Promiscuous

No one knows the truth. I am the only one that can explain things accurately. Speculations fly around the small town like wildfire, but that’s all it is, mere speculation. Everyone thinks they know so much about me, about us. How much do they really know? Stories spin into webs of gossip through the church and local hot spots. Sad that you think you know a person, but in reality, they are so different from your ideals of them. I thought I knew how my life would turn out. Even with echoes of my father ringing in my ear telling me I would never amount to anything; he didn’t know me either. I sure surprised him when I announced I would marry my high school sweetheart, you know the one, football player, president of the student body, dreamy eyes, the whole package. He wanted to marry me, small town nothing. I never was much to look at, but he saw something other people didn’t. Enough about that, let’s get into the real story. The truth that has been dying to come out.
“So, John wants to marry you? You pregnant?” My father. Always predictable.
“No, daddy.” It exhausts me to have a conversation with him. He thinks he knows so much.
“Well, it’s gotta be something. He can’t love you. Look at ya.” As I said, predictable.
“Actually, he does love me. I don’t know why you think I can’t be loved by someone. Mom wouldn’t have been so mean to me.” Oh boy, did I say the wrong thing there. When am I going to learn to keep my mouth shut?
“Your mother, God rest her soul, didn’t get the opportunity to see you in action. I’ve seen you dress in your finest slut-wear to go out with him and others like him. Don’t you see? They only want you for one thing, Kelly Marie. One thing only. I know you have sex with all of them. I know you better than you know yourself.”
Okay, stop. If there is one thing I have to admit throughout my life, it is this; I have a weakness. Everyone does, mine just is a little more risky than others. Sex is exciting. I can’t help but love it. Maybe a little too much at times, but God knows, my father has never showed me love, so I have to find it somewhere, right? The guys always tell me how much they love me, even if it’s only in the back seat of their parent’s car for thirty minutes. John is different, though, he really does love me. He never believed all of the town gossip about me and I want to keep it that way. I know once I marry him, I will have enough good sex to last a lifetime and I won’t need to find love anywhere else. He will keep me satisfied. Okay, back to the story.
“Daddy, you don’t know me. I’m not like that. You are just like everyone else in this sorry little excuse for a town. I am marrying John and he has joined the army. We are flying out to Florida in two weeks and I am going with him, not that you care.” With that, I went into my lonely little room in the back of the house and packed up my things. My father didn’t try to stop me and I’m still glad he didn’t. He died a few years back and I have no regrets. Well, maybe just one; I wish I could have known my mother. She died giving birth to me and my father blamed me for it the rest of his miserable life. I guess he loved her or maybe he hated her for leaving him behind to deal with me. Who knows, that’s a story he would have to tell.
So, I married John and we immediately moved to Florida. There I was in a strange place all alone. John was in boot camp for the first two weeks of our marriage and we lived on base. With no one to talk to or any kind of human interaction, I decided to get a job. I began working for A T & T as a phone operator. Answering calls all day about people’s bills and phone service. To say the least it was the most boring job, but I hung in there for the next five years of my boring, lifeless marriage to John. We had a child, Victoria, and I had several affairs with the men I worked late nights with. It’s amazing what a little makeup and short skirts can do for a person. John left me no choice, you see. He spent late nights with his “buddies” drinking and partying all hours of the evenings and I decided to switch to the night shift before Victoria was born. I met one gentleman, in particular that had a hungry appetite for me. On breaks, we would sneak into the janitorial closet and have hot, passionate sex. He wasn’t much to look at himself, but other parts of him were very enjoyable, if you know what I mean. John never knew about the men at A T & T and I would never tell him. I am sure he had other women, I could never prove it, but a woman knows these things. Don’t get me wrong, John and I had our moments of passion, but the longer we were married the farther and fewer between they became. I couldn’t help myself, I had to be fulfilled and John couldn’t do it for me anymore. I guess you could say it was his fault, but again, I would never tell him that.
“We need to get ready to move.” John told me this at the dinner table two weeks after Victoria was born.
