Benefits of Imaginary Friends

Benefits of Imaginary Friends

Problem: Betty Smith said in her novel A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, "Because... the child must have a valuable thing which is called imagination. The child must have a secret world in which live things that never were." For most children, friends that do not exist are their ‘secret world.' Imaginary friends are... "the mysterious characters who often take up residence in family homes" (Asthana np). These creatures, people, or stuffed animals "offer companionship and emotional support, aid creativity, boost self esteem, and create a ‘sense of self'" (Asthana np). However, some parents disagree with their child's talking to something that is not truly there.
         Experts have declared parents meddling with a child's imagination is a huge no-no. With many pros to having an imaginary friend, such as the art of separating one's self from their adult counterparts, having one is nearly a necessity in childhood (McDermott np). With television taking over the minds of today's generation, imagination provides an outlet for a little creation that is being sucked away through the new electronics. Studies have found that confidence through heightened creativity has appeared in children with invented friends (McDermott np). Says Karen Majors, a psychologist, "Imaginative children will create imaginary friends. Companionship is a big part of it. They can be a way of boosting self-confidence... And it's very healthy" (McDermott np).
         Several different categories of children establish imaginary friends. Research conducted at the Institute of Education in England discovered girls confide in younger friends while boys find themselves attracted to mature heroic pals (McDermott np). Young children who experience the torture of bullying also make themselves a hero to help them face their adversary (McDermott np). 
         Imaginary friends are not the problem. The lack of imagination is. This is why parents should encourage their children to make a dream playmate. Perhaps even adults need one from time to time. "Explorer Dave Mill created his imaginary friend Nobody at the age of 34 as a survival mechanism during a solo walk to the North Pole" (McDermott). Clearly, it worked.
Solution: "Life would lack poignant drama without the use of imagination and we probably would not have the courage to follow our dreams and desires" (Holmes np). Parents who push for their children releasing of their imaginary playmates have got it all wrong. As the child grows in an unfriendly world, they could use the unconditional support and love of an imaginary friend. They "offer companionship and entertainment and can help buck children up for tough times" (Elias np).
         Normality seems to be an issue with some parents. They are concerned their child has psychological problems when they begin talking to air. However, this is perfectly normal as they "explore a strange world that may sometimes seem frightening" and is a "quite natural and useful growing tool" (Mullen np). A researcher has even discovered growing children "have not had many years to adjust their thinking" thus, they cannot yet judge what is or is not reality (Holmes np). Eventually, their perspective of such will grow and they will come to realize that the friend they thought they were just discussing chocolate milk versus regular milk with is not truly there. The pals "are either forgotten, sometimes sent on a distant and permanent trip, or ‘die' in a horrible accident (Holmes np)."
         Furthermore, parents can learn a bundle of information from their little one if they listen carefully. Some children, when they are discussing their companion openly, they are truly referring to their own fears and passions (Mullen np). "By paying attention to how and when imaginary friends appear in your child's life, you can learn a lot about your child as a little person. The occurrence of imaginary companions and fantasy play show you that the child is beginning to think abstractly. And this, I can tell you, is a remarkable event," said Kylie Holmes (Holmes np).
Opposition: The opposing parents argue mostly for the side of wanting their children to talk to real people (McDermott np). "If your child spends a majority of their time with the imaginary pal," said Amy Mullen, "and refuses to relate with real children, they may have a problem that needs to be addressed" (Mullen np). However, if it is the normal childhood phase of talking to that dinosaur in the corner, parents need to let it go.
         Others who think outside the box swear their children are talking to Satan's demons (Elias np).  Marjorie Taylor from the University of Oregon had a woman bring her child and... "a Bible to the lab and said she was praying every day for the devil to leave her child" (Elias np). Taylor continued to explain that if a child said an imaginary being was forcing him or her to do unwanted things, then, yes, that child does need psychological assistance (Elias np).
         All in all, imaginary friends are benefits not monsters of the mind. They give children creativity, a sense of themselves, and a boost in confidence. For parents, all they need is a little imagination of their own to see how truly blessed and beautiful his or her child's mind is.

Alexa Dawson

Bibliography:

Asthana, Anushka. "Imaginary Pals a Tonic for Children." 8 Jul. 2007  <http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2007/jul/08/childrensservices.schools>.
Elias, Marilyn. "'Pretend' Friends, Real Benefits." USA Today. 19 Dec. 2004 <http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2004-12-19-real-play-usat_x.htm>.
Holmes, Kylie. "Do Children's Imaginary Friends Only Exist in a Child's Imagination?" 27 Mar. 2008 <http://searchwarp.com/swa51433.htm>.
Holmes, Kylie. "Children's Imaginary Friends: Imagination or Spiritual?" 2006 <http://www.esolibris.com/articles/angels_spirits/childrens_imaginary_friends.php>.
McDermott, Nick. "Why Having an Imaginary Friend is Good for Children." 9 Jul. 2007 <http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=467097&in_page_id=1770>.
Mullen, Amy. "The Very Real Benefits for Children with Imaginary Friends." 10 Oct. 2005 <http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/10795/the_very_real_benefits_for_children.html>.