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the continuation of Club 116 |
Chapter 8 Displaying Anger There were a couple of occasions in which I displayed these personality traits of short temperedness and offensiveness, and sure there were a couple of huge arguments among the group, but there were not very many at all. Another time, about November, we had another party. We all bought our own alcohol this time, and no one was to drink each other’s alcohol unless we had permission. It would have worked out fine. But of course, it did not. I bought a bottle of Absolut, and gave Zack permission to drink some of it. He had about two shots while I was in the room, and I had one. Then I left with Zack for about ten minutes, to come back and find that I only had less than a shot left. I was fuming. On my way back with Zack, I saw Darsen. She was leaning over a railing, crying. “What the hell happened?” I asked “Buddy kicked me out.” She replied. “Why?” “Just because I was stupid when I was drunk once, on Halloween, now everyone hates me for it and says I’m being drunk and stupid but I’m not. I’m not even drunk!” She said. I was getting even more furious, because she wasn’t drunk, and I knew that for a fact. “Okay, well let’s go to Stefan’s room, since that’s where they all are and get this shit straight.” “No, I don’t want to see any of them.” “Buddy can’t kick you out of Stefan’s room, it’s not his room, remember?” “Okay.” So we walked up to Stefan’s and we went in. Buddy walked up to me. “Get her the fuck out of here. NOW.” “NO! She’s not even drunk, and this isn’t your room to be kicking her out of; Stefan said she could be here, so she is. You don’t want her here, then you leave.” “Fine.” He walked out and I felt accomplished. But then I realized I had been forgetful, and left my keys in Buddy’s room. I walked out and saw him sitting by the door. “I need my keys.” I said, feeling stupid for asking for something while I was mad at him. “Let’s go.” He replied. As we were walking down the hallway, I was still fuming at him. “You know you’re going to regret everything you said today, cause you’re being drunk and mean.” I mentioned. “Shut the fuck up you stupid bitch!” He screamed back at me. “Fuck you, you fucking asshole piece of shit!” I tended to say: “fuck” a lot when I was angry. We walked into his room, and I saw Sam, Brendon, and Chico sitting there. I grabbed my keys and then went to grab my Absolut and my orange juice, but I realized someone drank both cartons of my orange juice, also. “Who the fuck drank my shit?!” I screamed. “Some black kid that walked in here.” Sam replied. “Yeah fucking right. I didn’t drink any of your shit, why you gotta fuck with mine for?” I said. “It wasn’t us, it was Zack.” Chico said. “Yeah ok, Zack was with me the whole time.” I slammed the orange juice container against the wall. “Krystal… I think it’s time for you to be kicked out…” Sam said. “No, you wanna fucking kick me out then fucking do it, you know what here, ill save you the goddamn trouble and kick my fucking self out.” I answered. I walked out and slammed the door. I walked up to my room and went into the bathroom. I locked the door, and leaned against the wall. I slid down the wall to my knees and cried. I just cursed my best friend out, and was mad at everyone I knew of as friends. I walked back to my room in the pitch black and grabbed the bag of plastic silverware I was hiding from my roommate, and headed back to the bathroom. I tried cutting with every sharp thing I could find, and succeeded only slightly. Buddy found out what I was doing, and came upstairs to my room, banging on the front door. I did not hear him, and just continued what I was doing. He got mad at me for about a week. Eventually I told him it was my habit, and my problem, and had nothing to do with him so he should not be mad at me for it. At least someone cared about me, though, even if we were mad at each other. That was the only big fight all of us had ever gotten into. Chapter 9 Hurricane Wilma Hits Florida The week before Halloween, a hurricane was expected to hit. It was Hurricane Wilma, to be exact. Many people left the dorms and sought out shelter at home, while the rest of us stayed at the dorms waiting for notice of evacuation. I wanted to go home, but my mother was being stubborn and would not let me. She told me “You want to be on your own and be independent, then here you go.” I was convinced she did not want me there, so I did not bother any more. The only people left at Bay Vista that I knew were Sam, Milen, Stefan, and Jessika. Sam and I decided we would get drunk and hang out since we were really the only ones going to be there, and Stefan and Jessika were leaving the next day. That changed, however, when he met three girls that wanted to go to the beach and he did not invite me. Jessika and I went over to Milen’s room later on to see what Sam and Stefan were doing. We went in and the three girls got angry that we were there, so we left. The next day, Sunday, we got evacuated. Jessika went home and Stefan went to a friend’s house. The rest of us loaded onto the buses and got sent to South Campus at University