“Are you kidding me? I have too many friends to leave now.”
“We don’t have a choice, Kelly. I have been transferred to back to Texas.”
“Why, Texas? Where at in Texas? I can’t believe you are doing this to me. I never wanted to set foot back in Texas again and you knew that. Tell them no.”
“Kelly, I can’t tell them no. They are the ones who tell me what to do. You are just going to have to deal with it and move on. I only have one year left I have to serve and then we can go wherever we want to go. You can transfer your job to Texas, temporarily.”
There we were, or there I was, stuck again having to do whatever a man told me to do. My father always made me do things I didn’t want to, not in a sexual way of course, but other things, like cook for him and his friends, one of which was my first. I think I was about 13 when that happened. He was the best looking out of the bunch and I sort of came on to him, I suppose. Anyway, enough about that, so, we picked up and moved to Texas, John and I that is, Houston to be exact. Only I couldn’t transfer, I had to start over again, this time with ADC EarthCom. Turns out, ADC would change my life in ways I could never imagine.

I began working as a telemarketer for ADC and quickly slept my up to account executive. I say slept, because we all know that in a man’s world you have to make sacrifices in order to move up the ladder. I just made sure on my way up the ladder I wore a short skirt and no panties. This is how I met Rex. I hired him as my assistant, not because he knew his stuff, but because I knew by looking at his package through his pants, that we would get along great on our “late night” calls. I made a rule in my part of the office that we would cold call people two nights a week, trying to make the sale. I was at the top of my game making sales calls this way and I knew Rex could help out, he was so eager to please.
The first of many late night calls was the most eventful of the pre-Rex calls. My other assistant had called in sick and the other departments had left for an early meeting in the city. Rex and I made small talk and then the rest is history.
“So, Rex, how long have you and your wife been married?” I only found out of his marriage after I hired him, but I knew I could turn his head quick, no worries there.
“Joan and I have been married to two years. She’s great.” Rex didn’t seem very enthusiastic about that and I doubted he was telling the entire truth. Perfect opportunity for me, however.
“I have been married to 6 long years, myself. Not the happiest, but married nonetheless. John and I, well, lets just say, he doesn’t satisfy me in ways a women needs to be satisfied.” I smiled coyly at Rex and waited for his response.
“Really. Well, I try with Joan, but it’s almost like she doesn’t want me anymore. I don’t know what is wrong.” Rex knew what I was thinking and he was on the same track as I was.
“What kind of things do you do for her?” I leaned in a little, not too much. Don’t want to scare him away just yet.
“You know, the usual, buying flowers, making dinner with candles, the whole nine yards. She doesn’t appreciate it, though. Sometimes, I think…..”
“What? Go ahead, I’m listening.”
“Sometimes, I can’t help but think she’s having an affair.”
Oh boy, here we go. I’ve heard this one before and I know how to play into it, too. I just have to remember to take it slow and easy, as hard as it may be.
“Well, I know my husband has affairs. Can’t prove it, but a woman knows these things. He doesn’t pay any attention to me. No candles, no dinners, and certainly no flowers from him. Your wife is very lucky and doesn’t even know it.”
“Your husband should appreciate a woman with your gumption. I know I would appreciate it, if I were him. You're attractive, too.” Rex slowly lowered is eyes to my best assets, fake, but the best anyway. I am very proud of them, at 4g’s a pop, everyone better look at them.
“You think so? You’re not so bad yourself.” My eyes went to his lips as I leaned in just enough so I could smell his Polo cologne and feel his breath on my face.
“Yes, I do, think so, I mean.” He leaned in, at this point, just a little more, our lips almost touching, but not quite.
“We should be satisfied, you know. We deserve that much, don’t you think?” I lowered my voice and inched a little closer and licked my lips.
