Off my Chest

When I was 12, my dad was offered a summer research position at the University of Texas in Austin.  We were all excited to go and spend the summer exploring the big college city of Austin.  We were living in Lubbock at the time and Austin seemed like the another world to us.

My brother and I set out discovering almost every day and had some great adventures.  One of the coolest spots we found was the strip right off the college.  Cheap, hot food on carts, lots of people, parks nearby, and arcades on every block.
It was in the arcades that I ran into Joe.  He was a really nice guy and befriended us with money.  To a 12 yr old kid that had mowed many lawns, this was unreal.  I was a little suspicious but I told myself I would be careful. 

After a month of showering us with money, not enough that we had much left at the end of the day, Joe convinced us to go have lunch with him at his place, not far away.

And that is when he took advantage of me.  He fed us lunch and afterwards, asked me to lie down and he would give me a massage.  It quickly became much more than a massage and thankfully, I never got a hard on.  Joe could clearly tell that neither of us kids were having any fun and he stopped after 10 minutes of licking and sucking my poor little penis.
 
It freaked my poor developing brain out because it certainly wasn't the least bit sexual to me.  I was scared and afraid.  My brother never was involved and I thank God for that.  His actions were nice until we made it to his place.  In public, he was just a nice guy.

We never went back to his place and did run into Joe several times in arcades later that summer but we avoided him and took off if he started towards us.  I wish I had told someone about it but I never did until college.

Thank God, I went to a symposium at Colorado College on sexual abuse and my brain realized that I wasn't alone.  They darkened the room we were listening to the moderator and she asked us to tell of our experiences.  An hour later, over half of the 30 odd people had spoken up and I had the courage under darkness to say that I had also had a bad "sexual" experience as a kid.  I felt like a free man after that and saying this here makes me feel much better.  I've not been afraid to tell people this and each time I do, I feel a little bit better!

In closing, I still go to arcades and have fun but I keep my eyes out and if I see suspicious activity, I don't keep quiet anymore! 
Thanks for letting me share!  The word is powerful.