The Importance of a Foundation...

What is a foundation?

A foundation is the basis on which a thing stands, is founded, or is supported. Foundations are very important because once a foundation is laid, and if laid properly, it will not be destroyed. When it comes to relationships, I can’t help but wonder how many of us take the time and energy to build a foundation?

When meeting someone for the first time, what are your intentions? Is it to be his or her friend? Is it to get into his or her pants? Is it to start a relationship? Once again, what are your intentions?

I’ve learned that if a friendship foundation isn’t laid properly, the structure will not stand and will eventually come tumbling down.

I am sure that most of you have been asked this question before (because I know I have), “What do you look for in a significant other?”, and I can’t help but wonder how others would answer this question?

I always find it funny how most people will go into the physical aspect of this question before the internal aspect of this question. I can let you know right then and there…unstable foundation!

I can honestly say that an emphasis on looks isn’t really all that important to me. Please don’t misunderstand, I am well aware that it is important to be attracted to the person you are with; however, attractions can be established by more than just looks.

I try to encourage all who I come in counter with to establish a friendship with someone who they are potentially attracted to. Everyone at some point or another wants to find that special someone, so why rush? If you can eliminate the extra heartache or drama in your life, why wouldn’t you?

Think about it, if the person can’t take the time to be your friend, and the demands on a friendship are not nearly as severe as those in a relationship, what makes you think the person will be able to handle the necessary responsibilities of being your boyfriend or girlfriend?

If you don’t start off as friends and shoot straight for the relationship and the relationship fails, you have nothing to fall back on; and, therefore, it is a waste of time and most importantly, a waste of YOU. Every time you are in a relationship, you give a piece of yourself away, which you can never get back.

When you are friends with someone first, you see that person for who he or she really is. You will be able to fully see the beauty of the individual, inside and out and if you soon realize that you and this person click on another level besides the friendship, your foundation will have already been established, therefore, making way for the structure of an intimate relationship to be built.

In closing – the most important thing to remember is that a friendship foundation is the key to building a stable structure!


A woman of substance,
Miss Lovelee