Then it happened. Rex answered my question and fast. Our lips met and from then we began to rip each other’s clothes off and I think I busted a couple of buttons on his shirt. He lifted my skirt and found that I was bare from panties. My torn top fell to the floor and our kisses of passion were almost more that I could handle. I had been with many men, but this time was more, brutal. Banging against the desk, hard and fast, lip biting, hair pulling and more groping and grabbing than I have ever done in my life. When it was over, which, by the way, lasted a little over an hour, that’s right, I said and hour, I was tired and sore. I went to the restroom and saw the bruises left behind on my legs and my butt. The best sex I had ever had.
That night, I went home and told John it was over. I told him I was taking Victoria and we were leaving. I had found another man and he was boring and lifeless as a husband. The next day, Rex and I found an apartment in the city and he also told his wife he was leaving her. They had no children, so there was nothing to tie him to her. She didn’t seem to care much, so Rex told me later.
I know what you’re thinking, moving a little fast aren’t ya? Well looking back now, I suppose I did, but talk about passion. Like I said the best of my life. Rex’s too, so he told me. Said his wife would never have done it but missionary style behind the closed doors of the bedroom. See, Joan was Rex’s high school sweetheart, like John was to me. Rex had never had sex with anyone but her, so he said. I on the other hand, had plenty to compare him to, but I would never tell him that.
About a month later, on the same day, actually, I found out I was pregnant and was served with divorce papers. How ironic is that? But here’s the kicker, not sure whose it is. I had sex with John two nights before the steamy scene at the office, so I’m thinking tell John it’s his. I mean I was married to the son-of-a-bitch for 6 years of my wretched life; he might as well give me something in return for that complete waste of time, right? Child support for two is better than one, I always say. So that’s what I did, told John about the baby. Of course, he denied it could be his, with the affair and all, but how could he prove an affair? That, my friends, would be my word against his and usually the women win court battles with ex-husbands, especially pregnant ones.
We went to court, after the babies were born, yes, I said babies. Turns out I had twins, boys no less. Anyway, we went to court after they were born because John attorney said it would be better to do a DNA test after the birth. Before or after wouldn’t have mattered, also turns out the babies were not his. They were Rex’s, so here we are in court and I don’t get a dime, in fact I have to share custody of Victoria with John. Blows my idea of moving to California, my life long dream. So, Rex and I decide to get married quick and easy at the courthouse with the boys in tow. Did I also mention the passion of the beginning had quickly turned in to passionate fights? I know now, why Joan wouldn’t give it up to him. Say one thing wrong and its world war three. Instead of clothes flying around the room it’s whatever he can find to throw at me. Instead of bruises of passionate sex on my legs, its bruises of anger on my face that I have to hide with makeup, if I’m lucky.
So it comes down to today, four years, two kids, a new house and new cars, purchased mostly by me, I might add. After all I’m the account executive and he is a programmer now. I still bring in most of the money. Maybe that’s where the anger sets in, who knows. ADC has decided to transfer him to Iraq to work on communication programming for the government. Top secret. He sends me money, big money all of a sudden and I pay off a lot of the debt. I’ve picked him up from the airport and we are on our way back home.
“What have you been doing over there, anyway?” I ask, knowing full well, it’s probably illegal. I know ADC doesn’t pay him that well.
“Private. I can’t talk about it. Don’t worry about it anyway. I finally bring home more than you and you can shut-up about it.”
“I just can’t figure out why ADC would pay you in large lump sums, Rex. I know how they work. I’ve been there long enough to know…” Whack, right across the cheek. When will I learn to keep my mouth shut, anyway?
“I said don’t worry about it.” And that was that.

One Monday in July, I wasn’t feeling well and decided to stay home. Rex went on in to work and took the kids to daycare. Newsflash, though, dear Rex. I really feel fine. I just need some time to do a little digging. So, I did. After hours of looking through papers and checkbooks, two of which I found hidden in a locked desk drawer. Checkbooks, turns out, from accounts over seas. You know the ones, Swiss so no one can track them. Never have figured that one out. Anyway, I also found e-mails from foreign men. Names I couldn’t pronounce, but I knew they were from Iraq. I sat there in the office of my husband surrounded by papers and check registers with millions written on the lines, wondering what to do. It didn’t take long to decide to do what every other loving wife would do, I called the FBI. Well, not at first, at first I spoke to the local police department and then the FBI, after about two hours of the locals not knowing who I should talk to.