Park. That night we were told we had to sleep on the floors of Everglades Hall’s lounges. I made a few phone calls and got to sleep in my friend Gabe’s bed since he was not there. I hung out with his suitemate that night, Jonathan. We walked over to the Apartments with some of his friends and drank and smoked for a while before heading back. So I spent the night in Panther Hall in a nice comfortable bed and then headed back to the rest of the evacuees on Monday to sleep on the floors, after the hurricane came and caused the power to go out. I woke Sam up and went with him, Shane (a tall, lanky, white gangster looking guy from Washington that played the drums fantastically), Janishia (a freeloader from New Jersey with an awesome singing voice), and Milen to find an ATM machine and food. We found both, and when we got back to Everglades Hall, we ate in a pitch-black lounge room so that no one would attack us for food. Later, the three girls from the other night that Sam went to the beach with showed up, and we started talking. We became friends eventually, and that night we sat around on the fifth floor lounge playing truth or dare and getting to know each other better. I went to sleep on the floor of the fifth floor lounge that night, and awoke to Milen moving closer and closer to me on the floor. I was literally against the wall, but I was comfortable and tired, and I did not care. We slept the majority of the time that we were there since we had nothing better to do. The last night, Tuesday night, was probably the best night of the shelter. The three girls and I: Darsen (a Haitian from North Lauderdale, near where my aunt lived, that is really crazy when she is drunk), Jennifer (a Honduran from Orlando), and Ashley (a white Hispanic skinny girl from Washington) ran out of clean clothes and went to the 99-cent store to buy new ones. We came out with matching beer pants and children’s size T-shirts. Later that night, we hung out with these geeks that lived in the dorm we were staying at, and they supplied us with free alcohol. We got pretty drunk that night and walked to all the residence halls. The wind picked up a lot and it got pretty cold outside. We went back to the guys and hung out for a while upstairs. Sam made friends with this kid Patrick (a white kid that did not know how to swim, from Minnesota), and so we started talking to him too. We got caught drinking that night because of Darsen; she brought some random guy back to Everglades and was all over him, and she disappeared out of our watchful eyes and passed the front desk with him, and since all four of us girls were wearing the same pajama pants, they figured we were all drinking together, since she proved to be pretty drunk. I know for a fact that both Darsen and I reeked of Vodka. My Resident Assistant, Jodi Kay came upstairs and made us all go back to the second floor to sleep with everyone else. Ever since that day, the woman in charge of housing, Ro Anne, and all of the Resident Assistants were not too fond of us and were always giving us dirty looks. We went to sleep early that night, and the last thing I remember before falling asleep was Darsen screaming: “I hate that bitch! She fucked up my game!” The next morning, the power came back on early. I remember going down to the bathroom on the first floor with the girls and going into it without realizing that the light was on, and we just said “Hello?” and then flipped the light switch once or twice as if we did not believe it. I walked in to go to the bathroom, looked at my reflection in the mirror, and turned the light back off; it had been days since I was able to look in a mirror, and I looked horrible. A few hours later, we packed up and were getting ready to leave. I was talking to Dan, another R.A. and he laughed at our incident from the night before and said we were lucky we did not get into more trouble than that. My phone finally charged and I made one single phone call to let someone know I was okay. It was not to my mother or to my father; it was to Buddy. I called him and told him I was all right and that he was the only person I called. He told me I was crazy to call him before family, but if my family did not care enough about me to want me home during this storm, then why would they want to know if I was okay or not now? Buddy was like my big brother, he was family, and as long as he was not worried about me, it did not matter. We loaded up onto the buses on the brisk Wednesday afternoon (the temperature had dropped severely since the storm), and headed back to Bay Vista. The damage was phenomenal, trees were down everywhere on the woodsy path that lead to our campus, gas stations, and stores were without roofs and were completely damaged. A car that was located in our parking lot over the course of the past four days had its windshield completely caved in by a tree that fell. My mother had called and told me that Broward County was not getting power back for another two weeks. I have heard of worse storms hitting, but this was probably the worst hurricane I had ever actually seen hit Florida. After being in a hurricane shelter for 4 days, showering and using the restroom