A trilogy

Firewater

When the firewater comes
I drink to be warmed, not to be consumed

And as those who burn complete
find themselves
cleansed
reborn
like the pheonix
though they know not why

My blistered skin
still flames and itches long after
with knowledge I did not want,
an emotional hangover that coffee cannot overcome

Maybe one day
I'll dive into the sun



Hidden Messages

With teeth
I paint flags onto my skin

A strip of ghostly white
between two thick bands of magenta

Don't break it
Bruise if you must

My knuckles burn
The dark pressure overwhelms me.
In the morning, no one will ever know



Stained

Just as the ink of this pen now stains my fingers
The black dye crawling between pale skin cells
The words he said last night, and those he said, too, and him,
Cling to my brain and coat my nerves

You're an anomaly
You're too amazing to date me
I like you're eyes
Only a fuck-up would date me
Let's go to Mars and raise goats
Your freckles suit you
I love her
or her
or her
(but not you, he means.
That's what they all really mean -
not you)
I'm so depressed
(he says)
Will you
(someone else - never me)
kiss me?

I can scrub my fingers raw and the ink will trickle down the drain
But those words are seared in scar tissue I'll always have

I wish I could scrub the words out
And leave the ink instead