THE UPPER CRUST’S CRUSTY AFFAIR

‘THE UPPER CRUST’S CRUSTY AFFAIR’


In the latter part of the last century lived a man, a great politician who had devoted his life to the revival of politics, he in the real sense implemented the adage, of killing two birds with a single arrow. He lived a powerful life, died a powerful death and after so many years he has still not lost his touch, his remnants still evokes power his words, his photographs and you know what else, but whoever he was and whatever he did, it has nothing, what so ever to do with this story here, at least not in a literal sense, but figuratively speaking it may have, in fact it may also have a lot to do with each and every habitant of this country located in the east of Asia.

It’s a very fashionable country, talking of which it also had it’s very own fashion-week these days, which contained everything and anything which is not the culture of this country, and is in completely contrast with the religion the majority of the populace, observe. In the amid of all this lived a lady-who belonged to the fashion scene, an eminent proficient in every branch of fashion and style, who not long before our story opens had made an experience of a spiritual affinity more attractive than any make-up experience, she had left her make-up brushes (read paint brushes) in the care of an assistant, coated her uneven countenance with distemper and managed to entrap a perfect gull into marriage.
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In this day and age when guise is more important then the true character and not following the latest fashion is more appalling than not being able to spell your own name; it is not unusual for the love of social stratum to rival congenial love.

We know not which degree of devotedness, Alina possessed for the outward show of prosperity. She had devoted herself however, too unreservedly to making people up, ever to be weaned from it by any second passion. Her love for a married life might prove stronger of the two but it could not be without intertwining it self with her love to stylize.

Such a union accordingly took place and was attended with truly remarkable consequences and a deeply impressive moral. One day soon after their marriage , Alina sat gazing at her husband with that make-up artist look and a trouble in her countenance that grew stronger until she spoke,

“Aslam,” she said, “has it never occurred to you to perhaps try to lose some weight.”

“No indeed,” said he, smiling, but perceiving the seriousness of her manner he became a trifle concerned. “To tell you the truth I have so often been called cute because of it, that I was simple enough to believe it.”

“Ah, on someone else’s husband perhaps, but not on you,” replied his wife. “You are rich, accomplished, educated, in fact you come so near to being perfect that this slight drawback, which we hesitate whether to term as corpulence or cuteness, shocks me.”

“Shocks you, my wife!” cried Aslam, deeply hurt; reddening with momentary anger. “Then why did you take me from my mother’s side? You cannot love what shocks you!”

To explain this conversation it must be mentioned, that Alina’s husband, Aslam was stupendously over weight, though alina was beauty conscious , but for a life partner, she new that good looks alone, wouldn’t cater her needs, she wanted a name which would strike the society, a cache with a big bank balance and a dupe who will not only let her do as she please but himself will also do as she pleases. The only flaw in their otherwise perfect marriage was Aslam’s obesity. At first Alina had thought she’ll cope with it, and that it won’t matter so much, but then, whenever they entertained any friends or went to any of those high profile parties, Aslam’s being too fat always hindered her dream of engendering that perfect image. Had Alina lived a low profile life it wouldn’t have mattered a cent, but Alina had certain decorum in the society. She couldn’t bear to face her elite friends; she felt them eyeing her with a mocking smile.

Her husband’s excessive weight was her liability to deteriorate, perish and then vanish completely from the social clique and squeeze her into an obsolete rabble. Alina’s superficial imagination was not long in rendering his being an obese a major threat to their happiness.

At all the social gatherings which would have been their happiest, she invariably and without intending it, nay, in spite of a purpose to the contrary, reverted to this one disastrous topic. Trifling as it first appeared, it so connected itself with innumerable trains of thought and model of feeling that it became the central point of all.

“Why can’t you diet?” complained Alina one day on their way back home for yet another depressing party, as they had become for her now.

“No.” said Aslam firmly.

“Why not, can’t you eat sensibly for a while?”

“I do eat sensibly Alina, but reducing my diet just doesn’t help, it just gives me fatigue and dark circles.”