in the dark, cold showers in other people’s dorm rooms, eating old food that was around for days, was cold, and made us sick, and sleeping on the floor with nothing but a blanket and pillow, I cherished my bed, and my air conditioner. The food we were provided with at the shelter may have sounded and looked disgusting, but I know that all of us had never tasted better food than the food we were given, since we were so hungry. Everything we received was the best we have ever had. We learned to appreciate a lot from that situation, and next time, we were going to be more prepared. It was a lot of fun though, staying in the shelter with the rest of the people on my campus. I met more people, established a bond with those I already knew, and made a lot of memories there as well. Chapter 10 Public Showering I got back to my room, and lay on my bed for what seemed like an hour, just enjoying it. I headed into the bathroom after a while to unpack some of my toiletries, when the smell hit me. My bathroom smelled like someone had died in there. I looked around only to realize my roommate’s underwear were on the floor, brown and covered with flies. It was probably the grossest and most disturbing thing I have ever seen. I knew she showered in her underwear, and that was not my problem, it was her choice to stink, not mine. But the fact that she would leave her dirty underwear there like that was my problem. I went down to the front desk to ask what I should do about it, and they said I had to get rid of them otherwise I would get maggots in my shower. I figured, Vanessa will be back by tomorrow; she will take care of it. I did not want to be the one to throw them away and have her get mad at me over another thing. We already had problems; we did not need any more. I had everyone from the shelter over that night and we all cooked spaghetti and had a feast. That was the first spaghetti feast of many. Everyone noticed the stench too, and said I needed to do something. Tomorrow came and I learned that the people who were not evacuated would not be allowed back into the dormitories until Sunday, so I had to do something now, especially since the stench had spread into my kitchen. It just kept getting worse, until I could not take it anymore. I got Sam to come and put them into a garbage bag for me, and I tied it to her doorknob. Since then, it never happened again, but I also never showered in there ever again either. To this day I wonder what she told her friends when they asked about it… did she say they were mine? After that incident, I showered in Buddy’s shower every day. That was not the safest place for me to shower. There was no lock on the door and so I had Sam walk in once because the guys told him there was weed in the shower, and he had believed them. “Yo, there’s weed in the bathroom.” Brendon said to Sam. “What? No, someone’s in there.” Sam replied. “Nah man, there’s weed in there, I promise.” Zack told him. He walked in and opened the shower curtain. “What the fuck?!” I screamed. He ran back out, laughing. “You fucking liars, Krystal’s in there!” That was not the first occurrence that I have been walked in on; I had Milen walk in once, saying: “I’m ready to join you now.” “Ha-ha. How ‘bout no.” I replied, talking through the thin shower curtain I was holding against the wall. “Why not?” “You know how guys’ private time is when they’re taking a shit? Well, girls’ private time is when they’re showering.” “What are you doing in there that’s so private?” He asked. “Nothing, showering is just private!” “Fine, I’ll just stand here and talk to you then.” So I dealt with him standing there having a conversation with me, with my “What?” every few words because of his accent. When I was finished showering, I grabbed my towel and came out. “Do you want me to turn around?” Milen asked. “Nah, I’m talented like that, I can change with a towel on.” I replied. “Okay, my turn.” Milen said, and proceeded to undress and climb into the shower. “It’s your turn to stand there and talk to me.” “About what?” I just wanted to leave and get ready to go to bed. “Anything.” “Fine.” I called up Darsen to come and keep me company. She came down and stood there with me, talking to Milen. When Milen was finished, he climbed out of the shower. Realizing he climbed out naked, he looked down at his naked body, and said, “Oh, I’m getting out.” Every day after that Milen kept me company, talking to me while I was in the shower. Right before I showered once, Milen, Stefan, Buddy, and Chico walked in begging me to show them my nipple ring. I said no and disagreed to do it for the first 10 minutes. Then I gave in. “Oh my god, what is the big deal? It’s a piece of metal going through a nipple!” I said. “Come on Krystal, it’s like Girls Gone Wild. You’re in college, you gotta flash people!” Stefan and Chico told me. “Ha-Ha no I don’t! ...Fine! If I do it, will you go away and let me shower?” I asked. “Yeah.” They all agreed. “Okay, one at a time, come in and I’ll show you.” It was kind of funny the way they were so shocked about a little nipple ring, and the way I just casually showed them. Guys have nipples too, so what is the difference? Chapter 