To Whom it May Concern

To Whom It May Concern:
I was out with my friends last night having a couple of drinks. It was nothing out of the ordinary. I was just enjoying the company of people that think a like. We toasted to things we had toasted before and had the debates than ended in the agreements that disagreed. When, without warning, a feeling of new seemed to over take the feeling of routine.
It started with a simple question. A question I have been asked a million times. A simple grouping of words that have been thrown around bar taverns and dinner tables countless of times. What are you thinking?
You may start asking yourself what is so great about that question. It’s a question that has started many first date conversations. It’s one of the simplest yet effective ice breakers known to man. You’re right this question was not profound. It was my answer that changed my life completely.
It was the answer that has become my life’s definition. Without sign of nearing or so much as a prelude to let me know of what’s to come I was no longer the man that ordered the drink in my hand. But the person that placed the half drunk bottle on the table with a push as to signal the end of a long night.
I no longer wanted to be there. The songs that used to reenergize me with just the first few chords seem redundant and bland. The jokes that used to make me chuckle seem to have lost there punch. The drinks that used to quench my thirst now leave me craving something more fulfilling.
I didn’t belong there anymore. In a split second, I became a square peg jammed in a circle shaped hole. The music is now a little too loud and the funniest guy I ever knew stopped making me laugh. The girl that brought me my drinks with a smile now seems to just be waiting for her shift to end.
As I went through my goodnights with friends whose faces were as familiar as the aches and pains of a morning after a well played night, I shook a little harder and hugged a little tighter. I took my time looking at them almost like taking snap shots with my mind as my goodnights turned to goodbyes.
Listening to my keys jingle as I made my way up my porch the awkwardness of the night seemed to dissipate. What was I thinking? In a word, the answer would be “home”. I was thinking of a quiet night with the Mrs. I was thinking of my daughter that I didn’t tuck in that night. I was thinking of all things I haven’t done to do the things I do all the time.
I haven’t read my daughter a story to put her to bed but I can’t tell you how many times I have read the advertisement of the urinals in a bar bathroom. I have told a friend how great he or she was after too many but I haven’t spent the night telling my wife how great she was after getting more than I deserve of her that day. My life had become a “been there done that” kind of world and it was time to experience the new.
As I quietly slipped in to bed, my wife turned over and said, “You’re home early” with a wink and a smile. All that matter is she said, “ I was home”.