The Empty Spaces ...

"My wife has a slight impediment in her speech.Every now and then she stops to breathe." -- Jimmy Durante

It's amazing how so many couples/people associate conversation with caring/love. They think that the moment one stops having regular conversations with a partner/friend means the relationship/friendship is dead. I've also read in magazines that so many couples call it quits because they've stopped 'communicating'. I personally think that's a load of crap! You leave somebody because you don't get along and not because you've both stopped talking to each other!If any of these people who left a relationship because there was a breakdown in communication were to dig deeper, I'm pretty sure they'll find that there was NONE to start out with in the first place! If a relationship is doomed ... conversation is definitely not going to save it!

Talking is a form of communication but communication does not necessarily mean talking. Many don't realize this but you sometimes don't need to talk to communicate! Coz SILENCE, is also another form of communication. It can mean so many things like 'I DON'T UNDERSTAND A WORD YOU'RE SAYING ...' , 'F--K OFF', 'I'M THINKING' or 'I'M DUMB, SEE ... I DON'T HAVE A TONGUE!'. Seriously though, it's like the spaces between notes in your favourite song. It makes the song a lot more appealing, because of those spaces you appreciate the choice of notes more. Ha ha ... I believe that's why God made breathing compulsory! One has to breathe between sentences, so that's why there's a lot to be said for the appreciation of SILENCE! It is the space between conversations. Believe it ... SILENCE IS GOLDEN!

When you've been in a relationship for as long as I have, most personal topics of conversation have been covered by the end of the 1st year (give or take a year) and it doesn't mean that now when there's nothing much to say, a union is doomed!There will always be current topics for conversation but in general, I really believe that two people who've been together for ages should learn to appreciate some silence between themselves ... even welcome it to some extent coz it really does go a long way. Oh, don't get me wrong, there's a big difference between being silent and being rude (for lack of a better word). For instance, keeping absolutely quiet and ignoring your partner is rude but being silent when you have nothing of consequence to say is WISE! So remember, one day when you're older and you find that good conversation is hard to come by, you can sit QUIETLY with your loved ones and still appreciate their company all because you've learnt the true value of silence!

I think it's remarkable when a whole family can sit in a living room and actually keep quiet ... so quiet that you can almost hear your own thoughts. Ha ha ... maybe I'm just being selfish by saying this coz no two people are the same and to expect another person to feel this way isn't exactly fair. I can't help myself because I happen to appreciate my solitude and the silence that comes with it ... immensely. Even when I was growing up, you would find me alone in my room reading, listening to music and the like. With the exception of my brother, everyone else (my parents and sister) loves to read. Most afternoons would find all of us lazing about in our very own designated 'zones' with our favourite reading materials and thus, when we all did get together for conversation, it was most assuredly interesting and reasonably important ... well, most of the time anyway :o)

I believe people should not try to have conversations just for the sake of having them ... there's got to be some subject matter involved! People can't just talk for no reason at all ... that to me is a sign of insecurity! They're afraid of what people might make of their silence. From personal experience, I've never thought of a person who keeps quiet most of the time as stupid. In fact, there have been many a time when I would have liked to shut somebody up for talking too much! I've never done it yet ... ha ha, I doubt I ever will but the thought has occured to me more than once. Hmm ... after all that's been said I've come to accept that life is perfect but people never are! So you plod on in the hopes of making your own life a little better each day ... in my case it's the pursuit of those little spaces between words. Ha ha ... I also hope I can get as many of my friends to read this little post so that they may better understand me and not be offended when I drift off to my own little world even whilst in the midst of their company.

Well I guess that's all I have to say this time around and now I'm left with the tough job of figuring out a suitable title for this little entry ... ha ha. Before I go, I would just like to say this to all of you who take the trouble to read this;

Send me a message or a comment ... do tell me what you think, DON'T JUST KEEP SILENT ABOUT THE WHOLE DAMN THING!!! :o)

Gerard Singh