11 Company For The Smokers, and The Beauty of Weston The weekend after the hurricane, Andrew came to pick Darsen, Jennifer, and I up to go to Weston for his house party. His parents were out of town, and he was going to be playing beer pong and drinking with some friends. We got there, and I needed cigarettes. Andrew never supported my habit, he would not tell me where to go or help me get there. This very young girl, about five or six years old, told me how to get to the gas station, and I proceeded to walk to it. A creepy guy in a car tried picking me up, but with my usual cautiousness, I gave him the wrong number when he asked for it. I got to the gas station and got my cigarettes, and made it back all in one piece. We went over to Town Center of Weston and ate dinner at Andrew’s former location of employment: Tarpon Bend, a restaurant that specialized in seafood. We ate, picked up the alcohol and headed back to his house. The people that showed up I knew from the last time I went to Weston with Andrew. There was Jason, Andrew, and these two other guys I knew, Adrian and Dan. After every round of beer pong that I won with Andrew, I went outside to smoke. Once Darsen and Jennifer started falling asleep, Jason left with Dan and convinced me to go with them to Jason’s house. That was when Andrew came outside. “Krystal, make sure you lock the door when you come back in.” Andrew said. “Okay.” I replied. Andrew went back into the house, and I eventually left with Jason; he had talked me into going. Andrew called him when we got to his house. I knew he would, he was jealous after all. “Where’s Krystal?” He asked. “She went with me to drop Dan at his car, I’ll bring her back in a few minutes.” Jason said. I was about to spend the night at Jason’s, but I felt that I had to go back to Andrew’s. I could not leave my two friends there without me. So I made Jason take me back. I liked being in Weston. It was like the neighborhoods you saw on television, quiet and peaceful. It was beautiful there. When I went outside to smoke at the dorms, I always sat in the same spot and saw the same people. Amanda, Corbin, Topher, Sean, Erica, Stephen, and some other select few smokers. The raccoons kept us company while we sat and talked of the stupidest things. One day, a stray dog came out of nowhere and jumped on a raccoon, attacking him. After he had successfully killed the raccoon, two more raccoons jumped out of the bushes and attacked him. It was like a gang fight between animals. Afterwards, the dog paced the door to the entrance of the dorm back and forth, whining to get in. The dog spent the night by that door, and I somewhat felt bad for the poor thing. The raccoons were always there, chomping down on something inside the garbage can. Another common visitor was Ed, the pedophile police officer. He was tall and redheaded, always eating sunflower or pumpkin seeds. He was from New York, also. He was always there, smoking his Doral cigarettes and talking to us. He was also commonly seen leaving girls’ rooms at night. He offered to give me a ride to Publix once, before the hurricane, so I could get money out of the ATM machine, but me, being smart, I turned it down. Sam was listening to our conversation and told me he would take me instead. I do not trust cops for the life of me. The only thing good about that guy was he was the coolest cop around; he did not care about anything that we did. We went down there drunk, high, everything, and he knew, but never spoke a word about it to anyone else. He was pretty much liked throughout campus, but also well known as a creep. After the party that caused the most drama, Brendon called me and asked me to come downstairs to sleep over. I showered and headed down there. Around five in the morning, I could not sleep, and I did not want Brendon to wake up not remembering that I stayed over, so I left, without my shirt on (I had lost it and could not find it in the dark.) I walked outside to smoke, and Amanda and Topher came out and asked me if I wanted to go for a really later dinner with them, and I said sure. I went to this Jewish place; it was not that bad, either. We watched the sun come up from the restaurant, and then headed back to the dorms. I went to sleep around seven that morning, not waking up the next day until around five in the afternoon. My sleep schedule always went something like that. I was correct in thinking Brendon would not remember, because when I went back the next day for my shirt, he asked me how it got there. I did not think I had to answer that at all. Chapter 12 The Halloween Party That No One Remembers Halloween came. Andrew had a big party in his room where everyone was invited, and too many people knew about it that could get us in trouble. I showed up all dressed girly and pretty. Darsen had made me up to be a really pretty girl, or maybe even a hooker. Buddy stuck a five-dollar bill in my skirt when he saw me, and the rest of the guys had a similar astonished look of approval on their faces. It made me feel astounding for the guys to think of me as an actual girl instead of another one of the “guys.” I got really drunk that night, and I remember