Crowd at the Lottery

“Crowd at the Lottery”

I‘ll admit I am not the wisest man and I have done some pretty stupid things when I was young. It‘s frightening to think what bliss and pleasantries can be turned into losses and despair in minutes when you have hours to mess with. This memory of mine has popped back up recently, I am not sure if it was a dream or not, and I‘d thought I replay it through my head. I remember when I was an educated idiot.

I just saw myself, Jason, strolling down a dark alley lit by street lamps and alley lights during the night. The air was pushing cold against my face and the ground was littered with trash as same as the walls with their ancient posters. It was just supposed to be refresher walk in the city, but I could not stop myself from entering that alley. At the end of this outside hallway came a dark green door. I opened it out of my curiosity and bad interest. I was not smart when I was young.

A old bald fat man with a thinning mustache (likely in his 40’s) was sitting on the floor throwing down dice and repeating the process many times before taking notice of me.

“Who might you be?” he snorted loudly. I was taken back by how loudly he spoke and was honestly a little disgusted with his actions. I told him my name in a kinder and calmer tone. Of course, I wanted to know why this husky man was sitting here in the dark throwing dice.

“Why are you sitting here all by your lonesome?” I asked. After I asked he got off his fat butt and went to one of the darkest corners and flipped on a switch. A dim lamp poured a yellowish stream of light over the green ripped wall paper. It was an cramped, empty room, and nothing more.

That fat man was all smiles and he welcomed me so. He invited me in. I shut the door and sat on the floor with him, and for some reason there was a ton of ripped magazine pages on the floor.

“Would you like to play a game with me? This here is the back exit of a casino and you could hit it big with me seeing I’ma employee! I was just practicing seeing it as something to do after hours and all.” he scoffed. He tilted his head back and let out a rather loud laugh for something not worth laughing about. “I am rather lonely and bored here. I have a bunch of money here you could win.” He raised an eyebrow and flashed a smile.

I felt rather insulted and stated: “Would it be alright seeing you‘re an employee off hours after hours? Somebody should report you and get you put of here. Why are you sitting here in the back of a casino throwing dice at the floor? You should be fired just for leaving that door unlocked for any one thug to walk in.”

“Well this isn’t stolen, I’m an employee just trying to practice for our customers. Maybe you can get me a rise feller. Why give up on such a big opportunity to retire so early? Just set down with me and I will show you the easy way out.” This time that man was turning his head to one side and rising an eyebrow.

I thought it would be ok since he is an employee, but then again I was thinking as straight as much as there is a child‘s worth of common sense. The game went on anyways. “Alright” I says. “Go fetch whatever you need and I will be more than willing to gamble a gain.”

With a loud ’Haw!’, and a couple claps of the hands, he exited through another door to the left. It only took him a couple of minutes before he came back with several decks of cards, a black box and two dice. We both sat on the floor and shook hands real nice.

“My name is Jim” he said. “It’s the cards that might con you, not me. Now I am going to explain this to you so listen up. I invented this little game called Risk and there are many choices you can make. Now you tell me what you want to do as this game is your choice. You can either play a big risk and win or lose, or you can play small risk where you are almost guaranteed to win every single time. And the final choice is to be in between. Take your pick.”

I ruffled in the pockets of my black dress jeans and found out I had ten dollars in a single bill. The idea of to winning my way riches on a practical guarantee was to intriguing, so I stated ‘With little to lose I believe I should begin with little to win.’ with a bit of nervousness in my voice. My heart was pumping at such a big gamble of everything I had.

He laid down a deck of cards to my right and picked up the two dice. He was mighty smiley for someone who says they would lose it all for the sake of a boredom killer. He licked his lips and told me the rules of the level:

“You put down your bet in the center of the floor and I will shoot the dice. Anything higher than five is a win and anything lower is a lose. You pick up a card from your deck and hope it is something good. I will pay you according to the percent on the card.”

I put the ten bucks on the floor knowing it was not much to lose and the only thing I have to lose. He shot the dice and it came up seven. I was ecstatic! I picked up a card with my excited hands and it read, “1%” and nothing more. Jim did some calculating on his calculator he pulled from his black box and threw ten cents right at my bill. Unhappy with the winnings, but with the guarantee, I pressed on. Jim was just smiling like nothing in the world meant more to him than this moment.

I pocketed the ten cents and left the bill laying. Jim took up the dice and threw it down; this time tossing a four. I picked up my card which said: “20%”! Jim stole away the bill and traded it for a five and three ones.