“You could walk or perhaps jog.”

“I already do have plenty of exercise carrying your vanity-box, besides its no use I know.”

“Pills perhaps?” she said with a twinkle of hope.

“Alina dear, you have too long been in this business to not know about its effectiveness.”

“Yeah I do.” sighed Alina.

“Why can’t we live happily the way we used to?”
“Hmm... why not my dearest we already are.” Tania said sweetly, for a while aborting the valueless issue.

They seemed to be at peace for a while, and then a friend of Alina’s, visited.

“You know what Alina?” she said, while sipping tea from Alina’s perfect china-wear.

“What?” Alina said, anticipating some spicy gossip.

“I went to Shania’s yesterday and she said that fats are absolutely in, fat bags, fat pockets, fat-heads, fat hubbies and Alina is being named the trend-setter.” The smile on Alina’s face disappeared, but Shazia didn’t notice she was too much engrossed in her own jokes.

“He, he, ho, ha, isn’t it just funny.” Shazia had gone all red with laughter little did she know that she had trespassed forbidden boundaries.

This visit from her friend had left Alina more despondent than ever, she stayed quiet all the time and didn’t like going anywhere. This troubled her loving husband a lot. So early one morning, Aslam himself for the first time, voluntarily took up the subject.

“Alina, what exactly do you have in mind for this problem of ours?”

“I have given the subject a lot of thought, and I have a perfect plan, that is if you agree to cooperate” she said batting her eyelashes.

“I’ll do anything for you my sweet wife; I’m even willing to go to the moon for you.” He said passionately trying to make his wife smile.

“For the moment, going to the gym will do, you’ll take a highly-nutritious, dietitian- recommended, low-fat-diet and you’ll join dance classes.” she said hastily.

“And what will happen of my work.”

“It can be taken care of by that device of yours, what do you call it? Blackberry? Or is it gooseberry?”

“Yes, but…” he started to protest.

“No buts, you’ll have to do this for me.”

The next day Alina apprised her husband of the whole plan she’ll be his personal stylist. She’ll do the work she was best at one last time on her husband, and in a month or so, he’ll still be the talk of the town but with a difference. The colors of her life will return, she would become the object of envy amidst the crème de la crème, and her heart exulted at the thought.

Aslam relied completely on his wife’s mental abilities (read make-over abilities) , and now she was playing her perfect stylist role, she didn’t miss a thing, weighed him daily, forced him to his daily check-ups, shopped for his diet food personally and went into such details, as if her life itself, depended on the success of the task.

All her efforts were not without avail, for her husband lost 80 pounds in a month, and was quickly turning into a handsome hunk, and she couldn’t wait to take him, to one of those ‘who’s who’ parties.

Then one day she received that fatal call, from her friend Shazia,

“I saw your husband last night …” she started to say.

“I know what you saw, you don’t need to drool all over him `coz he’s my husband.” interrupted Alina.

“Oh, poor Alina! It seems you have no idea that your husband’s affair is the talk of the town.”

“Poor? No, happiest and richest, and anyways it does come as a big surprise, after all, I worked hard for this day, planning his diets and all.” Alina said reckoning her to be talking about the drastic change in Aslam’s physique.

“Oh, no Alina, I’m talking about your husband’s affair with his dance instructor Dina, it’s been the talk of the town since a week, I would’ve not believed a word if I hadn’t seen for myself, the rascal had the guts to bring her to an official gathering at ……” but Alina wasn’t listening anymore, the phone had dropped from her hands, how was it possible, she felt like the carpet has been pulled from under her feet and she had fallen right over her face. What disgrace, what a shame.

Alas! It was too true.

She had seen the symptoms too. That constant smile on his face, those long phone calls, and those extra sprays of cologne, but she had shunned all the doubts, and now she had lost it all, in the desire of having it all.

The story of this lady ends here, but dear reader, you must be wondering what it has to do with that politician, and well I’m wondering that too, so let’s wonder together.

THE END