Blue and Black Nights

Walking out the door of the old two-family house that night seemed no different than any other night. It was 11:30 and pitch black. I was always early for my tour on the midnight shift. The five minute drive north to the police station was quiet, no cars on the road which seemed strange for a Thursday night. I walked in and glanced at my Sergeant, Sergeant Brian Dawson, sitting at his desk as he made up the schedule. He barely looked over his glasses as I passed by his office doors. He had been on twenty-five years or so and seen all types of action. He had a lot to teach and I certainly had a lot to learn. As the saying went, “The Sarge has more time in the shithouse than you have on the street, Nathen.” Well, it was true I had only been on the street about a year.
“Morning Nathen,” he said without looking up.
“Morning, Sarge.” I walked into reports to check the daily log and my emails.

Just as my screen beeped, LOGGED ON, the phone rang in the Sergeant’s office. It was 11:45 and most of the 4-12 shift was already in the station, their gear in the back hall waiting to be taken home for the night.
“Nathen, grab a car, ROLLOVER on Valley Rd.”
“OK Sarge,”

I ran to roll call for the cruiser keys. I headed down the hallway toward the back door as I saw Jason heading to roll call. We had been partners through the academy and it continued on throughout our midnight shift assignment.
“Let’s Go Jason!” as I grabbed my bag of gear. I had everything from flashlights and maps, to aspirin and breathing masks in my gear bag. I ran out the back door and I heard Jason yelling to Sergeant Dawson, “I’ll jump in with Nathen”.

We each threw our gear bags in the back seat and jumped into our respective seats. I always drove and Jason was my passenger/partner. We had no rhyme or reason for it, just ended up that way since we started together. I think he drove once or twice, but usually it was me behind the wheel. I tore out of the Sally port and Jason cranked up the siren, blue lights and wig wags to let them know we’re coming. No cars on the road let us get to Valley Road fast. We made the left turn on to the country road and began looking for the car accident. This road was windy, hilly, and cars drove way too fast. We always had accidents down there, and I had been to a lot of them since I had started in 1998.
“Control we’ll be out, just past Pleasant Road, I’ll let you know on injuries” Jason told our dispatcher as I grabbed the medical bag and exited the cruiser. I approached the mangled piece of metal with the HONDA symbol on the back. It looked bad, and I wasn’t even at the car yet. I got my gloves on and there was a man I recognized in the passenger side of the car trying to help. He was an off-duty State Trooper. The Honda that tried to drive through a telephone pole in front of his house had obviously woken him from his sleep. “She’s bad,” he said, as he let me in to assess the victim. I climbed into the passenger seat and the driver was slumped over toward the center of the car. The girl was gasping for air. Blood was everywhere and there was a steady stream coming from the head and mouth. I moved her hair back to get to her face and realized half the jaw was smashed into pieces. I tried to open the airway, as the gasps became wheezes and moans. As I swept the mouth I watched teeth fall into the consoles cup holder like Tic Tacs hitting the floor. The sounds coming from this poor girl were of death. The moans, the gasps it seemed as if it was over already.
“Where’s the fucking Ambulance,” as I glared back at Jason. There was no room for him to get in and I needed help. She needed help.
Jason got on the radio;
“Unit 122 to control.”
“Control’s on go ahead 122”
“Control, one victim female, serious injuries, unconscious, difficulty breathing, got an ETA on our ambulance?”
“Received, Unit 122, they just turned on to Valley, 1 minute, 1 minute.”
All I could do was hold her up so she could continue to gasp for air.

A few years back when I worked on a farm I was around during the slaughter of a bull or two. I also used to hunt and have been there when an animal has taken it’s last breath. There is a moan that accompanies death sometimes and I have heard it on certain occasions. Some people call it a death moan for obvious reasons. I heard it escape from deep inside her. She’s dying I thought to myself, she can’t make it. She’s all done.

The ambulance and Fire department arrived simultaneously and medical personnel swarmed the car.
“What do we got?” they asked me.
“She’s out cold, barely breathing and the driver’s door is crunched. She may be pinned.”
I exited the car and a paramedic jumped into the passenger seat. I backed up toward my cruiser with my medical bag. I took out my hand cleaner and began wiping the blood from my arms. They say it stops the AIDS virus so I globbed it on and rubbed it in. The smell of hot anti-freeze permeated the air from her radiator that was embedded in the pole. Sergeant Dawson pulled up in his cruiser, “whatcha got Nathen?”