kissing Brendon when no one was looking and stopping when someone did look. I left the room with Buddy, Stefan and a bunch of other people to go smoke a cigarette, and I remembered talking too much, but I did not remember what about. After getting back, people were talking about me and I agreed with everything they said, making myself sound horrible. Then, Zack came up to me and said “Hey, me, Stefan, and Brendon are going to get something out of Brendon’s room, come with us.” So I said O.K. and left. We got to Brendon’s and I had to go to the bathroom. I went to the bathroom and came back out. When I came back out, however, I realized everyone was gone. That was where I blacked out. The next thing I could remember was putting my shoes back on in the dark of Brendon’s room. I called him up the next day and asked what happened. “Hey. What did we do last night?” “When?” He replied. “Last night. In your room.” “You were in my room?” He asked, clueless. “You don’t remember either?” We both laughed and shrugged it off. Nothing much could have happened. We had gone back to the party after that, and I remember starting to feel sick, so I went back up to my room to go to bed. I awoke in the middle of the night half dressed and went to the bathroom to go throw up. When I walked back out I realized that my roommate had her door open and she had some people over. Embarrassed to be half dressed, I just went back to my room and went to sleep. I awoke the next day to a phone call from Darsen. “What the hell happened last night?!” She screamed. “I don’t know man, when I got back to the party you weren’t there anymore.” “How did I get changed? How did I get to my room? Why is my mattress on the floor? There are no sheets on my mattress either, and where are my clothes from last night? And oh my god! Who changed my pad?!” She must have had one crazy night. “Wow…. I have no idea.” It turns out 6 guys carried her to her room and put her to bed and three girls changed her and they got her to go to sleep. My next phone call was from Buddy. “You tell all your secrets when you’re drunk don’t you?” He said. “What are you talking about?” “What is one thing you wouldn’t tell anyone about?” He said. “Not sure.” “Well, you told everyone about your threesome with Sam and Brendon when we were sitting outside last night!” He said, laughing. “Oh my god…. I did?” “Yep, you told us all five times to be exact!” Oh well, if I regretted it, I would be foolish. It was my own fault, and I cannot regret it. Plus, it was a fun and entertaining night, so who cares? Buddy also told me something else that made me glad I had left so early… “You should be glad you left early.” “Why? Drama?” I asked. “Nah. We all got written up.” “Oh shit, really? Oh man, I’m glad I left then. Me and Darsen lucked out.” I said. “Hell yeah you did.” Being written up enough times gets you kicked out of school for good. I’m glad I was not there. Chapter 13 Olive Garden- When You’re There, You’re Family. I wanted to get a tattoo somewhere in November, and I begged Milen to take me. We all piled into the car: Milen, Brendon, Darsen, Stefan, and I. We drove out to the tattoo shop, and I got my second tattoo: a pink hibiscus flower. Milen ended up getting one, also, a Pisces sign on his wrist. We made a lot of trips to the beach in the middle of the night and we had many skinny dipping experiences, also. That was one of the plusses of Florida beaches. You are allowed on them at night, unlike New York. College held a lot of my first experiences, skinny-dipping being one of them. I started writing essays for people in school, and Andrew had been my best customer. At least it made me money outside of my two part-time jobs, and gave me something to do while everyone else was studying and pulling all-nighters. The all-nighters we pulled lasted more than all night, and these took place almost every night. I slept between work and classes during the day and stayed up maybe 4 out of the 7 nights in a week. They were fun though, I will give them that much. This was about the time that room 116 turned into Club 116, and there was a white board on the door for messages, which usually contained the names of people who were banned: Me for showering in public places, Sam for indecent exposure, Andrew for questioned sexuality, and some other certain people for certain reasons. Back on the subject of our spaghetti feasts: we would always cook spaghetti, which is probably the reason I am so sick of it now. We had spaghetti practically every night, and each night I think we used something different as an ingredient. Andrew always made undercooked spaghetti that was sticky and hard to chew; and once, Darsen and Jennifer were cooking it (I can not cook to save my life) and they ran out of sauce, so they mixed in bleu cheese and ketchup with the tomato paste. I did not notice it until they told me, but that was the weirdest spaghetti ingredient I had ever heard of. We all went to olive garden once, for normal pasta that we did not have to cook ourselves; we took two cars, one for the potheads and one for the non-smokers. In Sam’s car there was Sam, Brendon, Chico, Stefan, and Zack. In Andrew’s