Disparaged Affair

She knew, but of course I know that is impossible. Motionless she sat their. The black strap from her outfit draped carelessly over the corner of the chair. The dark blue of her eye ravaged my being. I made a mistake. She could not punish me, I knew that. Yet I was ashamed and tormented. Whenever I though beauty before, she was there with me. This morning I thought, no. Yesterday, we frolicked endlessly. What could today have been, but more of the same? I crave diversity. I did not know, when I made that cruel decision this morning, I would be regretting it so soon. Like so many times before, I shall have to learn by my mistakes; I left my camera home.
Go ahead, get it out of your system; I have been called worse. It should show you, to what extent, I will go, to capture your attention—I value it, that much. Stick with me though, I promise this is going to get, interesting.
Admit it, you have done it too. A few events reoccur and… boring. You don’t even give the day a chance. Well listen up, these days are passing fast. I have seen a lot of them. You know what? Not one of them has been the same. Perception is the problem. We see what we believe. We enter each day with our mind made up. Thank God for dreams, our sanctuary from the intolerable sameness.
So what you ask has brought on these feelings of anguish and remorse or more succinctly what’s this thing you have with your camera? I just blew it. It was overcast when I started toward Deindorfer wood. It was bone chilling cold and you could smell the wood being burned in some fire places of people seeking respite from the cold. The snow was still heavy on the trees and yet it had rained then froze adding a new glimmer to our morning walk. Buddy stepped tenuously in the snow; his paws broke through making every step a crunchy surprise.
Then the sun stepped out from behind a cloud and I was instantly transported to Oz. A cranberry bush waved patriotically in a reflection of the sky. When I looked to the gold and silver tiara of the tree tops an eagle drifted by to a point where a V of geese came into view upon his shoulder. Certainly, the awe of the moment is emblazoned upon my mind, but where is my camera? At that moment, I felt that immolation would be too good for me. I shall never pass this way again and I can never share one scintilla of that moment. The thought grew like a giant icicle on my brain and I labored to make my way around the wood. Then I thought, not one crunchy step I take, in this forest will ever be repeated. If I fail to see the wonder of the moment, it is my attitude that has served to make me blind. My attitudes the crime, my blindness is the penance. We all can share the tiniest moment of our lives and it may be a gaping window to others. Every moment is precious and beyond our comprehension.
Please help me. I want to write so bad and unfortunately thats all I ever write.