This is a very powerful poem about my life |
You are what you make your past At 18 I have struggled more than most ever will It is these struggles that keep you strong They give you your most formidable weapons I am invincible *** On the nicest spring day It was storming inside I sat in front of you, sharing my most painful memories I sat there bawling, begging you to believe me But you sat there unaffected by my story Ignoring my pain, living in a perfect world Crafted by a master manipulator Leaving me the victim, again *** I sat next to you Listening intently as you described my perfect future Free of pain, and all other emotion You trained me for that role I had to be the perfect wife/mother/daughter Docile, Perfect, and Submissive Self giving to the point of my extinction A role I could never fill It wasn’t easy ignoring my gut and All the unexpressed emotions I kept inside, Caused me to become emotionally bankrupt You were pleased, I was numb *** I grew up in your footsteps An easy target for you You took a piece of me I didn’t know I had But still I was young , naïve, and desperately Longed for attention, even the negative Our relationship was like acid Eroding at my insides for years I was young and wanted you to be right *** After many talks, arguments, and forced happiness when I felt fear I realized you were a mess Unable to hang on to this self-destructing grenade I let go, setting my self free I couldn’t help you You didn’t want to help your self Unable to recognize a problem in your behavior You shattered my hope, but I had done all I could I couldn’t live for you *** I stand before you a charred phoenix New wings spread, for the long journey ahead Strong winds make the course difficult But I soar to a future untainted by my past |