car, the non-smoker “Spongebob mobile” (his car was full of Spongebob (the Television show) merchandise because of his father), there was Andrew, me, Buddy, my friend Angie (she was in a F.I.G, a Freshman Interest Group, with me, and was in all of my classes so we hung out a great deal and she spent a lot of time at our parties and our dorm), and Shane. Shane did not smoke, in fact, he really did not do much; he did not smoke, drink, or curse. It was weird to meet someone like that, but I respected him for it. All in all, it was a great night to say the least; we drove the waiter crazy with all the food we ordered. I left early to stand outside and smoke a cigarette; no one else in our group was a smoker besides Stefan. Andrew said they were going to leave me, but I doubted them and said fine, then I would walk home. They got into the car and drove up to me and were telling me to get in the car. Buddy tried to convince me also, but in a sweeter tone. “Get in the car! Angie has to go back and test a chemistry test!” Andrew yelled out. “So take her! I’ll fucking walk home if you can’t wait two minutes!” I screamed back, and handed her the keys to my room. Buddy got out of the car. “Come on, just get in please.” He told me. “I’m almost done smoking. If they wanna leave me, let them, fuck them, I’ll fucking walk.” “Hurry up we’re leaving you here!” Angie yelled out to me. We thought it would be funny if Buddy lit up a cigarette right when I finished mine to piss Andrew off. He knew for a fact that Buddy did not smoke, but it got him mad anyway and Andrew drove away leaving Buddy and I at Olive Garden. Buddy did not want to walk, so I made a few phone calls to get us a ride back to campus. I finally got in touch with my friend. “Jonathan… do you wanna do me a huge favor? I’ll love you forever.” “What is it?” He asked. “Do you wanna pick me up? I’m stranded…” and I proceeded to tell him the story, and he came and got us. Buddy resented Andrew after that day. Chapter 14 Sex is For Guys Like I mentioned before, I learned how not to judge people as whores or man-whores. My opinion on Sam eventually changed, and after having as many friends with benefits as I did, I decided I am pretty much of a whore too, so who am I to judge? Since Buddy was like my older brother, he was protective of me, too. When my friend from south campus, Gabe, came to pick me up so he could give me a ride home, Buddy went with me to the car and asked Gabe two questions: “Who are you and what are your intentions with my little sister?” I have never had anyone there to be protective of me; that was another good feeling. I loved having someone who cared enough to watch out for me and be protective. I never knew what it was like to have any brothers or sisters, but Buddy made me realize how great it would be to have had one. I did not need a dad or a brother when I had Buddy, he was protective enough to make up for the both of them either not existing or just not being near me. Since everyone thought Buddy and I were either sleeping together or that we were brother and sister, it confused this one guy Chad, because he had heard both of the misconceptions. Chad was sitting outside smoking while talking to Sam. “What are Krystal and Buddy? Are they dating?” Chad asked Sam. “They’re fucking.” Sam replied. “What? I thought they were brother and sister…” Chad said. “Well, that’s how they do it in the south…” Sam said, shrugging his shoulders and smiling. Even though it gave me an incest reputation, I did not care; it was actually pretty amusing that people either thought one or the other. In fact, I did not care at all about my reputation. My reputation was horrible at school, but I do not think it affected anyone there like it did when I was back in New York. I guess in college people mature and learn that talking about people is petty and foolish and only causes more problems. Everyone minds his or her own business now, and I liked that. One night, I climbed through Brendon’s window and hopped into his bed to watch cartoons. Buddy, Sonia, and Daniella were standing outside of his room when I did it. “Ha-ha, I just got a girl specially delivered through my window!” Brendon proudly exclaimed. Buddy put his hand out. “That’ll be $26.50 please.” “She’s not worth $26.50!!” Sonia said. I had a bitterness toward her after that. A little while later, I overheard them talking about Daniella being a whore. “If Daniella’s a whore, I must be a much bigger whore than she is then.” I answered. “NOOOO! I’m a bigger whore!” she snapped, with her Trinidadian accent. If she wanted the whore title so bad, I would give it to her in a second. Someone should warn those Trinis that being a whore is not a good thing, and neither is being that skinny. Looking like a pole does not make you any more attractive. I think the guys warmed up to me so much because I am like a guy in several different ways: I hate to shop, I hate complaining, I hate people who complain, and I love sex, maybe a little too much. I went out to smoke a cigarette with Buddy one day. “I need sex.” I said, knowing I was being random. “Ha-ha you’re such a guy!” He said back. “No I’m not, I just like sex.” “Only