Letter

To the one I love,

So much time has gone past and so many things left unsaid. Feelings felt but not reveiled. Instead of growing together we grew apart. This letter has been a long time coming and so many times I have almost come and said right out to you but then fear would grip me for I was afriad of what we actually did have left no matter how small of a piece of what once was... that I would even lose that. I'm so scared of saying something that could possibly be taken the wrong way. So once again I have rebuilt those walls that you once knocked down three years ago. I understand that you can never love me like you once did. I've come to accept that fact and thats the real reason why I stay away so much, it's just the only way I know how to deal I actually thought if I stayed away long enough that I would be able to come back and eventually talk to you and not have those feelings resurface..boy once again was a completely and totally wrong and stupid for thinking that. I sit here and remember those times we once shared. The hours of talking, the laughter.. every thought and feeling shared. You made me feel alive and free and for once in my life made me feel really loved and treasured. I remember a time when I felt no fear in telling you anything and I compare that to how I feel now. I feel like I'm keeping things from you..like I'm hiding behind that same mask that you once so carefully took the time to look under and see the real me. I sit here and wonder why am I trying to protect my heart from you of all people. And I sit here and pray that if you do happen to ever read this that you dont think that I'm trying to blame you for it is myself that I blame. I'm just wanting you to know what is going on inside me because I really do want to share with you once again.I'm just so afriad to do so and not because I dont trust you but because I'm afriad that once again I may become more of a burden to you. Then I think this letter could even be the most sorry thing I've ever done because maybe you have no feelings left for me at all and then this letter would have little point. I told you that I once had a reason for being here and that once I thought that reason didnt exist anymore then there was no reason to stay. I want you to know Your love was my reason and without I dont care to be around then. I love you, but is me loving you enough?

Once Your
meja