I took a break from seriousness for this. Don't think me tasteless, it's a bit of fun. |
When we think of fairy tales, We think; Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and even Aladdin, All happy endings, right? Everyone falls in love, Every princess finds her prince, The villian is gone and the sadness is over, And they've been living happily ever since. But what if I told you that wasn't quite right, And the truth had been lost over time? Because I know what's real, and I'm willing to share, If you're ready for this sick little ride. Every little girl wants to find her Prince Charming, Cinderella found hers through a slipper of glass, At least, that's how you think that she found love, But really, she was Charming's royal piece of ass. You were told that the apple was poisoned, But that's not all true, you see. Snow White's mother liked to party hard, And had laced it with LSD. And what can we say of our dear Sleeping Beauty? She slumbered from a needle's prick. She slumbered alright, but it was not from a needle, Rather, the night before, she'd had too much to drink. Aladdin found Jasmin as a poor homeless teen, And yes, they did fall in love, However, the night that they first met, They had a threesome with Genie; no glove! Little Red Riding Hood, Visitng Grandma, how sweet. The truth is, she quite enjoyed the wolf, And their affair was a secret she promised to keep. Humpty Dumpty, the idiot, sat up so high, And yes, it's a fact, he did fall. The king's men didn't bother putting him back together, They stood there and laughed and threw his pieces back at the wall. Now, the Pied Piper, he was odd, It's another story that's half true, He did use his pipe, but not on the mice, But to lure children into his room. There's many more stories whose endings are false, And I'd be glad to tell you more, But for now, I'm finished, so goodbye until then, And look forward to what's in store. |