“Twenty, maybe twenty one year old female, she’s out Sarge, doesn’t look good, half her face is gone”
“Want me to call State Police for recon?”
“Whatever you think Sarge, she might not make it so we probably should.”
“ok then, you boys all set?”
“All set Sarge, Tony is getting the camera and we’ll mark the skids when the fire department clears”
The fire department and ambulance took the girl away as quickly as they had arrived on the scene. The night became blue and black from the lights on the cruisers. It was quiet again. We painted the skid marks and had the car towed after measurements were taken. Jason drove back to the station with Tony to grab another cruiser. We were short shifted tonight so we weren’t supposed to be riding together.

“Unit 122 to 144,” I called for Jason on the air.
“Go ahead 122.”
“Jason, can I meet you?”
“Sure, name it.”
“The corner of Valley at Main, five minutes, you want one?
“Yup, see you there”

I drove to the coffee shop to pick up a coffee for myself, and a hot chocolate for Jason. He never did like coffee.

“How are you tonight?” The clerk asked.
“Good, how are you tonight Sue?”
“OK, you guys busy tonight?
“Not really, it's quiet now. I’ll catch you later, got to go meet Jason.”
“Tell him I say hello, bye Nathen.”

I pulled into the lot at the corner of Main and Valley road; Jason was already waiting for me. I pulled up and handed him his hot chocolate. We both sat there not saying a word.

The adrenaline was gone. Reality was setting in. Two officers went to her parents home telling them to go to the hospital. Their daughter has just been in an accident.

"That was bad,” I said to Jason.

“I know, I could see it in your face when you asked about the ambulance, I knew it was bad.”

“She’s dead, do you think she ‘s dead, I think she’s dead what do you think, twenty maybe? Twenty one?” I asked.

I think she’s twenty one” Jason replied.

We heard later that she wasn’t dead. She lived through it. I only heard rumors months later but I knew she lived through it. State Police never followed up with me so she couldn’t have been dead. John, a dispatcher who worked in my department knew her and gave me updates once in a while. She spent half of 1999 and 2000 with parts of her body outside of herself. Her stomach was all messed up and she had a bag attached to her. But at least she was alive. I never thought she would have made it past the helicopter ride.

“Control to one thirty three and one thirty four domestic in progress 1075 Main Street bottom floor, I lost contact with the caller on 911”
“one thirty-three received”
“one thirty-four received”
“one forty-four to control I’m in front of that building, I’ll be out, I’ll let you know what I got”

I had made detective in January 2002 and got my new call sign, I was “one forty-four.” I went to the bottom floor and I knew the apartment. I had locked plenty of people up out of here; this building was a rat’s nest of criminals. The top of the door had three panes of glass and I could see inside. I noticed a girl talking to a man in the hall. She backed up into a room and he began punching into the room. It looked like he was holding her with his other hand. I knew he was punching her. I kicked the door in and rushed the shocked man. I threw him onto the ground and began a wrestling match while I handcuffed him for assault and battery. John and Jimmy came through the door as I had begun dragging the defendant to the door. “I handed him to Jimmy, as the male continued to yell, “fuck you, I did nothing, motherfucker”. Jimmy pulled him out the door and I went with him. We threw him into a cruiser and Jimmy took him to be booked at the station. I walked back inside the apartment. John took care of the victim who was still crying and upset, but she wasn’t hurt badly. This was John the dispatcher who had finally become a cop. I was his training officer when he first started and he was a sharp kid. He would become a great cop. I asked him how the girl was and he replied, “A few scrapes and bruises but she’ll be fine.” Then he began a conversation with her while I was about to walk out of the apartment. No need for me there, patrol would handle the report, but I stopped and listened.

John said to her, “you’re Jana right?
“Yes, you know me?” she looked a little puzzled.
“Yeah, I know you, you remember him?” Nodding in my direction.
“No should I?” she asked.
“Yeah, that’s the guy who saved your life” he said with his somewhat sarcastic air he has.
“Oh my God” She began to cry uncontrollably; shaking, she walked over to me in the living room. “You’re Nathen?” She asked.
“Yes” I said.
“You did it again.”
“Did what?” I asked. I honestly had no idea who this girl was or what she was talking about.
“You saved my life a second time, he would have killed me”

My mind drew a blank I had no idea who this girl was. Even after John told me her name it didn’t ring any bells. Maybe I blocked it out.

“How do I know you?” I asked.
“I crashed my car a few years ago on Valley Road, everyone always told me you saved my life, thank you so much, thank you so much” She hugged me and cried some more, “you must be my protector, you’re always there when I need you. Thank you, Thank you.”

I walked out the door with a strange feeling that night. It was almost that same sick feeling after the crash but there was something else too. I guess it was a good feeling that someone appreciated a cop at that moment. Someone thanked me for what I do; and she meant it. She didn’t forget who I was; as most people do. Now I guess I wouldn’t forget her either.