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Rated: E · Editorial · Comedy · #1240405
This was written for the "I have a theory" contest. It is my theory of why the Bluetooth.
The wearing of Bluetooth phones is something that is sweeping the world right now, but why?  Is it because people and communication technology are coming closer and closer to becoming one?  Or is it just for the fact that people are becoming lazier by the minute.  Or possibly people simply enjoy looking stupid.  But after much contemplation on the subject I have come to the true meaning behind this unusual and quite frankly horrible looking phenomenon. 

Unlike most things in life, according to Tom Hanks anyways, this question could not be answered with a quote from the God Father.  Although it does stretch back to the human’s nature to absorb things they see on the big screen.  This show was one of the better things people could have been watching in years past.  A show about the future.  A show with a lot of hot chicks.  A show that just could not be deigned.  Of course I am referring to Star Trek. 

Now I could get into the whole Captain Picard vs. Captain Kirk thing here, but for this particular theory it doesn’t really matter.  One got all the ladies and the other was just a better actor.  So, with a better actor in play, people who watch can more personally relate to the character on screen.  For this discussion, we will not say he is the “better” Captain only the more “relatable” Captain.

Another key element to this theory is one of the most compelling characters to ever cross the regular or silver screen.  That, of course, is the Borg.  The realization of man and machine.

Ok, now after all that setup here comes the theory.  People today would not be defiling themselves with the Bluetooth technology had Captain Picard not been abducted and made into a Borg himself.

If it had just been the Borg terrorizing the galactic neighborhood then the mob that is today’s society would most likely not have embraced the ear growth that is a Bluetooth.  But because the more “relatable” Captain himself was changed into a “Bluetooth” wearing monster the fickle masses embedded in their weak memory banks a desire to be more Picardesque.  After a decade or so of wishful yearning for something they could not quite put their fingers on or in as the case may be, the present’s technology saved the day and brought about a chance to become just a little more like the Borg we now admired.   

Without the Shakespearean acting of Captain Picard, the inventive imagination of Gene Rodenberry and the impressionable minds of our world’s Trekies and beyond, the people of today’s tomorrowland would not have reached out for and clung to the blasphemy of the Bluetooth.  There in lies the true behind the Bluetooth phone.
© Copyright 2007 kuttuks (kuttuks05 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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