You have very valid points on homeschooling, but I think, to make it even for though provoking, you could either add points on how public school is more beneficial or your own personal experience. This way it would be even more relatable than it is now. Over all it is a very good eye opener!
I love this poem! It is very though provoking through to the end and I wanted to read all of it to find out what it was saying!! The only thing I would say it to put in some punctuation or show a dramatic pause: it would make it even more mysterious and exciting. I would not be surprised if you made "sequels" to this (relating to the theme).
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