guys like sex as much as you do, Krystal.” He told me. Then I walked back to his room where Zack, Stefan, and Shane were studying. We started a conversation about which people in school I would or would not have sex with when Sam had just walked in. Needless to say, there were a lot of people I said no to. “Who would you have sex with in Bay Vista… No never mind, its easier if you just tell us who you wouldn’t have sex with here in Bay Vista.” Buddy asked me. “I wouldn’t have sex with Andrew, Shane, Andrew’s roommate Ian, Austin, Christian, there’s a lot of people!” I replied. “Oh wow, you can count them all on one hand!” Shane said. “How about Zack?” Sam asked. “Yeah, I would.” I said. “What about Buddy?” Sam asked me. “Maybe.” I replied. “Why does Buddy get a “maybe” when Zack got a “yes”?” Stefan asked. “Because he’s like my big brother, and he’s my best friend.” I replied. “Oh, yeah that’s true, it would be weird. You should do it anyway, though, just to see what it looks like. Ha-ha I mean, feels like.” Sam said. I was not a whore. I just slept around, and got the feel for different people, I guess. Sam once told me, “Krystal, you’re not a whore. You just like sex. It’s okay to be a whore… you’re in college! What does it matter?” So it did not matter to me. Sam would come over whenever he was in the mood to do anything, Brendon would call me whenever he was drunk and in the mood to do something, and Jason, well, I saw him maybe once in a blue moon. When he came down, however, I was not even seen around the campus. Sex was not just for guys; it is just that when girls like sex too much, they are looked down upon. Chapter 15 Goodbyes Are Forever The days wound down to December, and it got closer and closer to the end of the semester. Some things happened between my mother and I that forced me to face unwanted circumstances of leaving FIU for good. I knew it was going to be depressing, but I did not know how depressing; or maybe I just did not realize how depressing until the day actually came. When it neared Christmas time, I made Zack come with me to Aventura Mall (the richest mall I had ever seen) to go see Santa. I wanted to take pictures with him, and so we did. The guy who posed as Santa looked exactly like the real one, too. “Santa, why do you look so depressed?” I said to him. “Ha-ha Santa’s not depressed. Why do you say that?” He replied back to me. “You look sad. Santa’s supposed to always be happy and smiling…” “Well, Santa’s resting his smile. He’s been smiling all day.” That day was awesome. I love Christmas time. I also made my rounds with Christmas cards that year, placing them in people’s mailboxes. Some of the cards I received were the best I have ever gotten. They held memories and true friendships, all inside one card. In all honesty, I saved every one of them. We had a couple of last parties, made a couple trips to South Campus to party, and we made a group trip to the keys with eleven people consisting of: Me, Buddy, Angie, Darsen, Jennifer, Ashley, Austin (this insignificant writer that Angie liked, but we questioned his sexuality), his roommate Christian, Patrick, Gabe from South Campus, and this guy Darsen liked named Sami. We rented two condos on the beach and bought lots of alcohol and spent the night there. When we were checking out the scenery around the condo we were staying in, I got playfully mad at Buddy. “Get the fuck off me!” “Wow, that’s probably the first time you ever said that to someone!” Buddy said. I got slightly offended, and made him apologize for it on my video camera. Austin cooked us all dinner, and we played shot checkers and went to the beach. We went swimming in the cold pool and then played spin the sandal in the hot tub. Patrick got the most action out of all of us. Angie and Darsen wound up crying during the night’s activities, but we worked those situations out. Some of us smoked some weed later on that night. It was basically all the guys except for Austin, and Ashley and I. The majority of us were high, watching the raccoons downstairs fight some cats. There were at least twenty-five raccoons below our hotel, and they were going wild. After smoking, I sat on the couch and felt numb to the world. Buddy, Jennifer, and Ashley were sharing the couch with me, and the last thing I remembered before falling asleep was Buddy saying: “On the count of three we all put our heads on the person to the right.” I laughed after they did it, and Buddy was like “You’re still awake?” “Yes.” “Aw…” He kissed me on the cheek and I fell asleep with his head still resting on my shoulder. So over the course of the two days, there was a little bit of drama during the mini-vacation, but altogether, it was an awesome trip that all of us will remember for the rest of our lives. Without that trip, I do not think that my college experience would have been the same. The day after, when we left the keys, we drove out to Bayside, to waste some time before going back to the dorms. I started thinking about leaving Florida, and how much I did not want to. I walked over to the bay and sat there, hoping to see a manatee, or a fish of some sort. I did not want to leave Bayside, it