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by Dragyn Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ · Other · Satire · #1364683
Humor and sarcasim (This is not intended to provide any type of medical advice!)
PHILOSOPHER'S GENERAL WARNING:

Living may result in one or more of the following side-effects: Joy; Sadness; Sorrow;
Accomplishment; Disappointment; Anger; Loss; Envy; Lust; Love; Rage; Elation; Depression; Uncertainty; Happiness; Fulfillment; Contentment; Shame; Hunger; Pain; Illness; A myriad of injuries and ailments; Thoughtlessness; Thoughtfulness; General discomfort; and Distress.

-Studies show that not all symptoms will occur in equal measure in subjects tested; and some may occur more frequently than others.

-In all cases where living has been diagnosed, the affliction is always terminal; though the duration varies with some cases reporting periods in excess of a hundred years.

-While no acceptable cure has been found, the following treatment is recommended and should be initiated immediately following diagnosis of this condition:

LIVE WELL, LOVE MUCH, LAUGH OFTEN

-While this treatment regimen may not cure this dreadful affliction it will induce a quasi-euphoric state which has proven to alleviate some if not all of the worst
symptoms associated with this condition.

-Once treatment has begun it should be continued throughout the course of this disease. Discontinuing treatment early may heighten the more adverse effects of this disease.

-As this disease has long since reached pandemic levels all efforts at quarantine have proven ineffective. So sit back, take a deep breath, and enjoy the ride...
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