The Litter Box

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“Why not, Jason? You’re always telling me I need to read a book about it.” Alice pouted after saying this since her boyfriend was being stubborn. Even after only dating a few months, she knew how to wear him down to get her own way.

Jason looked at the young woman. He had been attracted to the pretty St. Olaf, Minnesota transplant the first time he saw her at work. Her innocence shone out of baby-blue eyes, and he knew he’d met the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. The only problem he found with her so far was her lack of sexual experience. “Alice,” he finally slowly said, “are you sure?”

A smile replaced her pout. “Oh, yes. Can we go to one now?” Alice had been curious for quite some time about what was for sale in so-called adult stores. She now saw her chance to visit one with the man she adored. Almost bouncing in excitement, she got into his car, ready to be educated.

After driving out for a few miles on the freeway, Jason took the St. Mark Exit and went about a mile down Santa Rosa Avenue. When he turned into the parking lot of a store in a strip mall, Alice looked up at the sign above the store, disappointment filling her. It read in big red letters.

THE LITTER BOX

Only after they got out of the car and got up close to the building did she see a smaller sign below. The words on it flashed off and on to tell customers, For You and Your Pussy.

She turned to Jason in disappointment. “A pet store? You brought me to a pet store?”

Trying not to grin, Jason nodded and led Alice into the store. The room they entered was dimly lit, but Alice saw a handful of customers wandering around the shelves and counters. A clerk sat behind a counter on which was a cash register. He looked up from the magazine he was reading to acknowledge their entrance. “Look around,” he said, eyeing Alice in a way that made her a bit uncomfortable. He winked at Jason but after that silently followed their progress around the room.

To start Alice’s education, Jason walked down a corridor and stopped in front of a box filled with orgasmic power balls. The strings containing three balls came in red, black and purple. Alice picked up the purple one to watch it dangle freely. “Oh, Jason, my cat Joey would love this to play with.” Ignoring the chuckle coming from the clerk, she handed the balls to Jason and moved on.

Next, she came across a collection of boxes containing inflatable dolls. Two labeled “Inflatable Wife” and “Inflatable Husband” caught her attention. “These are perfect for Jenny. She’s always wanting more dolls to play with.” The odd sound from Jason confused her since he had met her 10-year-old niece and knew of her fascination with dolls. Alice picked out one of each doll and added them to the purple balls Jason was holding.

“Does this store carry books?” she asked, with a smile at the clerk. “I’m told I need to read a book.” Following his pointing finger, she saw shelves on the other side of the room filled with both paperback and hard cover books. “Thank you,” Alice said, having been brought up to always be polite.

When she walked away to check out the titles, Jason stayed behind and, grinning widely, asked the clerk. “You have any recommendations for her?”

“Oh no, I’m too curious to see which one she picks out.” The clerk hadn’t been this amused with a customer since the older women of the local Red Hat Society dropped by one afternoon. “Is she really going to give the balls to her cat?” When Jason nodded, the clerk said, with a straight face, “I hope she hasn’t had him neutered yet.”

It took almost half an hour for Alice to pick out a couple books and return to the cash register. “Here’s one of that movie we saw the other week, “Lost in Translation.” Alice failed to notice the title read lust and not lost. She showed the cover of the second book to her boy friend. “Jason, this probably is the book you said I should read.

“The Art of Tantric Sex,” he read out loud. “Yes, this is the exact book I was thinking of. Are you ready to leave yet?” When Alice absently nodded, too engrossed in reading the book cover of this second book, Jason pulled out a credit card and handed it to the waiting clerk.

“Sorry, Mister,” said the clerk, handing the credit card back and pointing over his shoulder to the wall behind him. “Read the sign!”

On a large piece of cardboard, in big block letters, were the words,

“In God We Trust! Everyone Else Pays Cash!”

After glancing at the sign, Jason took out a handful of bills to pay for the balls, dolls, and books. With the items packaged, he and Alice finally left the adult entertainment store. He knew Alice still needed to learn a lot more about sex, but she had made a good start today.

“Jason,” Alice asked after getting into the car, “can you take me home now?” Without answering, Jason started the car and drove out of the parking lot. Alice continued, taking one of the books from the package and reading it, “The comments on the back of this book about tantric sex said it was healthy for the body. Maybe we can drop our memberships at the gym and try what’s in the book instead. What do you think?”

“I think, Alice, we are going to have an interesting time when we get to your place. A VERY interesting time!” With that, Jason smiled in anticipation of what was to come. Alice gently patted his right leg and left her hand there for the rest of the drive. She was happy to have such an understanding boy friend, willing to indulge her wishes and also to help her remain in good health. What else could a woman want in a man? she thought, I must try to find a way to thank him!

Jason ended the afternoon feeling extremely healthy, but sadly, Joey never got to play with his balls.