Kisses Melted Away

I'm not lonely. If I were lonely, you would know. I'm slowly getting used to this queen size bed that is too large for just one, but once perfect for two. I'm slowly getting used to the quiet nights spent tossing & turning with no one to talk to except for my nagging mother who is always calling. I'm slowly getting used to a lot of things but in no way am I lonely.
I don't miss you either. If I did .. well, I probably wouldn't tell you on account of my pride. But that's besides the fact, I still don't miss you. I don't miss that heavy cologne you drenched yourself with in the morning. I don't miss the chocolate kisses you melted in my coffee before I woke up. & I certainly don't miss your toothbrush sitting next to mine in the toothbrush cup. I absolutely do not miss you.
She's a nice girl. The kind you tell your mom about as soon as your first date is over. The kind you think is "the one". She's great & gorgeous & tall & thin. Yeah, you're lucky.
It's been a little over two months yet I've seen you two more than I'd ever like to see in my life. It's a constant reminder of what I used to have. Each & every accidental run in, I endure the pain you unknowingly inflict. I smile at you, you smile at her, she smiles at you. It's never ending.
I'm not lonely. I don't miss you. I'm not brokenhearted. Telling myself that is the only way to push past, even if it's lying.