Humor and sarcasim (This is not intended to provide any type of medical advice!) |
PHILOSOPHER'S GENERAL WARNING: Living may result in one or more of the following side-effects: Joy; Sadness; Sorrow; Accomplishment; Disappointment; Anger; Loss; Envy; Lust; Love; Rage; Elation; Depression; Uncertainty; Happiness; Fulfillment; Contentment; Shame; Hunger; Pain; Illness; A myriad of injuries and ailments; Thoughtlessness; Thoughtfulness; General discomfort; and Distress. -Studies show that not all symptoms will occur in equal measure in subjects tested; and some may occur more frequently than others. -In all cases where living has been diagnosed, the affliction is always terminal; though the duration varies with some cases reporting periods in excess of a hundred years. -While no acceptable cure has been found, the following treatment is recommended and should be initiated immediately following diagnosis of this condition: LIVE WELL, LOVE MUCH, LAUGH OFTEN -While this treatment regimen may not cure this dreadful affliction it will induce a quasi-euphoric state which has proven to alleviate some if not all of the worst symptoms associated with this condition. -Once treatment has begun it should be continued throughout the course of this disease. Discontinuing treatment early may heighten the more adverse effects of this disease. -As this disease has long since reached pandemic levels all efforts at quarantine have proven ineffective. So sit back, take a deep breath, and enjoy the ride... |