Don't look.
You know exactly where she is
the exact empty look she'll give
And awkward glance away
You know exactly how she looks in this light
Exactly how she sits in a chair
And exactly how much of your implications
She'll take
You know exactly how she looks when she smiles
Exactly how she looks when she frowns
You know she's with someone else
Don't look.
Don't Breathe.
You know exactly how she smells
Exactly how her scent burns some recess of your mind
Better left unaware it exists
You know exactly what buttons she'll push
What feelings she'll evoke
Don't breathe.
Don't look.
I can't pretend I'm okay
I know exactly how the anxiety feels
I know exactly what I want to see
I know exactly how much I can take
I know exactly what the outcome will be
And I know exactly how empty I'll feel if I
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