The firestorm raged from that day on. I had to pretend not to know a thing, as the FBI started snooping around at all the banks in the US where Rex had accounts.
“Rex, I think we need to talk.”
“What about?” Rex never looked up from the computer in the study.
“Us. I’ve had all I can take. I’m taking the boys and Victoria and going to find an apartment in the city.”
“No you’re not.” Still not looking up from the computer he spoke in an eerily calm tone. I was expecting more of a yelling and hitting match.
“Yes, Rex, I am. A man came to the door this morning while you were gone. Said he was from the FBI and wanted to talk to me about you.”
“What did you tell him? What was he asking about?” Boy did that get his attention. His eyes were glazed over and his skin had become pale and pasty.
“I told him the truth. He was asking where we got the money to pay off our house so quick. I told him you had been in Iraq and would send it home for me to take care of things.”
“You did what? I can’t believe you Kelly. Are you stupid?”
“Rex, if I lied, then what? Anyway, what’s the big deal?” As I turned to grab something to drink in the kitchen, trying to play it cool, Rex decided to grab me by the hair and throw me to the ground. As he flipped me over on my back, my head hit the hardwood floor of the house we had made a home.
"It's a very big deal, Kelly. You don’t understand what a big deal it is."
"If you don't have anything to hide, why couldn't I just tell the truth?" I screamed at him, furious and fed up with the abuse he had been dealing to me over the years.
He struck me across my cheek with an open fist. "You have no idea, Kelly. I've been selling information to the Alquida network. I found out that they pay dearly for certain information."
He rose from me and left me lying on the floor. He turned and walked toward his desk, as if nothing had just happened.
"What kind of information? Have you been a spy for them? What have done?" I knew he had been doing something illegal, but I never dreamed it would be this serious.
"I've said too much to you already and by now they know too much." He reached into a drawer of his desk that usually stayed locked. I looked out the window to see our children playing on the swing set Rex had built for them out back. I had a bad feeling about the mood in the room. I saw him stick something in the back of his pants as we walked out of the room. I heard him pick up the phone and he pushed the buttons to dial someone, but I didn't know who.
Okay, stop. Here is where it gets a little hairy. While he was in the other room, on the phone, I looked at the computer screen and saw that he had been typing an e-mail to his parents. Strange e-mail, listing all of his accounts and how to get to them and how he had changed his parents to be the beneficiary for his life insurance and retirement funds. It never occurred to me what lied ahead for me, I just assumed he wanted a divorce too and was getting everything lined out. I've been wrong about things before, but this time blindsided me.
Rex came back into the study and found me looking at the computer. The expression on his face was different than I have ever seen him before. His eyes looked more glazed over as he glanced at the children and then at the clock.
"Rex, are you okay?"
He didn't say a word, just reached in the back of his pants and pulled out his pistol. Before I could say a word, it was too late. There I lay, on the hardwood floor of the house we had only built two years prior, crimson flowing from my chest. I could still hear different things going on around me, but it was fading quickly. I heard Rex leave the room and dial the phone again.
"I have three children here that need help quick." With that he hung up the phone, left the room again. The blood was beginning to bubble in my throat now and the only view I had was that of the balcony directly above me. I could tell he had moved to the second level of our house, but I didn't know what he was doing. Then I see the chain dangle from the rafter. Rex had climbed up on the rail of the balcony. He wrapped the chain around his neck and jumped. I could feel the blood flowing out of my mouth and slowly dripping on the hardwood floor and the sound of my children playing outside was the last sound I would hear.
So, there it is. The truth about what really happened in my quaint little family. I know it's tragic, but if there is one thing that I have learned about it, it is this; just when you think you know someone, they go and kill you.