shirt and stuck to the wall beside him.
"The west is the best..."The calm dark voice replied.
" The blue busssss...is calling usssss.." The voice gew louder and began to ssth. (what was this supposed to be?)
" The killer awoke before dawn, and he took a face from an ancient GALLARY AND HE WALKED DOWN THE HALL!" The voice calm at first, grew louder and then erupted in a scream.
The drunk Twinks screamed and erupted in a drunken attempt to escape from the voice. Instead, Twinks succeeded in flailing over a tipped-over trash can. Landing on his face, Twinks let out a "Hmmph. The figure crept over to the bleeding Twinks.
"Father....." The figure murmured.
"...ehhh...ehh" was all Twinks could get out.
"I want to kill you." The figure replied, and then let out a loud brash cackling.
Inside, beyond Twinks drunkenness, he felt a curdeling. Something was wrong here. The figure, Oh dear God, The figure....
Slowly revealing himself in the moonlight, the figure appeared, and the clown suite appeared out of the light. His blood stained glove brought immediate panic to Twinks mind. Then the a large image reflected itself in the moonlight.
"The end....my only FRIEND!" the clown screamed out, and started the large object, which just happened to be a chainsaw. Twinks, between broken bloodied teeth, screamed out into the night. The pain he had suffered in his life had not been like this.
The clown ripped his chainsaw down through Twinks leg, and the gurgling of blood and bone erupted into Twinks ear drum. Suddenly, a hot substance erupted up into his throat and spewed on the pavement in front of Twinks. He saw this was his own blood, and the hot substance was followed by a raw burning in his stomach. There Twinks lay, in his on blood and puke, beyond chainsawed by a pyscho clown. The clown erupted into pyschotic laughter and finished cutting through Twinks bone. The pain was insane. The burning, oh Christ, it couldn't stop. It was unmeasurable, more horrible then Twinks had ever felt.
The clown then made his way up to Twinks blood stained face and picked it up.
Twinks saw the insane clown looking at Twinks him, and the clowns face reflected the moonlight. He wore a white paint, all over his face, and highlighted his eyes with a dark, blood red. His hair was red and resembled an afro. The clown gave Twinks a smile, and smacked him on the cheek. The Clowns outfit wasn't actually an outfit at all. Overalls encompassed his legs and partially his chest, and beyond that, Twinks saw that he wasn't wearing anything. The clown had turned off the chainsaw and now looked directly into Twinks eyes. His eyes. Oh Lord, his eyes. They glimmered, pyschotic. Mad. "Madasaf***in hatttaa", Twinks might of said at one point in his life. But now, with the clown sitting on top on him, and his surgically removed?body decapitated? with a chainsaw just a few moments earlier, the only thing Twinks could say was,
"Just...f***ing..why..dontyakill me..ya..ya.....pussy.." Twinks mumbled, and erupted a spurt of bright red blood, onto the clown's pale face.
"Sounds like a plan!" The clown was smiling now, his white teeth resembled the same tone as his pale skin. Twinks blood had spatted across the face of the clown, and was now dripping down his face. The clown licked the blood from around his lips, and cackled.
"Let the fun begin."
Flow: This story seemed to flow pretty well; the opening for the man was good. The clown randomly coming in was a little out there, but maybe that's what you were going for. You never explained the clown and his relation to the man, so you might want to try that.
Structure: You broke it into paragraphs very well, but I was confused by the last sentence, "let the fun begin." What fun was he talking about? Is he just saying that because he's a psycho? But you moved into paragraphs well.
Overall: If this story was meant to creep me out, you succeeded. It was definitely not like anything I've ever read before; it was dark and disturbing. But I know you like that kind of writing, so it definitely fit that. Let's just say it definitely fits its genres. Overall, it was pretty good. Next time, just run spell check before you finish editting and read your sentences out loud to yourself and see how they sound to you.
Keep writing!
 VB
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