Finding Family

There is a wee little bar not too far from the house that DH and I have been going to for a few weeks now. Since the babies are going to visit their mother on Friday nights, we actually have a night without children present for the first time in, oh, many MANY years.

It’s kind of nice actually. There are only about, um….a dozen seats at the bar, and three two person tables. There is a pool table. That is about it. The establishment overlooks the lake which is quite peaceful. We live in a lake community which is very busy during the ‘season’ and very NOT busy the rest of the year, which works very well for us.

There are a number of old military veterans who patronize the bar, including both of us. DH is Army, I am Navy. Last night I had the honor to play 4 games of pool with a 71 year old retired Army vet named Paul. He is a very good pool shooter, but was a bit on the tipsy side. I am NOT a very good pool player, although in my day, I could hold my own. I wasn’t that tipsy, so I actually looked like I was doing well next to him.

The funny part is that, well, I am 51, he is 71, and neither one of us can see all that well anymore. Since he was tipsy, he just simply took off his glasses, LOL. He still out played me. Ah well.

Thanksgiving is finally over. We only had one fight during the day. The junkie daughter yelled at the granddaughter that wasn’t hers, and it offended her older sister quite a bit. Offended me too for all of that. DH said that we weren’t having Thanksgiving anymore, that they could all go ‘piss up a rope’ and eat out next year. He doesn’t mean it though.

He is a bit of a big bear. Grizzly, large and ferocious. Think Ballou from Jungle Book, only he is not Blue. He can be loud, but is very gentle. He gets angry at stuff like that because it is so unnecessary.

I called my brother yesterday. I haven’t spoken to him since Mom died 22 years ago. We didn’t have the most normal childhood, really, it was pretty far from normal. None of us grew up resembling anything at all what normal is, but you all know how I feel about normal anyway. It was nice to talk with him.

Kind of funny. After years, and I do mean YEARS of having no contact with my family at all, my niece literally shows up on my doorstep. 18 years of virtually no contact, and we do not live anything resembling close to each other. Then, after assimilating into our family, she goes and finds her cousin, the only child of my other brother. The oldest boy is her biological father. The second child is me. I had two biological children. The third child is my younger brother, he had one son. The fourth child is divorced with no children. He lives somewhere in the Philadelphia area under an assumed name. Long story there and you DON’T want to hear it, trust me.

Anyway, niece/daughter-in-law goes and googles her cousins name, and lo and behold, he has a myspace page (as do we all). She contacts him. He is totally overjoyed to find family, having grown up literally with none but his Mom and Dad.

Now, a year or so ago, I had my family of husband and children, grandchildren. Presently, I have my niece/daughter-in-law whom I love dearly. My other nephew whom I have corresponded with but not yet seen, but who is overseas for two years right now. I have re-contacted his father and mother, both of whom are wonderful people. His Dad is the other almost normal child in my family, along with me. Well, maybe not normal, but the most socially acceptable anyway. I have reestablished contact with my niece’s mother who divorced her father when she was a year or so old. I loved my ex sister in law dearly and am glad she is now doubly related to me! As well as grateful that I found her. She will be coming up for Christmas and I cannot wait for her to get here!

So, my family has been enlarged by a factor of 8, including her three half sisters. (did you really follow all that?)

My four children have found their two cousins. And they now have aunts and an uncle to meet. The babies are excited to hear about all these people. The house will be even fuller at holidays.

Life is good.