“What’s all this then?” I said pressing my palms to the floor. “What is guarantee? A lie or impossibility?”. Jim kept smiling away. He scratched the whiskers on his face and stated:

“One or two shots doesn’t determine the future boy. You have to keep on trying before you see your hard work. Instant satisfaction, that’s your problem.”

I calmed down again and pocketed the three dollars and left the five laying there. Jim tossed an eight this time around and I drew a card. It had a payoff of 5% . Jim punched the figures in his calculator again and tossed a quarter at the bill.

And that one game, is how hours may have been spent. Time didn‘t have a definition right then, like during a good film. I eventually worked my way up to a thousand dollars and Jim kept on smiling like he wasn’t losing. Card after card I picked up; I was getting that gamble itch and wanted some more money.

Wiping the sweat of my brow I asked “When are we going to push up the risk?”. Jim never seemed to stop smiling.

“Well, getting a little wiggly eh? We move up whenever you want to. Playing low risk is what the majority of people do in life. You play it safe and you get yours, but so slowly and patiently. You never have to do much for it either, just a guess away. Want to be just above that?”

I nodded quickly and the sweat seemed to mask my face. My heart kept beating so hard and I was eager. Jim pulled in my cards and gave me two sets of decks this time. I was bewildered. Before I could ask he explained:

“Now everything is the same except you have two decks to pick from, the one on your left meaning being a product of the environment and the one on your right being following oneself. One being riskier than the other, then again, you like risks don’t you? What’s your name again?”

“Jason”

“My fine mistake Jason.”

I pocketed half of the spoils and that old smiling Jim threw his dice again and landed a five, so he rolled again after a large ‘Haw!’. The second roll came a perfect nine. I decided to pull a card from the right and it said “20%“. Jim punched in his figures and threw a hundred dollars at my five hundred. The next roll I left the money laying and the dice landed a six. I pulled a pay of 2% out of the left deck. Jim tossed twelve bucks at the spoil pile.

And once again, it seems like the second eternity came to pass. I learned really quickly that the odds improved well if I went with the right deck as opposed to the left deck. Following yourself has more passion and is a cause for more effort, so it all pays out in the end whereas regular jobs just pay you straight and there are more-than-likely layoffs or replacements there like snapping your fingers.

This time with over fifty-thousand dollars, I was ready to risk it up. Jim has never stopped smiling. We have been sitting there on those ripped up magazine pages (Which ruffled with every movement annoyingly).

I slid my hand across my forehead in preparation to the big question: “Think I am ready. I want to go all the way. I had little to lose in the beginning, so I should not worry about now. Go for it Jim. Hit me up.”

Jim gave off a silly ‘A heh heh heh heh’ and stole back my two decks into their black box home. Jim this time gave me three decks. Jim kept on smiling and that did not do me any better.

“Dogs, that’s all we are.” Jim says. “Dogs are all the same. We all act the same way to the same things and we all want the same thing and are willing to do the same thing to get it. Being unique is a rarity. Lets take a group of dogs and lock them in a room.”

What randomness that was. Confused, I had to ask: “Where did you come up with that? That has nothing to do with what is going on right now.”

Jim started to make this tearing gesture with his hands. He kept on with his little speech as if I had said nothing. “I will place a darn steak in the center of that room and lord they will all grab at each other’s neck in hopes of owning all of the steak. That’s what happens when you have present opportunity. But if a man was holding that steak and asking the dogs to do something, they would all do the same recycled acts; sit, stay and lie down. Thus it is sad only several dogs around the world have unique talents.”

Jim laid the three decks in front of me. I did not know what to do. I could have ran with the 50-thousand, but youth robs me of my common sense. The left and right deck were the same as the last two (States Jim), but the third center deck was supposedly “Oneself alone”. Jim threw his dice, with a straight face this time, as if he has upset himself with his own lecture. The dice landed all ‘click ruffle click’ on a magazine page and stopped on snake eyes. I drew a card from the center deck.

That was regret right there. Gambling has taught me following others lead to a cutthroat competition of goals, having to accept what little you can gain; whereas being yourself is not a certain guarantee for success. You either win or you don’t. What the world wants is not an original want I can tell you, the world rarely tolerates oneself alone.

Those last few minutes of my stupidity, I sat there looking at Jim with the stiff expression. Finding out they he has proven his point with gambling. Even those he had an extravagant amount to work with, he has gained very little from such hours of play. He is a man with ten bucks extra, and nothing more.