Hope and Desire

I am a goldfish. I don’t have a name; my mom never called me with one. As I opened my eyes in this world, I saw water all around me.

On beaches, I used to watch people lying on sand, basking in sunlight, children making sand houses, teenagers playing volleyball. I don't know when an urge of being with the world crept in me. I used to think,” why can’t I be like them. It is so creepy to live in water all day long.”

I remember when I was a kid my mamma told me that fishes can't live without water. “But mamma I want to see this world. The world where I've a name, friends, and somebody who cares for me", was my reply.

From my childhood, I believed that every goldfish has a day; so when I was caught and taken away by a fisherman, I felt God's grace falling on me. I don’t remember for how many times I changed my living place but what I do remember, is people exchanging some colored printed papers every time I moved to a new living place.
I was not sure what all was happening in my life but I was enjoying every bit of it.  The only thing I was missing in my Life was my loving Mamma.

In my journey from sea to this small shop, I made many new friends. Many fishes got attracted towards my shiny golden skin and proposed me. But, here I was to enjoy the world and not to get into a relationship, so I turned down all the proposals until that guy came into my Life. Don’t be amazed he was a man & not a fish-My first & last crush. In one word, I can define his personality as "Dynamic".

What a beautiful winter afternoon that was. I was peacefully sleeping in my aquarium when a car wheels screeched near the shop. With my half open eyes, I looked at him and cursed him for breaking my sleep. I knew he was there to purchase fishes, to make them a decorative item in his house.

While looking from the corner of my eyes, I didn't find him an interesting guy but I think he was too interested in me. As soon as, he saw me, he decided to buy me. With a big sigh, I increased my crush count to 12.

The shop owner put me in a small round glass aquarium and handed me to him. Again, I saw those colored printed paper exchanging hands.

He put my small world safely in his car and there I went on my first date.
I was fully into my dream world when the car wheels screeched again and I found both of us at the entrance of a big house. The excitement of living in a big house and making new friends reached to such a high level in me that I was ready to jump out of my aquarium.

He handed me to his wife and sung a tune in his melodious voice "Happy B'day to you". "So, God has been kind on me”, I thought. “He doesn't want me to just remain a decorative item in a big house rather he wants me to be a token of love". What a relief I felt.

He kissed her cheeks. On seeing them kissing, my journey to dream world started again. I dreamt of him presenting me a fish as B’day gift & then kissing on my cheeks. I enjoyed every bit of my daydreaming. I was falling for that guy but I was not a fool. I knew I was a fish.

At the very moment, I decided that I'll provide him affection and will try to become his best buddy. The very day, I got a name too. He named me "Nancy" after the name of his first crush. I really loved this name as it was sooooo nonu*.
As the days passed, our relationship grew stronger.

The first thing, he used to do on returning from office was to come to my place and watch me swim. He simply loved it. Once, I overheard him saying that he forgot the whole day's harshness and negativity as he watched me swimming.

Many times, at night he used to come to me, to share him. Though, I don't like anybody disturbing me in my sleep but for him, I was always there. I listened to all his stuff like his best buddy although none of it made sense to me. After telling his stuff, he used to thank me and put his finger in the water so that I can kiss it and bid good night.

Now, the time has come for me.  As goldfishes don’t have long life so I am nearing my end. I don’t fear my death because I’ve got everything that I once desired - a name, friends and a person who cares for me but I am afraid. I am afraid about him forgetting me. The question that often arises in my mind is "Will he miss me?”

*Nonu = Cute