was beautiful, and when everyone said they were leaving, I just sat there. Buddy came up and grabbed me, leaning me over his shoulder, and walked away, carrying me. The day before I left college for good, Buddy woke me up during one of my daytime naps to take me on my first date ever to Applebee’s, which was our favorite restaurant. This would be the last quality time I would ever spend with my best friend. It was a good dinner, with him giving me dating tips and suggestions. Driving back to Bay Vista was a mission: Buddy kept getting lost and making U-turns, and he claimed it was because I was a distraction. When we finally got back, we made our rounds to people that were not going to be there the next day, saying goodbye. Eventually, I went outside for a cigarette… “Give me one of those.” Buddy said. “What?” I said, shocked, and handed him a cigarette. He lit it, and began to smoke. “All the stress of people leaving, I need to smoke too!” He said. “Ha-ha Okay.” “Get up for a second.” He said. I got up. “Come here.” He hugged me, for what seemed like a really long period of time. “You know something? You really are my best friend… and I’m gonna miss you like crazy, Germ.” That one moment out of all of the semester was probably one of the saddest ones I had to experience. The day I was supposed to check out of Bay Vista Housing, Buddy came upstairs and woke me up by hugging me. He came in a couple of times to wake me up, and the last time he came in, I was already awake and packing. He walked up to me, gave me a really long hug, told me he was going to miss me, and then he kissed me. I was shocked and speechless, and finally blurted out the one short and simple question I had. “What was that for?” “To say bye.” He simply said that, and walked away. I watched him walk towards the elevator, and suddenly it hit me; this was my last day of college, my last day of seeing my best friend, and my last day of seeing all of these people, maybe forever. Like the saying goes, you never know how much you will miss something or someone until it is gone. It was the end of the semester, and I could have cried my eyes out. I made such great friends and such great memories. I will resent my mom forever for disowning me, and causing me to leave the things I loved so much. Because of her not liking what I had chosen to do in college and her not wanting me to see and experience these things, she wanted out of my life and did not want to pay for college for me to party. Partying did not take away from my schoolwork, I still did well, and accomplished a lot, and even got paid to do other people’s work on top of it all. I was working two jobs, going to school and doing fine. But she was stubborn and tried to hide me from all of these experiences that even she went through, and she could not accept the fact that I am going to go through them regardless, with or without her interference. She refused to pay for anything after that, and my father could not afford me to stay at FIU any longer by himself, so I was forced to move back up to New York and live with him. So we had plenty of crazy nights that we did not remember. We had tons of parties, and tons of alcohol. We had tons of all-nighters, tons of arguments, tons of drama, and tons of fun. I guess that was the part of college life my mother did not want me to experience. That is actually a part of the reason I got disowned, and a reason I was sent back to New York. Throughout the short time I spent at college, I learned not to make spaghetti sauce with bleu cheese and ketchup, who to trust and who not to trust, how to manage a social life, two part time jobs, and school while succeeding all at the same time, not to judge people, how important getting work done is, how to be smart with finances, in food shopping and other shopping, how important a best friend is, to be prepared during a hurricane, how to save money in a bank, and how much I resent my mother. I will never attend another college like Florida International University, and I will never have the chance to live on campus and gain the friendships, bonds, and enjoyment that I did there. I will never have the chance to grow older with these people and establish even more of a bond, not only through school, but also through working and business. Now in result, I have backtracked and have to start to work my way back up again, so I can go back to Florida, and hopefully continue my friendships with those people. Now, as I write this, I am terribly missing Florida to an extent that I have never missed anything so bad before. My experiences shape the person I am today, and without them, I would never learn anything. Without what I have gone through in college, I would not have learned a lot of what I did. I guess my mother just does not understand that, and as I mentioned, I will never forgive her for doing this to me, and making me leave the friends that I could have had forever. Through all of life I learned one thing: friends are forever, and without them, life would not be life, and they will always be there for you; I just hope I can get back what I once had with these people, and I just hope goodbyes are not forever. |