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Rated: · Short Story · Satire · #1140174
Back to the future subtract everything that made back to the future good.
The book was great, sorry about the future
By Anthony Sudweeks

So many things were left unsaid, he couldn’t take it. He would’ve loved to have told his boss the day he quit exactly what he thought of him. It would have been great to tip the waiter, the one who very well might have saved his live, a little more. And what would life be like today if only he could change what he had said to Sara. Well, as unbelievable as this sounds all of that was just about to happen to Wayne Thompson.
Right before Stephen Hawking had died his friends and family members reported that he had been working tediously at finishing his last novel. He’d called it the biggest break through physics, or perhaps the world, will ever experience. But in order to keep his discovery a secret, he refused to show it to anyone- even family members. For weeks upon weeks after making the enormous discovery, he worked on writing a book that would explain it all in full detail. Those who knew him closely remembered how terrible he looked right before finishing the book, right before submitting it to the publisher.
So Stephen Hawking died on a Saturday afternoon. He’d submitted his book, to the publisher, gone home, and died. The publisher who was to receive the book was out at lunch when professor Hawking arrived, so after a couple of seconds, he decided that it would be safe to leave the book with the publisher’s secretary: Wayne Thompson. Professor Stephen Hawking, one of the greatest minds in the history of the world, was wrong.
Wayne had read Hawking’s book A brief history of time, and had thourghoughly enjoyed it. He liked how someone as smart as Hawking could explain things of such a complex nature to anyone. But this new book was even better. He started reading the first page and went mad with information. Darting for the door he nearly ran straight into the publisher. “Hello there Wayne, have a nice lunch?” said the publisher.
“I have to go sir, there has been a family emergency!” Wayne turned and ran, and that was the last time anyone ever saw him alive. The police arrived at his house later that night after the neighbours reported hearing several loud explosions. What they found seemed very strange. In the middle of the house they found a very strange looking machine and all sorts of items that looked like they’d come from the future.
And poor Wayne lay dead with something that looked like a manuscript stuffed down his throat. Next to his body they found this note:
I write this letter to the world,
First I would like to apologize in advance for setting off that nuclear bomb- I thought it was a microwave. Second I’m sorry about killing Abraham Lincoln- I thought that I was going to the theatre to stop the murder, but when I aimed at the real murderer he ducked and I hit poor president Lincoln right in the head. I have destroyed Mr. Hawking’s wonderful book and I am about to swallow it to make sure that no one will use this information again. And as for the device, I have taken out a very important fuse that is very difficult to find. If man kind is ever ready to travel into the future again they’ll at least have something to work with.

PS: Tell Mr. Hawking I am sorry for ruining his book, it was excellent.


© Copyright 2006 Kyle Lamberton (anthonysuds at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1140174-sorry-about-the-future