All Terrain Bicycle Ride Misfortune

Just air up the tires and roll down dirt roads.
Watch out for sandburs and fast jumping toads.

Clothespins and cards on the spokes so they click.
I oiled the chain so it wouldn't stick.

Here's a washboard, hold on the handlebars.
Let's get off this road before I see stars.

Lie in the grass; a poison ivy bed?
We'll get you home before it starts to spread.

Get some medicine to make you feel fine.
Ahh, relief- ole-pal-o-mine calamine.

Now you feel better, your tires need a patch.
Guess I'll have to walk, and try not to scratch.