Storm

The wind blows me off my course yet again,
it almost doesn't even matter anymore.
It's not like I know where I'm going,
tripping over stones.. imaginary and real.
I never want to get back up, yet I do.
Skinned knees and bloody palms.
I tell myself it doesn't hurt
but my mind isn't that powerful.
My body recognizes pain
and my heart knows when it's broken.
It doesn't know how to lie
like I do.

Heavy drops fall hard upon me
leaving dark bruises on my skin.
But I love the rain.
It hides my tears
so that you can't tell that I'm sad
when I'm dancing in the rain.

Streaks of lightning
brighten up the sky.
Inside me, it's dark and still.
I'll weather this storm like I have all the others
not really trying, not quite giving up
as my thoughts are drowned out by the thunder outside
and in the midst of the all the craziness and violence
of this inner silent storm
I pause
and I write
and I try to dream of rainbows.