I think the title says it all. |
You’ll have to forgive me, I just couldn’t speak The light in your eyes Made my tongue go all weak. That look of desire You wore like a hat Twisted my emotions This way and that. You said it was over, That much you must recall But here you stand panting Wanting me after all. Let me tell you a secret You maybe don’t know All that affection for you Was just a really good show. You see I knew you were lying And I knew you were cheating And if I had a bat then I’d have given you such a beating. It was just so much fun To hear creative alibis And shred your favorite jeans And cut up your ties. It’s true I was hurt once But only in the beginning When I noticed your devotion Was all about winning. While it’s true I’m a prize, Worthy of far more than you The betrayal you spun for me Left me briefly quite blue. But somehow, someway, I still chose to forgive you Your queasy charm damned, I did it just for spite too. One morning I woke up And the air was so clear I actually smiled wide When I knew you weren’t here. I tossed your musty pillow And those beer mugs from hell And, well, your mom’s wine glasses Accidentally fell… I used your toothbrush To clean out my grout And you know it worked quite well To get those stains out! I poured out your Rogaine And tossed your clothes in the fire To be honest, that morning I couldn’t have felt higher. I took all those white socks With holes in the toes And gave them to Goodwill For barefoot hobos. I tossed out the sheets You last put your butt on And scrubbed the shower Till all trace of you was gone. Me and Juanita, You know that girl that you hate Might of even used a spell to make sure you don’t date. Forgiveness, they say, Is a wonderful thing But the freedom of singlehood Is much better than a ring. So, no, there is nothing In the apartment’s that’s yours Perhaps you can find some stuff In the local thrift stores. I’d offer you some coffee But I’d just rather sleep Perhaps you could leave now And come back next week. You see I’ve done all my crying And cursed all the gods But in the end, realized You were just a real clod. So pack up your twinkling eyes And that stupid goatee And remember only in your dreams Do you still have me |